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confused580 · Mar 25, 2010, 09:18 PM

Originally Posted by Kitkat22

I just am so proud of you! I KNOW you can do this! Here is a big HUG for you and I mean that as friend. I'm old enough to be your mom, so I'll just talk to you like a mom.:)

Thank you Kitkatt :)

I don't know I'm so obsessed with this girl... Its maybe just that I can't picture no one else with her. Im just picturing her happy meeting the guy of her dreams, etc... I need to take my mind off that as u guys mentioned, and to work on myself to have a happy life

vanheart · Mar 25, 2010, 09:22 PM

Yup. Why are you? One of lots of questions.

Good, man.

confused580 · Mar 27, 2010, 12:24 AM

So my aunt called me over to watch movies tonight. She lives across the hall from my ex. I stated as long as my ex was not there, I would come. So I went, and my ex wasn't over my aunts.

I go to the store and head downstairs and see this new car in front of her place, and then the guy goes to her apt. My heart sunk... Anyway, I went back to my aunts, finished the movie and was leaving... BTW, my ex had no idea I was over there.

When I left, I heard them two going at it (sex), and I had an out of body experience... My heart COMPLETELY SANK... It sunk so bad, I did the unthinkable and sent her a text and said "You just screwed me 2 weeks ago!!!" and no reply.

I know this was stupid, my emotions went out of control, so I told my aunt I'm changing my number tomorrow.. She will have no future ways of getting in contact with me...

I know this girl ALL-TO-WELL... If she knew that I never knew about this, she would've contacted me eventually trying to meet, hook-up, etc...

All I can say is WOW... now I can't even sleep thinking about this... I keep tossing and turning visualizing this

pandead · Mar 27, 2010, 12:52 AM

Calm down, you made a mistake by texting her but oh well, it's human (I would probably kick her door and yell so it's not that bad... ) Making plans keeps me alive, maybe it can work for you.

You knew you could eventually run into her or "him" when you went there. You screwed up. It's fine. It hurts, it's normal. Try to sleep and if you really can't, put everything on a piece of paper. Make a plan. Try to stick to it.

You are making a huge progress, don't stop yourself.

confused580 · Mar 27, 2010, 01:06 AM

Originally Posted by pandead

Calm down, you made a mistake by texting her but oh well, it's human (I would probably kick her door and yell so it's not that bad...) Making plans keeps me alive, maybe it can work for you.

You knew you could eventually run into her or "him" when you went there. You screwed up. It's fine. It hurts, it's normal. Try to sleep and if you really can't, put everything on a piece of paper. Make a plan. Try to stick to it.

You are making a huge progress, don't stop yourself.

Thank you for that man, I really appreciate it. Good to find someone else still up... and yes I DID feel like kicking the door down. We just had sex 2 weeks ago(dumb mistake of me) and already you are screwing... Like I said in my original post, obviously she was talking to someone else while talking to me... It hasn't even been a month yet, WOW...

But yeah I made a mistake, almost grabbed a drink on the way home, but I said you know what... nevermind I won't do that

amicon · Mar 27, 2010, 01:19 AM

Good job not hitting the bottle.

Could you give your sponsor a call?

Actually speaking to someone might be a good idea now.

As for your ex having somebody in her life,and possibly having gone behind your back while you were still together- that sucks,but you're going to have to move past it and keep moving on.

confused580 · Mar 27, 2010, 01:35 AM

Originally Posted by amicon

Good job not hitting the bottle.

Could you give your sponsor a call?

Actually speaking to someone might be a good idea now.

As for your ex having somebody in her life,and possibly having gone behind your back while you were still together- that sucks,but you're going to have to move past it and keep moving on.

I'm getting a sponsor on Monday... I texted my ex and now she KNOWS that I know, so good rittens... She will never call me or text me again because now she knows that I know about tonight, so that's one less issue I will have to worry about from now on

vanheart · Mar 27, 2010, 01:46 AM

Dude,

As sucky as that incident was, I hope you got a few lessons out of it.

Who she is, who you are & what you want & to avoid proximity with her.
Tell your aunt to come over to your place next time.

Don't set yourself up for heartache.

Ya, know I almost wish I would have heard my girlfriend banging her new boyfriend.
But I did that in my head. 5 days after she dumped I went NC.
For good.

Same difference. There's really only one thing you do when someone doesn't want you. No longer want them.

