[Hannaxo]

I'm writing here, because I really need some help. I’m at my wits end, no one is listening to me, no one around me understands... and I’m feeling awful. About 2 years ago, I met the most wonderful guy ever. I have never been so in love. He was the bassist in one my favorite bands, adored the very ground I walked on. We spoke every day, called each other every day (he lived 30 miles away) and saw each other every moment we could. Then, he was due to go on tour and went out with the band members the night before, I picked him up, dropped him home. Then he text me the next morning, telling me he had slept with someone else, some girl he knew. I was devastated.

Having had depression in my early teens, it triggered it off again (I think) even though I forgave him. Although I was more in love than anything, and we pretty much forgot about the whole cheating thing, I became more and more depressed. I cried every day, felt awful about myself, contemplated suicide. He stayed throughout, telling me he loved me, and supported me through everything. We split up for a week when I told I wasn’t good enough, but he slept in his tour van outside my house until I realized what I’d done. We stayed together for another month and a half, until one day, he broke up with me, telling me he couldn’t take my depression anymore. I was devastated.

We spoke every day from the August we broke up, till the Christmas time, where we slept together. He told me, "He’d get back with me, but was scared what people would think." we continued to talk, until I found he was going out with a girl I knew this February. We still talked occasionally, but I would see him on nights out, and we'd flirt, and at one point I genuinely thought we'd get back together, until he'd apparently told a mutual friend that his new girlfriend was "twice the girl I’d ever be" he later apologized for this, and said it wasn’t true, but it has destroyed me.

My depression has got even worse. At the end of June this year, I’d lost my job, lost the guy I’d loved. I couldn’t sleep, couldn’t eat, and couldn’t imagine my life without him. I went to the area where we used to lived together by the sea, stood on a cliff, rang him, and told him I was going to end my life. He was told me I was annoying him, and rang my family to alert them. Luckily a friend came to get me, and I have been on antidepressants since.

A week later, it was my birthday, and I and my friends went out together. He turned up at my party uninvited, and we ended up outside his house, where he hugged me, and told me he didn’t love his new girlfriend etc. I went home crying. A few days later we both went to the same rock concert. He ignored me. I got extremely drunk on my medication, rang him telling him I was again going to end my life. He has changed his phone number, and I haven’t spoken to him since.

That was a month ago. I’m trying to turn my life around, we all have the same friends, so I’m trying to stay away, but it’s hard. Everything I do reminds me of him, I don’t get what was so wrong with me... it’s a vicious circle of being depressed because he broke up with me, because I was depressed. Someone please help. I just want to either sort myself out and get him back... or move on.

[ahliya]

Listen dear I isn't alone there OK
Am ahliya you won't blv but I am going through the same situation that I cnt get over my ex bf:/

It was my 1st relation ever
And aftr our brk up I dicide nt ever to get in any relation
But I wasn't physicly in relation with bt still v whr in relation 4 lng

After v brok up he has mved on so mch I just don't know what to do hw to mve on:'(
M stuck and he's my close cousin I see him mny times
He's so happy he has so mny relations wit other women's but I don't know why do I care:'(
I just want help hw to forget about him:'( I doint love him bt still I don't know y

Well dear don't stress your slf for that guy
B calm for 1ce please forget him I know its esy sayng but hard doing
As I am going to the same situation so I cn deeply undrstnd :'(

Dear I really know if v ask som1 what should I do now dey say just forget everythn and move on
And I feel to punch him like the hell if it was so easy I would

V r same don't know what to say now:/:(

[talaniman]

You haven't talk to him in a year? How old are you now? Are you in therapy for the depression?

[Hannaxo]

You haven't talk to him in a year? How old are you now? Are you in therapy for the depression?

We split up a year ago.. I haven't spoken to him in a month now. I'm 21. I'm on a waiting list to go see a therapist, but its taking too long. :(

Quote by ahliya
Listen dear I isn't alone there OK
Am ahliya you won't blv but I am going through the same situation that I cnt get over my ex bf:/

Aww hope you're okay.. I hope things get better for us both. Heartbreak isn't nice at any age :(

[talaniman]

Very hard for the healing process to begin until you have accepted that not only has this relationship ended but you must have no more contact with him what so ever. Just talking to him can only keep false hope alive and the hurt fresh in your heart.

That could well mean a complete make over of your social life so he cannot talk to you. You have to focus on yourself for a while, and family and friends that make you happy, and love and support you. You cannot allow him to keep feeding your hurt, nor make him such an important part of your life.

That's how the moving on process starts, with acceptance, and making your well being a priority. Do you drink? Alcohol is a depressant, and makes the condition worse, not better.

Follow this link and read the stickies to see how others have moved on, and coped with the hurt of a break up,

Relationships - Ask Me Help Desk

Good luck with your therapist, and keep your regular doctor updated as to your immediate needs.

[Hannaxo]

I haven't drank now for a month, I'm hoping to stay sober as long as possible. I have an appointment with a therapist on Monday, thank you.

Very hard for the healing process to begin until you have accepted that not only has this relationship ended but you must have no more contact with him what so ever. Just talking to him can only keep false hope alive and the hurt fresh in your heart.

That could well mean a complete make over of your social life so he cannot talk to you. You have to focus on yourself for a while, and family and friends that make you happy, and love and support you. You cannot allow him to keep feeding your hurt, nor make him such an important part of your life.

Thats how the moving on process starts, with acceptance, and making your well being a priority. Do you drink? Alcohol is a depressant, and makes the condition worse, not better.

Follow this link and read the stickies to see how others have moved on, and coped with the hurt of a break up,

Relationships - Ask Me Help Desk

Good luck with your therapist, and keep your regular doctor updated as to your immediate needs.