[shelley07]

First and foremost; I would like to Thank you for taking the time to read this!

I'm looking for some non-judgemental insight/advice on a very
Confusing ex? It's a long story but he and I dated for almost 2 years and he
Broke up with me suddenly because of his "hang-ups". Shortly after that
He started dating another woman but remained in contact with me via text
Messaging on a consistent basis. He once even told me that he loved me
And that he always would. Let me add, that when it came to my asking
If he were still involved with this woman, he would avoid the question
Period and I never got an answer out of him.
His new Girlfriend looked on his phone and found the text messages that
He and I were sending to each other and called me herself to inform me
That they were together and she wanted to know what was going on
Between me and him. I told her it was nothing more than text messaging and
That nothing had ever happened and that I wasn't even aware that he had
A girlfriend as he never told me so. Well, it wasn't a one time thing
With her calling, it had become very consistent and she was calling me
From the time he would leave for work until the time he came home
Telling me about their problems and wanting to be friends with me. I felt bad
At first, but quickly became very annoyed by this because it got to
The point that she was trying to pull me into the middle of their
Problems and was trying to accuse my ex and I of something that we weren't
Doing. So, I broke down and called my ex myself and told him to tell his
Girlfriend to quit calling me, that I didn't want to get involved with
Their problems and that I had moved on with someone else. Well, her
Calls quit and he and I went a few months without talking at all.
Around that time, I saw him in Wal Mart with her and he tried to speak
To me and I walked past without saying anything to him at all. I felt
Bad about this, so I texted him a few days later just to say hello and
That I hoped all was well for him. I got a reply a couple days later
From him practically boasting to me that she was 2 months pregnant and
That they were getting married and how excited he was. (This sounds
Majorly out of character for him, as well as I know him, he never really took
To kids in the first place. He told me at one point that he wasn't
Sure if he wanted to have children and the word marriage even freaked him
Out. And his girlfriend told me herself that she couldn't have
Children). So, I didn't know what to think of this but I kind of freaked out and
Retaliated in any way I could and told him how I was with a real man
Now and how happy he made me. I know I shouldn't have done so but I was
Acting on a complete whim out of hurt. I just thought it was totally
Uncalled for on his behalf to rub it in my face. We got into a pretty
Heated argument and he was saying things such as "He must not be much of a
man if you're still texting me" and putting me down in a way, things of
That sort. He was also saying that his girlfriend said that I was the
One that wouldn't quit calling her and that I was harassing her. Which
I assured him it was completely the other way around, as I had
Witnesses to it if he didn't believe me. Which led to him asking me if she had
Called me lately.
Fast-Forward to now. About a week ago, my sister saw him in a bar with
His girlfriend, she said they were both drinking and that she didn't
Look pregnant at all, which makes me wonder even more about the so-called
Pregnancy he bragged to me about. A couple days later, I get a text
Message from him asking me what I was up to and where I was at. He was
Being real nice to me this time acting as if nothing ever happened. I had
A few drinks so I told him that I missed him and he was like, "Do you
really mean that? Or are you just saying that because you've been
drinking?" And I told him to talk to me soon, and he replied to me, "U
2." This was last Saturday night and I haven't said anything to him,
Other than a Joke-Forward that I had sent to everyone in my phone. I
Didn't get a reply from and he hasn't said anything to me since that
Night.
I do love him, I always will. But I have dated other men since him, and
Meeting new people isn't out of the question for me. The thing is, the
People I do meet, always turn out to be unemployed losers or there's
Just no chemistry at all.
I was wondering, what's your take on him? Do you think he still has
Feelings for me? Do you think he was purposely trying to make me jealous
With the whole pregnancy thing? I'm so confused LOL!
I truly appreciate your taking the time to read this and I hope I
Haven't held you up. Any help or advice would be greatly appreciated! I look
Forward to hearing from you very soon! Thank you so very much and Many
Blessings to you-Shelley

[AKaeTrue]

It's strange that he would lie about the pregnancy thing to make you jealous.
My first thought on the situation was that his girlfriend probably told him she was pregnant out of desperation since it sounds like their relationship was on the rocks.
If she was drinking, she's probably not pregnant.
I have known of girls to fake a pregnancy and then fake a miscarriage out of desperation...

He really doesn't sound like a guy I'd suggest you to hang yourself up on.
For one, he's with this other woman and not you.
I find it hard to believe that someone can have deep feelings for an ex, but yet continue in another relationship.
I find it that in these cases, they are just keeping the person (you) on the back burner just in case things don't work out with the current relationship.
Sometimes people just like to know that someone is going to be there for when they are alone.
I'd say move on like you've been doing.
You'll find someone that's not a looser...
There are a lot of losers out there, but there are lots that are not and you'll find one of those good men if you keep searching...
Best wishes.

[Expert in the field]

The best advice I can give you is to move on with your life. You and your ex both still will have feelings for ech other. They will never go away. Besides that, he is the one that left and found another woman. His girlfriend is feeling theatened by the text messages. Time heals but I can understand the feeling of being alone. You have seen other people and you say they are losers. It may be because you are not giving it a chance because of your feelings towards your ex. Yes, you have to "weed" out the bad ones but one time the right one will come along if you give it a chance. Stop texting your ex cause it brings back those feelings. Your feelings you can control. But with time, you will succeed. Worry about yourself and make yourself happy cause honey, you're the only one that can. Trust me when I say this. When you make yourself happy things just follow naturally.
Good luck