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Marriedguy · Sep 30, 2010, 02:08 PM

After you are done wrong how do you go about forgiveness?

Homegirl 50 · Sep 30, 2010, 03:08 PM

It is a long slow process. You can get there but you won't forget.
Has the person apologized?

Wondergirl · Sep 30, 2010, 03:16 PM

Remember, forgiveness is primarily for YOU, not for the offender. Forgiveness allows you to move forward in your life. Forgiveness says that you are a good person and courageous enough to put offenses behind you and not hold a grudge.

Can you do that?

answerme_tender · Sep 30, 2010, 03:17 PM

To stop dwelling over something someone has done to cause us pain, either physically or emotionally is like getting over an addiction. First we have to choose to stop, then with time you will soon notice that you don't even think about it as often, till you don't think about it at all. You have continue on with your life, and that's when some of us can finally forgive at that point. When we realize it no longer effects our lives.

Marriedguy · Sep 30, 2010, 03:22 PM

Yes... how long is process? I getting the feeling that it's not possible because years later I'm still feel hurt when memories resurfaces.

Wondergirl · Sep 30, 2010, 03:32 PM

Originally Posted by Marriedguy

Yes...how long is process? I getting the feeling that it's not possible because years later I'm still feel hurt when memories resurfaces.

You may never get to the point where you totally wipe the offense out of your mind. That doesn't mean you haven't forgiven. Obviously, you have moved forward and aren't stuck in a serious depression and spinning your wheels over what had happened.

Memory is good because it's a protection for your spirit to keep you from getting yourself into another situation that might have the same ending and a similar offense directed toward you. Yes, it will hurt, but that's a productive hurt, your shield going up in front of you. Just don't let that shield keep you from making good connections to people who are worthy of your love and loyalty.

talaniman · Sep 30, 2010, 06:39 PM

Who did you wrong
How they did you wrong
Why did they do you wrong

Answer these questions to bring you to understanding, and able to see the part you played, and forgive yourself, and then forgive them. That helps you let go of those old feelings, and start fresh with new ones.

Sorry, the process takes as long as it takes.

And you will never forget, and your not supposed to.