[SAJ_Fells]

Bravo. Yea I'm the one who insulted somebody. You must didn't see what she said to me? That was a jab.

[SAJ_Fells]

That's my point. I came here for advice, not to be judge. I know we have issues. I do. That's why I came here, hoping to find somebody in or have been in my same position, but all I get is a spelling check. Why

[SAJ_Fells]

And to answer your sarcastic
Question or whatever, having sex with virgins make you less vulnerable too diseases.

[talaniman]

So you can sift through all the advice and take what you need and have the rest for later, just in case. Its mostly your presentation that riles others up, especially experienced females who take offense at your rather cavalier attitude toward virgins and sex.

They just want you to think and present yourself as a more caring understanding fellow. Something to consider when in public, as you can only be judged by how you present yourself.

You may not agree, nor mean harm, but give it some thought before you dismiss it off hand because you THINK its unfair, or wrong.

Going the extra mile to use spell check, also helps your presentation. Just my OPINION.

[SAJ_Fells]

They just want you to think and present yourself as a more caring understanding fellow. Something to consider when in public, as you can only be judged by how you present yourself.

I really am a caring fellow. Always have been. Always been told I'm sweet when I don't try to be. It's just me. But I caught offense with this.

I said:

Is it OK that she has come to understand me, and this problem, and has allowed us to be in an open relationship ONLY this year, as long as I tell her everything, and don't fall for another girl? Again, we're going to be together next year, If God allows us to live that long.

And what I felt was a bit offensive.

She is willing to stay in a relationship with a man who is risking getting another woman pregnant AND catching an STD because he has a "problem" involving keeping his pants on?

And she wants you to tell her everything?

And you reference God in this scenario?

I think you and your girlfriend may very well deserve each other. I can't imagine either one of you finding anyone else on these terms.

I was being understanding and really just taking all the advice until she posted this. Will somebody please explain this to me, because maybe I took it wrong.

[talaniman]

Its very simple, most females hate cheating (guys are exactly the same), and they love honesty. When you tweek the emotions of anyone, they react with their own feelings and opinions, and yes sometimes its very harsh to your ears, but those are the times you step back and actually see what's being said and why, and get facts, and not just feelings.

We all have feelings, strong ones that have been experienced through hurt, and pain, as would your experience with your female, should you behave badly.

Of course I have the advantage of knowing the posters here, and know how pasionately they can be in their efforts to help guide you through your own thinking.

If an unknown female can be so strong in their opinions, imagine your own, when you have to confess to making a mistake and giving into the temptations of which you speak about. You think they are tough on you, you have seen nothing until you really piss off, and anger the one you are with.

That's all they want you to see, woman ain't taking no crap for any reason. They were direct, and nice considering the gravity of your question.

The message was DON'T SCREW WITH A FEMALES HEART! If you do, there is hell to pay!

[JudyKayTee]

Woooahhh, Please don't go there talking about you can spell. Ha!

This little editor thing has a spell check, besides your grammar isn't correct as it seems is it?

Catching "an" STD? Do you mean "a" STD? Yea. I'll past, you just lost all my respect.

Seems to me you people think when someone says they likes to have sex, that means its automatically with 30 people. Haha, gosh you are funny. I know me better than anyone, and yes I've been checked, and yes I know about EVERY person I've had sex with. P.S. All Virgins. So please don't even make your self look intelligent by arguing with someone for or five times younger than you. Talk what you know and not what YOU assume.

Sorry - but it's AN STD OR a Sexually Transmitted Disease. Did I get your respect back?

So your speciality is virgins - women who don't have other partners and, therefore, have no means by which to judge your performance. Probably a smart move on your part.

You are 5 or 6 times younger than me? I thought so - you're still in elementary school! No wonder you think the way you do.

So - I KNOW your grammar is faulty, I KNOW your specialty is virgins, I KNOW you aren't 5 or 6 times younger than me.

Oh, and if you think arguing age is going to embarrass me, it's not, so pick something else.

