[koureli]

And you say I scare you... why? Because all I wanted in my life was to have girls and give them love and sex?

That's the reason I'm in this situation now because I never had what I only wanted and now I'm obsessed with it. I don't want to marry a woman who has been with 200 people and I have 0... simple as that. And at least in greece there aren't many women 18- 25 who didn't have meaningless relationships..

[koureli]

smoothy

You don't get it I will tell you again. If you have oxygen when I ask you what is the most important thing in life oxygen won't cross your mind.

If you starve on oxygen... ALL YOU WILL WANT IS OXYGEN.. even polluted.. you will not care...

[CravenMorhead]

I hate to be mean. I really do.

I am a guy and you exude creepiness. That sort of of low-life, dirty, scummy, feeling. The type you get when you see someone just not right at a school playground watching the kids. That feeling that causes mothers to grasp their children and cross the street when they see you coming.

What it seems to me is that you're tired of paying for prostitutes. You want all the privileges of a sexual relationship but none of the emotional responsibility of it. I believe they are called f**k buddies. Someone you can go and bag without having to care about them.

Whatever floats your boat and I am not going to judge you.

What you need to do? Dial back the creepiness factor. Stop being so desperate. You need to get your own confidence back. Forget about sex for a while, masturbate when you get horny. You got Internet access, porn is just a click or two away. Dial back the lust, the envy, and the self-pity. You need to make yourself honestly attractive to women.

You need to make yourself a better person. Most women can smell a player too. So you can't pretend, you really need to adjust your attitude.

The first thing you need to realize is that you're not alone in your situation. You will never know their names but there are countless people in your situation. As well there are countless people who have gotten OUT of your situation. It isn't going to happen over night. It is going to take work, a lot of hard work.

If you're not up for it, the hookers are just around the corner. You know where.

[koureli]

Your problem is that you think you are ENTITLED to women wanting you.


Yes.. after so much time and effort I think there should be at least 1 girl that would like me... but what I'm trying to tell is that because I don't know how to start anything, it shows and women are turned off when they meet someone that they expect is full of experience and then they get a 10 year old that doesn't even know how to start a kiss...

I have so many times cried and tried to harm myself in many ways because of that.. because of knowing that no matter how much I try... the result is the same... many times I think that life without fun isn't worthed of living...

For gods sake I even see the birds mating and I envy them...

[koureli]

CravenMorhead I HAVE ONLY Paid PROSTITUTES FOR 4 TIMES... JUST TO SEE WHAT I LOOSE... I HAVE EVEN CUT MASTURBATION... and you are very wrong I don't care about anyone... I care about all people and NEVER had a problem with anybody... maby that's where the problem starts... if I was an ******* at younger age where all it counts is that I would have normal sexual life now

[CravenMorhead]

CravenMorhead I HAVE ONLY PAYED PROSTITUTES FOR 4 TIMES... JUST TO SEE WHAT I LOOSE... I HAVE EVEN CUT MASTURBATION........ and you are very wrong i dont care about anyone... i care about all people and NEVER had a problem with anybody... maby thats where the problem starts... if i was an ******* at younger age where all it counts is that i would have normal sexual life now

And you're missing the point.

[koureli]

Anyway I go drink a bottle to forget who I really am and go out... wish me luck.. I hope the best for everybody who has replied.. see you

[koureli]

By the way I do have MANY friends and many female friends but I don't tell them anything about my situation, although I think some of them might suspect... cu latr

[smoothy]

smoothy

you dont get it i will tell you again. if you have oxygen when i ask you what is the most important thing in life oxygen wont cross your mind.

if you starve on oxygen....... ALL YOU WILL WANT IS OXYGEN.. even poluted.. you will not care...

Oh I understand what you said all right... You can live your entire life without ever having a woman and not suffer any problems... Monks and Priests of various religions do it all the time. So that excuse you just used speaks volumes.

This is all about your attitude. You are NOT entitled to nookie whenever the mood strikes you, with the way you clearly view women I'm not supprised you have to pay for sex. And the poor me, woe is me thing is a trick used by little children when their tantrums get them nothing. Its not an adult way of dealing with the situation, and most definitely going to send any women in the area RUNNING the other direction.

Seriously, you need to get concelling because of how YOU view things is NOT how you should be viewing them.

I'm not saying it can't be corrected, but you need a professional in the field to work with you to help YOU see the what, where, and how of what you are doing wrong.


Seriously are you really 27, it sounds like you are in your early teens.

[QLP]

Koureli, 90% of the focus is on what you want. The little bit where you do think about what the female might want is to assume she wants an experienced stud and will be put off by your inexperience. That is not the thing that is putting the ladies off. Your inability to see them as people rather than prospective lays is what will put them off.

Even a player knows that the way to play is to make a woman feel good about herself, even if only in a superficial way.

