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    Kitkat22's Avatar
    Kitkat22 Posts: 6,302, Reputation: 1191
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    #21

    Mar 29, 2010, 12:26 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Homegirl 50 View Post
    Then you need to leave her alone and move on with your life. You are both young and have a lot of living to do.
    Move on young man! You can do better!:)
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
    Dating & Teen Expert
     
    #22

    Mar 29, 2010, 12:31 PM

    There is someone else out there for you just as there is someone else out there for her.
    I think you both are merely growing up and away from each other.
    Kitkat22's Avatar
    Kitkat22 Posts: 6,302, Reputation: 1191
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    #23

    Mar 29, 2010, 12:33 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Homegirl 50 View Post
    There is someone else out there for you just as there is someone else out there for her.
    I think you both are merely going up and away from each other.
    Take the advice!:)
    hugostrange22's Avatar
    hugostrange22 Posts: 72, Reputation: 1
    Junior Member
     
    #24

    Apr 8, 2010, 02:43 AM

    Call me stubborn... I've been hanging in there... but I haven't given up... a bond like I had just doesn't disappear... I'm going to wait this out even if it hurts me more in the long run...

    I cried last night for hours... and I felt so good, I must be doing something right...

    Just a small update... she showed me affection and said she still loved me when we were supposed to be only friends...

    I'm scared that she only started this out of boredom and now she can't see reality from the internet... I'm still keeping in small contact with her every once in a while and I'm planning to visit a week and a half from now witch she is fine with...

    Anyone have any comments? I'm going to bed soon, I'll check this later

    Thanks guys :)

    Oh... but she's still with him... and I'm hardly getting any attention (sorry the last post could be misleading)
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
    Uber Member
     
    #25

    Apr 8, 2010, 04:31 AM

    I hope you start thinking with your brain soon instead of with your heart.

    Its up to you how much longer you want to spend in this limbo,but a good move would be to start moving on.
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
    Dating & Teen Expert
     
    #26

    Apr 8, 2010, 06:34 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by hugostrange22 View Post
    oh...but shes still with him...and I'm hardly getting any attention (sorry the last post could be misleading)
    Well that ought to tell you something!
    The longer you hold on to this fantasy the longer you will hurt,
    And until you are ready to let go there is nothing anyone can say
    To help you.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #27

    Apr 8, 2010, 02:53 PM

    You are completely ignoring the facts, as she has slowly been leaving you alone, and putting you in the friend zone, while getting with some one else.

    Can I ask where has your dignity, and self respect gone, to accept this sort of treatment? You are holding on to a false hope that she will change her mind, and she might if this new guy doesn't work out.

    Young man, its time to stop being stubborn, and look after you for a change, and tell your broken heart to shut the "F" up so your brain can kick in. You have enough facts to leave her alone, and start doing your thing, and stop waiting for her to take you back.

    Happens to us all, as we go from high school, to the reality of the real adult world, so start acting, and thinking, like the adult you are, and not the high school kid you were.
    hugostrange22's Avatar
    hugostrange22 Posts: 72, Reputation: 1
    Junior Member
     
    #28

    Apr 10, 2010, 08:04 PM
    We started talking a little more recently... she says sometimes it hurts to talk to me but we both still really want to be friends, is there anything wrong with that? How often do people stay friends after being engaged for a year knowing each other for 3 and a half? Lol
    Kitkat22's Avatar
    Kitkat22 Posts: 6,302, Reputation: 1191
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    #29

    Apr 10, 2010, 08:14 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by hugostrange22 View Post
    We started talking a little more recently...she says sometimes it hurts to talk to me but we both still really wanna be friends, is there anything wrong with that? how often do people stay friends after being engaged for a year knowing each other for 3 and a half? lol
    It would be difficult to remain just friends with someone you were so close too. It will only make it worse. Break free.. speak when you run into her.. but start rebuilding your life without... her:)
    vanheart's Avatar
    vanheart Posts: 2,806, Reputation: 708
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    #30

    Apr 10, 2010, 08:23 PM

    Stop letting her control what you want.

