 |
|
|
 |
New Member
|
|
Feb 28, 2012, 06:19 AM
|
|
My girlfriend says she loves me but is not in love with me - do I give it time?
My girlfriend broke up with my a week ago after saying she's not 'in love with me' but still loves me.
Now, the last few months I've had an absolutely terrible time. My grandparent died, I've been suffering from depression, and being a serious long distance runner - I also got injured and haven't been able to run for a month or so. I was also attacked and mugged a month ago.
Basically - things haven't been going well for me. Before all this started to happen (Christmas time) things were great with us and we were really in love. But, being the stupid idiot I am I tried to keep a lot of how things have been affecting me recently from her, and I think I started to take things out on the relationship (creating problems, trying to convince myself I didn't love her etc) and I think it eventually just got too much from her.
I know she still loves me, but I'm not sure what to do. I told her about all of this stuff after we broke up, and I said I need some time to sort my head out and become 'me' again, but I don't think that's something I can simply achieve, I think it's something I need to be mindful of, always.
What should I do? How long should I leave it before I talk to her? I know in this situation I should wait for her to come back to me - but I know full well I'm the one that messed things up, so the onus is on me.
I know I need to give her space; but I'm so desperate to prove that things can be different - and I really don't want to end up leaving it too long...
Please help.
Anthony
|
|
 |
Expert
|
|
Feb 28, 2012, 08:11 PM
|
|
Leave her alone guy, and get your own act together. When you get dumped you don't pursue even harder and make things worse. You leave them alone and do your own thing. If they change their minds the onus is on them, to find you, and not you to fix things.
Sorry, not the magic advise you wanted to hear. But bow out gracefully, and keep your dignity, and self respect.
|
|
 |
New Member
|
|
Mar 5, 2012, 06:48 PM
|
|
My opinion is to talk to her about everything you held back from her near the end of your relationship, tell her exactly how you feel, and that you believe it was yourself that drove you guys apart, but don't use this with intentions to get back with her. If she does still love you, she will listen to what you have to say and sympathize with you. As for getting back with her, time will have to heal that. Lay everything on the table for her to see, then it will have to be left up to her whether she sees your making steps towards becoming yourself again.
BTW I'm very sorry for your recent losses and heartache... I hope things work out for you
|
|
 |
Ultra Member
|
|
Mar 5, 2012, 06:54 PM
|
|
Yes, you give it forever. She has broken up with you, and has done it gracefully as any girl that cares about you does. But that doesn't mean get your hopes up and wait for her to come back. Her decision has been made, respect it, keep yourself busy, and start moving on. If she comes back, great, at that moment you will have a choice. For now, you need to leave her alone, and start living your life as a single man again, enjoy. ;)
For your next relationship, remember that no one likes to be used as an emotional crutch.
|
|
 |
New Member
|
|
Jun 6, 2012, 06:48 AM
|
|
Hey there, I'm very sorry to hear about all the bad things that happened at once for you. I really feel for you as the same thing happened to me only about a week ago. Im so upset at the moment and I think about her everyday but I realised it takes two people to create a relationship and obviously there were reasons for my ex to do what she did. I said to myself it doesn't matter what it is and I don't need to know why because she left. If she wants to came back then she will. No one can make her. I'm a person who doesn't force anyone to be with me. I'm doing the No Contact and I'm doing my own things its making me feel better, its early days but I think ill get there, hope everything works out for you. All the best.
|
|
Question Tools |
Search this Question |
|
|
Check out some similar questions!
My girlfriend said she needs time and space but she still loves me
[ 11 Answers ]
I was dating a girl for 16 months things we were great. I meant her 2 summers ago. She lived in pittsburgh at the time with her mom but her dad lived in the same town I did 3 hrs north of pitt. She was visiting her dad that summer when we meant. We meant when she got a job where I worked. Right...
Girlfriend says she loves me and needs time? What does that mean?
[ 34 Answers ]
My girlfriend of a year and two months has broken up with me. It's been almost two weeks since she's broken up with me and she say's that she just needs time and that she doesn't know what she wants right now. Every now and then she would text me that she misses me and that she loves me. Just last...
Girlfriend doesn't love me - Give it more time?
[ 7 Answers ]
I’m a middle aged divorced guy who has been with Jen for 4 1/2 years. She is two years younger than me. I’m trying to decide if this relationship should continue or not. The issue is, she has never said she loves me. A year ago she said that she cares about me, but does not love me. Yet she...
He loves me and I love him but he got to girlfriend what do I do?
[ 4 Answers ]
Hi ma name is 123455 and I have a problem OK my ex is like now my best friends bt we have confessed 2 each other that we still got feelings 4 each other still bt da problem is that he has a girlfriend and he doesn't want 2 hurt her and neither do I what do I do? I'm sooooo confused!! PLEASE HELP!!...
View more questions
Search
|