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Husband sexually frustrated so need info!
Hey every one I am a newlywed I am eighteen and his nineteen yes were are young but we can't help when we fell in love! And no I'm not pregnant lol. We have a little problem though my husband wants sex every day and some time twice a day.. and I don't get in the mood that much and am super tired... I feel so guilty! I don't try as hard as I should but he just wants to come in and have sex right when he gets home and it makes me frustrated because he excepts me to just drop every thing and be in the mood then at that point I don't want sex at all :( I must sound like an awful wife but sometimes I get sore after we have sex and I'm not a little women I'm 5'7 and weigh 145 it hurt at the begin and sometime we finish anyway and it leaves me sore all day and sometimes into the next day! With these two thing my husband gets sexualy frustated at me.. he is not all about sex don't get me wrong he is a great guy! Please help me out you
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 Originally Posted by newlywed801
How many times a day do you have sex? How stimulated are you? How gentle is he? In my experience most 19 year old boys don't have the patience to properly stimulate their partner, they're more concerned about getting themselves off. Also, if you're new to sex, doing it a few times a day is going to leave you sore, especially without proper stimulation. Sounds to me like he's just too rough, not properly preparing you to accept him and not really understanding how a woman's body works. As for fulfilling his needs, how about fulfilling your own? Do you know how your body works? Do you masturbate? Do you enjoy sex? |
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Your best bet is to communicate better I think, tell him about all your thoughs about this continual sex wantings of his. Hey I'm 18 and I want sex all the time to but I wouldn't dream of continuing to do it if it was hurting someone I love. There are plenty of other ways of making him get his rocks off without it hurting you in any way. My thoughs are that maybe he's just thinking of his own needs in this and not yours, and yes he might be a great guy and all that but when it comes to sex, most guys don't think with there main brain and so forget about the other person they love and only thing of themselves. And maybe both of you need to go to some sex counsellor or something because personally I feel he needs some coaching on how to please a woman, and not just himself. Well that's my 2 cents worth... good luck. |
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In addition to agreeing with everything Alty says (but have to spread the rep), if you think you're being a bad wife because of this, you're going to end up very unhappy in this marriage. You seem to have a low opinion of yourself, as though you and your needs don't matter. That's one sided. You need to be understanding of his needs, sure, but it's a two-way street and he has to be understanding of you also. And if you're sore, you're sore, and continuing to give in might just keep making things worse. There's nothing wrong with giving in occasionally when you're not in the mood, but again, it's a two-way street. Sometimes he also has to be the one to give -- that is, not getting it sometimes when he wants it. Tell him to go masturbate if he needs it that badly. My concern is your attitude that somehow you're the bad one in this. Sex is about two people who give to each other, not one person always giving in to fulfill the other person's needs. It's not your job to be ready and waiting every time he wants it. I feel like you'll just end up unhappy and giving in to him the rest of your life if you don't think about yourself here. Males that age are generally immature. But you're going to have to find a way to talk to him and make sure he respects that you are half of this marriage. In other words, I don't think the main issue here is sex. |
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Originally Posted by newlywed801
You say you enjoy sex. What do you enjoy about it? How can you hope to tell him what you like when you don't even know? Sex is something that takes practice. Nobody becomes a pro the first time out. But, there are things you can do to better the experience. It's your body, you're in charge of your own pleasure. You're still young, so is he. Talk to him, tell him how you feel, don't make him guess. Also, sex isn't the only way to give someone pleasure. ;) |
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Originally Posted by Altenweg
Masturbation - Psychology Wiki Newlywed, do the two of you indulge in oral stimulation, as Alty asked? |
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