Don't let this affect the great things you are doing for yourself & the progress you are making. This isn't about her, or anyone else really, its about you.

There's good people out there, don't you worry.

confused580 · Mar 27, 2010, 01:57 AM

Originally Posted by vanheart

Dude,

As sucky as that incident was, I hope you got a few lessons out of it.

Who she is, who you are & what you want & to avoid proximity with her.
Tell your aunt to come over to your place next time.

Dont set yourself up for heartache.

Ya, know I almost wish I would have heard my gf banging her new bf.
But I did that in my head. 5 days after she dumped I went NC.
For good.

Same difference. Theres really only one thing you do when someone doesnt want you. No longer want them.

Dont let this affect the great things you are doing for yourself & the progress you are making. This aint about her, or anyone else really, its about you.

Theres good people out there, dont you worry.

Yeah I usually don't stay up this late. I just took a sleep-aid... tired of tossing and turning... those images... AHHHHH GO AWAY images!

vanheart · Mar 27, 2010, 02:03 AM

Sleep aids aren't part of sobriety. So, find your strength w/o those.

One thing to understand is that's already happened.

In the past now. Up to you to rid those thoughts & replace them with other ones.

Just keep on the path.

I have bouts with insomnia. But I roll w/it. And rock it, regardless.

confused580 · Mar 27, 2010, 04:13 AM

Originally Posted by vanheart

Sleep aids arent part of sobriety. So, find your strength w/o those.

One thing to understand is thats already happened.

In the past now. Up to you to rid those thoughts & replace them with other ones.

Just keep on the path.

I have bouts with insomnia. But I roll w/it. And rock it, regardless.

Was thinking of changing my number. The stupid part is I did that last September 2009, and someone from my family gave her my number. Now I'll look like the fool who constantly changes his number

amicon · Mar 27, 2010, 04:28 AM

If you want to change your number,that's your business-it doesn't matter what people think.

It might be a good
I've done that myself-it worked for me.

Idea.

Kitkat22 · Mar 27, 2010, 10:44 AM

Originally Posted by vanheart

Sleep aids arent part of sobriety. So, find your strength w/o those.

One thing to understand is thats already happened.

In the past now. Up to you to rid those thoughts & replace them with other ones.

Just keep on the path.

I have bouts with insomnia. But I roll w/it. And rock it, regardless.

Work out! Jog! I think your ex is a an alcoholic who will ptobably go home with anyone if she's had enough to drink. She needs help! YOU CAN'T give her the help she needs. She's going to have to hit rock bottom before she decides to do something. Don't get pulled back!:rolleyes:

confused580 · Mar 27, 2010, 11:45 AM

About to change my phone number... im sick of this.

Kitkat22 · Mar 27, 2010, 11:46 AM

Originally Posted by confused580

about to change my phone number...im sick of this.

Good for you! Stay Strong!

confused580 · Mar 27, 2010, 12:39 PM

Originally Posted by Kitkat22

Good for you! Stay Strong!

Finally the number has changed :)

I figured it out. She was using me as a back-up in case this new flame didn't work... Now that her cover got blown, I hope she feels dumb. Now she has NO way of getting a hold of me... I stressed in the text message "please do NOT give this number out WITHOUT my permission

Kitkat22 · Mar 27, 2010, 12:54 PM

Originally Posted by confused580

Finally the number has changed :)

I figured it out. She was using me as a back-up in case this new flame didnt work...Now that her cover got blown, I hope she feels dumb. Now she has NO way of getting a hold of me...I stressed in the text msg "please do NOT give this number out WITHOUT my permission

Good for you! If the Aunt wants to see you let her come to your house. Good Luck!:)

confused580 · Mar 27, 2010, 01:04 PM

Thanks

confused580 · Mar 29, 2010, 02:57 PM

Originally Posted by Kitkat22

Good for you! If the Aunt wants to see you let her come to your house. Good Luck!:)

I seem to be the laughing stock of my family... Everyone seems to find it amusing I changed my number. Their first response was "You and her must be into it again". I changed my number this past July when we broke up, then she got my number from my uncle, and then we got back together..

Maybe I shouldve just kept the same number, it really makes me look like I'm full of drama

vanheart · Mar 29, 2010, 03:04 PM

You shouldn't worry about what everyone else thinks. Just you. This is for your own good, not there's.

To REMOVE the drama. Don't be influenced by negative crap.

Tell your uncle not to give it away this time...