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starman_karl · Dec 17, 2010, 12:02 PM

Hi, I really, really like this girl who's in my class but she's going out with my old friend, who I had an argument with. Can someone please help me

talaniman · Dec 17, 2010, 12:23 PM

You are not going to like this, but whether you like the guy or not, leave the girl alone. She is unavailable to you.

liongal · Dec 17, 2010, 07:05 PM

What should you do? Nothing, aside from find your own girlfriend.

adviceishere · Jan 3, 2011, 10:34 AM

Sorry but I agree also, she's unavailable and if you make a move it will just prove your not trustworthy to her, you never know though, this may not last there could be a chance if they end it but you may also end up not even liking her by then.

starman_karl · Jan 28, 2011, 11:04 AM

Thanks guys... I guess your right...

starman_karl · Jan 28, 2011, 11:12 AM

I'm in a really messed up condition here... I use to like this girl but I'm not sure if she's interested in me or not. So now I'm just trying to forget about her, but ican't almost everything reminds me of her she's also in all of my classes. So it's hard to forget about her can you guys please help me out?

talaniman · Jan 28, 2011, 12:10 PM

How old are you both? And no need to start more questions about the same girl, keep it in one place, please.

starman_karl · Jan 28, 2011, 05:00 PM

I'm 18 she's the same

NukeNC · Jan 28, 2011, 05:15 PM

She is currently unavaliable to you man. You would risk losing your friendship with your old friend over her, and trust mewhen I say it would hurt a lot more for him if you did do this. Plus, do you want to start a relationship based on the terms that you had to break her up with her boyfriend to be with her? Doesn't sound like a great way to start.

talaniman · Jan 28, 2011, 05:29 PM

Is it fair to say you kept such focus on your ex/friend, and were trying to stay close because you thought she would want to take you back?

Willing to bet it is, and her getting back with the her ex was a shocking crushing blow that disappointed you, and was like the ultimate rejection?

Double the bet on that one. Man to man, nothing hurts like being dumped, staying friends with hopes for more, and having those hopes dashed to hell. Of course your going to be a whack job for a while as this signals the close of a chapter in your life that you were deeply emotionally invested. But guy you have to get yourself under control, and accept the situation for what it is. The End.

Start the healing process for yourself by reading the stickies, and letting the feelings pass, as you adjust to coping with your loss. Its very early in the process, so be patient as you look for other things to focus on, like all the people, and activities you neglected, while giving her your time, and attention. It's a long hard road and it will suck, but there are no magic pills or easy ways to avoid the pain that you feel, but it will fade soon, and get better. This happens to ALL of us, and we do survive and thrive.

So will you.