[drummergirl6]

Hey guys I am gay should we say not that, that is the issue but just so we all know what I am talking about. Im currently studying at university and there is this girl I'm really fond of, I've seen her around and I know her vaguely through a friend of mine as they are both on the football team together. She looks stunning and I'm really interested in getting to know her more, I have chipped in a few things in conversation when my friend and her have been talking but nothing like a 1 on 1 chat, I've kind of took the first step and messaged her on Facebook as I don't have her number or anything like that, she has replied to me and we had a quick chat and then she said she would message me Friday as she has gone camping with her friends and signal is poor. She makes me very nervous and I have never been nervous about speaking to a girl or asking a girl if they want to meet up. Im not sure how to approach this situation id love to get to know her but I'm not very good as this chatting up stuff. My past girlfriends have been friends before hand. Any advice on this would be great thank you

[dragonbaby914]

The waiting game is the worse feeling in the world sweetie but sometimes that is what we have to do, you did the right steps to take slowly in action. Well, like you said she was going camping with friends so she might not have the greatest signal, if you have her on Facebook maybe send her a nice little email saying "I hope you had fun on your camping trip with your friends how was it?" and she if she responds, I totally understand about making the right move & making the first step is hard but show who you truly are, being gay is hard to express to the world but to other people that are gay it is a lot easier.

[drummergirl6]

If she does not message me Friday do I give it a day or two to ask if she has a good time? And she is gay as well so its not like she straight as is off limits that way. I just feel very nervous, if I do end up talking to her when is the best time to ask for her number ?

[dragonbaby914]

I mean if you want to get to know her better maybe you can ask her to go out for a cup of coffee, the slow stuff might work better then rushing it may make you nervous but if you do it you will never know how to start things communicating is the best way.

[drummergirl6]

That's what I'm really nervous about, asking her out for a drink or something. When would be the best time to do this and is there any advise on how I can go about not feeling so nervous about her, it's the first time a girl has made me this nervous. I know confidence is key but I don't want to end up talking crap and not knowing what to say as I'm nervous

[dragonbaby914]

Well, I am glad you went after a girl that feels the same way because if she was bisexual or straight it would be a messy ending. If she doesn't not email you Friday yes give it a day or two, you will feel nervous everyone does if you are straight, lesbian, or bisexual it happens to all of us hon, if you do get in contact with this girl wait and see how the conversations go first then if they go well she if she gives you her number first if not just wait, a little longer

[drummergirl6]

OK thank you, I will try chatting to her for a while first see how it goes and then ill ask, and maybe ask her our for a drink. :D

[dragonbaby914]

I know how you totally feel about the nervous feeling. Confidence is one key but not all the answers to everything just be yourself around her start small talk like how was your day then pick up the conversation even if you do get choked up just explain to her how you feel, don't sound obsessive just be polite and say for example: I am nervous because you give me the butterflies if she says why? Say how you honestly feel gently.

[dragonbaby914]

It will get easier I hope things work out for you if you need anything else I'm here.

[drummergirl6]

I guess I shall have to see how it all goes I will try the slow approach, as I know rushing things never work. Also when would you suggest is the right time to tell someone you like them, or are really interested in them

[dragonbaby914]

I hope I helped :)

[dragonbaby914]

Well, let's see how the conversation goes & if it goes smoothly see how she acts & treats you, You can slowly hint that you are interested in her if everything goes well like the emailing & chatting. Then, if you go on a coffee date or where ever even just a walk in the park & lunch or something goes well then go ahead.

[drummergirl6]

Thanks you have been more than helpful, she seems very out of my league I think that my be why I am nervous

[dragonbaby914]

Hon, honestly we all think that way but you may be surprised that over time she might like you or is interested in you just like you are with her. You may be nervous but to be honest time helps. Being gay is hard to express in general to the world but once you express yourself don't be scared just go out there and go for the jump to catch this girl's eye or attention. But, also being nervous is normal you will feel that way for a little bit but as time goes on it will get easier maybe try not to think about it as a date or a girl you like think of it as two friends going to hang out that might help.

[drummergirl6]

Yeah I guess I could think like that, being gay isn't the problem I'm out and proud and I have no problems with people knowing who I am :D

[dragonbaby914]

GOOD girl that is what I like to hear stand for your right with no shame! It might work and I hope it does.

[drummergirl6]

Thank you, been out since I was 16 I am now 21. Ive had the ups and downs but I'm happy and I have great friends and family. Just need the one lady :D thank you for all your help

[dragonbaby914]

Your quite welcome I wish I had understanding family & friends but I will get over it I am standing proud & that one lady will come it just takes time.
Anything you need I am here.
& I understand.

[drummergirl6]

I'm sure your family and friends will get use to it some time, glad to see another standing tall :D

[dragonbaby914]

If they don't understand it isn't my problem it is there's I am proud & not backing down at all. See, I don't have much friends but the ones I do have they understand but family doesn't which I am fine with that.