    Her, basically...

    You will only be able to be friends with her until you forget the romance.
    Not sure why you would want to. Unless she was a long time pal.

    And get over the fact she doesn't want a romantic, sexual or any other relationship with you, really.

    She's letting you go slowly. That's how girls are. They want to stay pals.
    She won't be your girlfriend.

    Are you into that?
    Kitkat22's Avatar
    Kitkat22 Posts: 6,302, Reputation: 1191
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    #31

    Apr 10, 2010, 08:33 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by vanheart View Post
    Stop letting her control what you want.

    Her, basically...

    You will only be able to be friends with her until you forget the romance.
    Not sure why you would want to. Unless she was a long time pal.

    And get over the fact she doesnt want a romantic, sexual or any other relationship with you, really.

    Shes letting you go slowly. Thats how girls are. They wanna stay pals.
    She wont be your gf.

    Are you into that?

    You can not go on thinking there is a future with this girl. There isn't! We cannot wave a magic wand and make her love you. Stop letting her lead you down the garden path. Stop wallowing and feeling sorry for yourself. You are too nice a guy for that. Make a clean break... Sorry that's it!:rolleyes:
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
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    #32

    Apr 10, 2010, 09:50 PM

    Do you want to heal from the breakup?
    Then NC is your best option.

    Or do you want to spend another couple of months in limbo,feeding off the odd crumb or two of false hope you are being feed?

    Then by all means,try friendship.. .
    vanheart's Avatar
    vanheart Posts: 2,806, Reputation: 708
    Ultra Member
     
    #33

    Apr 10, 2010, 10:11 PM

    Yup, right now she is your end all...

    Just past memories actually.

    Nothing else that's important or to live for. Huh?

    Silly.

    Focus now on other stuff.
    Kitkat22's Avatar
    Kitkat22 Posts: 6,302, Reputation: 1191
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    #34

    Apr 10, 2010, 10:24 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by vanheart View Post
    Yup, right now she is your end all...

    Just past memories actually.

    Nothing else thats important or to live for. Huh?

    Silly.

    Focus now on other stuff.
    You need to stop whining and stand up and walk away. She doesn't love you! It happens! Look at the world around and enjoy it. There are a millions of girls and I guarantee you this.. if you ever want to have a relationship you're going to have to grow up and stop being a weak, whining kid... Good luck.:)
    vanheart's Avatar
    vanheart Posts: 2,806, Reputation: 708
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    #35

    Apr 10, 2010, 10:27 PM

    Oh, yeah. One thing I forgot to tell you which can help you move on.

    She doesnt want you. Shes moved on, Shes with someone else.

    Didja get that?

    Ouch, but after all, she's already slapped you. Mines just in text form.
    Kitkat22's Avatar
    Kitkat22 Posts: 6,302, Reputation: 1191
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    #36

    Apr 10, 2010, 10:29 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by vanheart View Post
    Oh, yeah. One thing I forgot to tell you which can help you move on.

    She doesnt want you. Shes moved on, Shes with someone else.

    Didja get that?

    Ouch, but after all, shes already slapped you. Mines just in text form.
    Good.. somebody needs too. Use the wand Van!:eek:
    High Max's Avatar
    High Max Posts: 271, Reputation: 43
    Full Member
     
    #37

    Apr 11, 2010, 06:20 AM

    Should you stay friends with her? Absolutely not. Do not give her that satisfaction after she dumped you for some guy she met on the internet, come on now.
    Kitkat22's Avatar
    Kitkat22 Posts: 6,302, Reputation: 1191
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    #38

    Apr 11, 2010, 08:40 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by High Max View Post
    Should you stay friends with her? Absolutely not. Do not give her that satisfaction after she dumped you for some guy she met on the internet, come on now.
    No more coddling you... Stand up! Walk away! Get a life which doesn't include her!:rolleyes:

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