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Andrewlovestiff · Nov 5, 2012, 10:45 PM

All right so I am not sure if this question will be perceived as something I should be legitimately concerned about or I'm overthinking about this too much. All right so I'm 17 and I met my girlfriend and before her I had never really had any other real relationship (I am also a virgin).

Ok so before me she had dated one guy and she was madly in love with him and had sex with him one time. So she has only had sex once. I mean OK that doesn't sound too bad I guess but him and her were in a horrible car accident where he ended up dying... and ever since she met me I've made her the happiest girl in the world and she loves me and would do anything for me.

It just kills me knowing she was with another guy knowing I have never done that with anyone. And not only that but if he had not have died they could have lasted forever. I usually keep quiet about it to her because I know it hurts her bringing up her past because she knows it hurts me. But I am always thinking about it. If anything sexual comes up or just intimate things in general I always think like she's has already shared this with someone else. And I'm just her special 2nd time and I'm not her first and only like I plan on being for her.

Please help any feedback would be appreciated :)

talaniman · Nov 5, 2012, 11:05 PM

Relax guy, as you get older and more experienced, then chances are it will not even be a big deal to you about a partners past. Just keep those thoughts and insecurities and preoccupation about it to yourself and under control, and don't let it interfer with how you treat her, or your behavior.

blondegirl22 · Nov 5, 2012, 11:16 PM

If you really want to be with her then you need to get past this. She cannot change the past, and maybe she would still be with this guy, but maybe she wouldn't. You can't keep asking "what if" and just do what is. You are with her and are making her happy, that is all you can ask for. There is no secret time machine to go back and change things, you will either have to accept it and get over it or break up over something she can't change.

Fr_Chuck · Nov 5, 2012, 11:55 PM

If you really love her, the past means nothing, it sounds like perhaps you are just not mature enough for a real relationship. As you get older, you will date girls who may have been with many men. First you don't ask or talk about it. In the other after you have sex with her, then if you break up and meet someone new, what do you want them to think about you