And as far as your question and what you have posted about yourself - I don't know you. I had no pre-conceived notions about you. The info I have is what you posted. You are passive/aggressive and come off like a real jerk.

If you have a high sex drive and only have sex with virgins there mustn't be a virgin within miles and miles of you.

And, yes, boys who pride themselves on how many virginities they can take DO make me sick to my stomach. I trust the virgins are all of legal age?

[Enigma1999]

Again, I will repeat... if you feel as if you have a sex addiction problem, then get professional help.

I will also repeat... I am not judging you for having an addiction problem. These things happen. So. Fine. No shame, just get help for it. I applaud you for realizing that you DO have a problem.

Here is my advice to you, and you can either like it or not, or even insult me in another post if you will. I really think that you SHOULDN'T be in a relationship right now until this is rectified. Why take that chance of hurting someone that you care about?

I'm sure you do care for her, or else why are you here. When I first read your post, I had compassion. I gave you the benefit of the doubt. THEN I read other posts that you made, and your passive aggressive ways started to wear my patience thin. Tal is right, it's all in how you presented yourself.

Let me share something with you, from a woman to a man. Virginity is a sacred thing for most women. It is about us sharing ourselves with a man that we care about. Revealing ourselves. Giving ourselves.

So, when you make a rude comment about "having sex with virgins are less vulnerable to diseases", think about why I or anyone else should take you seriously.

[JudyKayTee]

It's one thing to admit to having a problem. It's quite another thing to do something about it.

Out of greenies - but well said.

And I can address what I meant when I answered the OP:

She is willing to stay in a relationship with a man who is risking getting another woman pregnant AND catching an STD because he has a "problem" involving keeping his pants on?

TRANSLATION: Your girlfriend is willing to stay in a relationship with you, a person who is risking getting another woman pregnant AND catching an STD because you have a "problem" involving keep your pants on.

And she wants you to tell her everything?

TRANSLATION: Your girlfriend wants to hear all the details of your sex life with other women.

And you reference God in this scenario?

TRANSLATION: Interesting that you think God has a place in all of this. I think you and your girlfriend may very well deserve each other. I can't imagine either one of you finding anyone else on these terms, those terms being you have sex with other women and tell her all the details, you risk her health, and you risk getting another woman pregnant (which in most circles is a death knell for another relationship). I see no "problems" on her part. I see your "problem" to be your confessed inability to keep your pants on.

[SAJ_Fells]

Ok, you are right. All of you. No sarcasm. Thank you.

[SAJ_Fells]

I didn't mean telling the details. I meant she wanted me to be honest to her about everything.

[SAJ_Fells]

The thing about it is I haven't had sex since we started going out a few months ago. But the temptations kick in every day, and I just felt it was gone get worse at college. That's why I'm here.

[SAJ_Fells]

Fair enough. And of course their legal. But the fact is, when I say I like sex, it really means that I like to have sexual relationships. I'll be faithful, I just want sex included. Virgins make me work hard to accomplish that, that's why I'm more attracted to them. Understand me better?

[talaniman]

High school is over, and the stakes are higher now as an adult.

Better adjust your thinking a bit.

[Enigma1999]

This girl that you are with now, what are your intentions with her? Long term, just sex, what?

When you first posted, you showed concern about temptations, an now you are focusing on virgins, and virginity. So what exactly is it that you want?

[SAJ_Fells]

No, the reference to virgins was towards my sex life before my two latest relationships. And my intentions are very long time.

[SAJ_Fells]

Ok, well said. Thank you.

[talaniman]

This girl that you are with now, what are your intentions with her? Long term, just sex, what?

When you first posted, you showed concern about temptations, an now you are focussing on virgins, and virginity. So what exactly is it that you want?

Makes me wonder how many virgins he has actually deflowered, or why this is actually a big deal.

[SAJ_Fells]

Why is it a big deal? I'm not even doing anything wrong, I just want advice.

[SAJ_Fells]

And you reference God in this scenario?

As for the God reference, I'm basically saying, if God let me live that long. I don't expect to see a tomorrow, but if It comes I'm thankful for it.