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    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #1

    Mar 2, 2007, 08:36 AM
    TGIF finally
    Water Formula

    Little Johnny's teacher asks, "What is the chemical formula for water?"

    Little Johnny replies, "H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O!!"

    The teacher, puzzled, asks, "What on Earth are you talking about?"

    Little Johnny replies, "Yesterday you said it was H to O!"






    Travel Agent Terms

    Old world charm - Room with no TV, radio and only 1 light.
    Tropical - Rainy.
    Majestic setting - A long way from town, at end of dirt road.
    Options galore - Nothing is included in the price.
    Secluded hideaway - Directions to locate unclear.
    Some budget rooms - Sorry, already occupied.
    Explore on your own - At your own expense.
    Minutes From?? - By Plane
    Romantic - No Phone in room
    Knowledgeable trip hosts - They've flown in an airplane before.
    No extra fees - No extras available.
    Bird Watchers Paradise - Your car's paint will never be the same
    Nominal fee - Outrageous charge.
    Standard - Sub-standard.
    Deluxe - Barely Standard.
    Superior accommodations- One complimentary chocolate, free shower cap.
    All the amenities - Two chocolates, two shower caps.
    Just Like Home - No Maid service.
    Plush - Both top and bottom sheets, bed shakes.
    Gentle breezes - In hurricane alley.
    Light and airy - No air conditioning.
    Picturesque - Theme park nearby.
    24-hour bar - Ice cubes at additional cost (when available).






    Oops

    Astronomers were excited this week at having isolated a brief sound which occurred immediately before the Big Bang.

    Apparently, that sound was "Uh oh."


    Job Interview

    Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Person asked the young Engineer fresh out of MIT, "And what starting salary were you looking for?"

    The Engineer said, "In the neighbourhood of $75,000 a year, depending on the benefit's package."

    The HR Person said, "Well, what would you say to a package of 5-weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every 2 years - say, a red Corvette?"

    The Engineer sat up straight and said, "Wow! Are you kidding?"

    And the HR Person said, "Certainly, ...but you started it."






    Criminal Lawyer

    A man walked into the local Chamber of Commerce of a small town, obviously desperate. Seeing a man at the counter, the stranger asks, "Is there a criminal lawyer in town?"

    To which the man behind the counter immediately quipped, "Yes, but we haven't been able to prove it yet!"
    moomin007's Avatar
    moomin007 Posts: 158, Reputation: 33
    Junior Member
     
    #2

    Mar 2, 2007, 08:54 AM
    :D


    Heheheheheheehhe
    Love it!

    Great start to the weekend!
    Thanks

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