A genuine guy will want to get to know his partner and find out what she likes, out of the bedroom before in it. This means learning to listen to another person not just harping on about your own agenda, which you seem to be having difficulty with here as well.

[Synnen]

Can I get sex whenever I want?

Sure! I've also been married for 9 years, and with my husband for 14. That's since I was 21.

Does he get sex on a regular basis? SURE! But he made sure to be my friend, and to woo me, and to take me out and have fun with me. We didn't have sex at ALL until we'd been dating for some time.

I know you don't think you're looking for marriage, but you seriously seem to think that women are just out looking for a fling like you are--and most of us are NOT. Most of us are LOOKING for marriage material. And most of us have the good sense not to have sex with someone who has stated straight out that he's not sticking around--because WE (the women) are the ones that get PREGNANT--and we don't want a guy that isn't going to stick with us if we DO get pregnant. And please--don't even START with the birth control thing. I got pregnant using THREE forms of birth control correctly. If you have sex, there's a chance of a baby.

You need to get counseling. You ARE breathing oxygen--you're just not getting the kind you WANT. And frankly, it's not like oxygen at all. It's more like you're eating bread and water and want to have wine and cake without earning it.

Doesn't work that way.

You NEED to see a counselor. You need to understand that your views on women and sex are NOT healthy, and that women can sense that--and shy away from you because of it.

Experience sexually has NOTHING to do with what women want. Frankly, so many men get their instructions from porn that inexperience is almost welcome, because then you can teach a guy how to do it RIGHT.

You need to figure out how to like yourself, or no woman is going to like you.

And frankly--start looking at relationships differently. Most women NEVER have a couple night fling without thinking that it might lead to more.

[martinizing2]

You are wrong in that there are women who seek inexperienced men.
They want to take them and show them what they like men to do.

Hell you could put an ad online or in a paper and you might get swarmed with virgin busters.

Virgin man seeks vagina. Preferably not attached to female, but will negotiate with right party.

[JK191]

Everyone already told you what I thought you needed to hear. So I'm going with unconventional advice.

Read "The Game" by Neil Strauss. It will at minimum give you the tools to do what you want to do. If you comprehend all of it, you'll realise that what you want is foolish.

Either way, you'll gain something.

As for my opinion, I agree with all of Synnen's post.

[koureli]

You still don't gett it but I'm glad you answer at least. Let me give you an example of what my night was...

I went to a park I use to go and there were 4 of my friends 2 of my female friends and 5 girls I dintn know and they were VERY talkative to me... I did nothing... I could not do I could not start it...

Then I went outside a local bar before getting home... opposite of me were 4 girls 19 yo THAT I Didn't KNOW and one of them came HERSELF and started talking nonsense about her boy that had dumped her etc etc... and she wanted a hug and I gave her the hug and we talked and I'm sure she wanted me to "do the magic trick" BUT I Didn't KNOW THE ****ING TRICK... so when I saw that she was almost fed up and ready to leave I left first...

Don't you get the problem?? Girls get close to me because they think they will find the perfect lover maybe I don't know.. but I'm worse than the boy they had at 15... THAT IS THE PROBLEM.. that I look "cool" for my circle BUT inside I'm not... and eventually women get that...

This thing today has happened in many variations many time.. if I start talking to girls the way I really am then nobody will like me (because they aproach me for what I look like). If I pretend I am what I look like they find out I'm not... so it's a dead end either way...

[koureli]

If I had a normal sexuall life since I was a teen I would know what to do today... an maybe I would end up getting 2 or 3 of them tonight... like some of my friends do from time to time... I don't know the ****ing "password"

[Synnen]

There IS no password.

The password is "confidence" and "being yourself".

[QLP]

Try to stop worrying about who you are 'supposed to be' or who you aren't, and embrace who you are. If that means saying to girls, 'I'm embarrassed to admit but I'm rather shy around women' then so be it, at least it would be honest. I think you would be surprised how many women would find that more acceptable than the games you are trying to play - unsuccessfully.

As for saying you want 2 or 3 women a night, come on that's just greedy. Sure there are guys who have done this but there are guys who have 2 or 3 in a lifetime and are quite happy about it. You need to concentrate on one woman at a time and get that right instead of trying to compete with your friends.

[smoothy]

Sorry, but I still think this sounds exactly like a socially akward boy in his early teens that has misconceptions of what grown ups really do.

[koureli]

The problem is I AM NOT IN MY TEENS I would kill to go again and do it right... that was where the problem started in the first place

[Synnen]

But what's wrong with the way you did it?

You WISH you'd been a jerk and a player in your teens so that you can be a jerk and player now?

That's just silly.

You NEED to work on liking who you are, and you need to work on your confidence. THOSE are the only passwords that will make people interested in you.