[marcus83]

Ive been in a long distance relationship that started over the internet nine months ago with a girl that's in medical school. The first six months or so were amazing, the last two months however have not exactly been the best, when I would fly up there to see her, I was always edgy and not all kisses if you know what I mean, I couldn't understand why, but now I think I do, I just wasn't happy knowing I was only going to get to see her for just a few days, and have to say goodbye again. I didn't appreciate the fact that she was just around I was pissed and frustrated that I knew she was leaving again.. That bieng said, the last two months, when we got in some arguments, I " broke up" with her three times.
Of course five hours after breaking up with her, I told her I was sorry and I had to have her back, well the forst two times she said okay, and the last time she told me not to do it again, and I did. Now she says that she wants space, and that were not back together, and there are a few things I need to change about my temper/personality. She said that I have to prove to her that I won't just say anything, just to get what I want. And she's right, I realize that now... I really want to spend the rest of my life with this girl, and she thought she wanted to also, until I hurt her three times. I wasn't a bad boyfriend I don't think, I brought a teacup puppy up to her and surprised her, our conversations were great for the most part, and she knows I love her. I was just an idiot and frustrated with the distance, but realize now that I may have pushed away the best person I've ever met. Ive been terrible, TERRIBLE with giving her space, I've probably left 20 terrible voicemails on her phone, ones saying how much I love her, otherones saying that I hate her for wanting this space from me and I want to pick the puppy up, and that I can't believe I gave such a ty person such a nice gift. In the past two weeks, I can't eat, all that stuff. Ive never felt more terrible in my life, everyother girl I've ever been with wasn't anything special, I cut them off and didn't care,. but this one is special. And now she's sending me emails saying how much easier it is for her to study, now she's at the top of her medical class. And how her "peers are embrasing her" whatever the hell that means. We've talked like three times, nice conversation, she says that she still wants to know me as a person, and she does. This girl is very direct, no games, no nothing. With what I've told you all, here's my question, should I keep talking to her "as friends" and hope that she can tell that I've "changed," or should I stop answering her calls and do what all of my friends are telling me, and leave her alone? How can she want to be "friends" and still want to "know me somehow?" If she tells me about going out with another guy or anything I'm going to lose my mind. Her "peers are embraseing her?" what does all this mean? I really don't think that she's letting me down easy, but she said that its going to take a lot for me to prove that I won't hurt her again. How can I prove that to her if were not together? And she's 1500 miles away? PS. Also keep in mind that flew down & spent christmas with my family, and all that stuff, we really do have a short, but serious relationship.

[talaniman]

Can you blame her for being suspicious and cautious? You acted badly and she has every right to protect herself from you immaturity. Back off and stop being so insecure. That's your problem not hers. Talk to her like a real person who can deal maturely with the problems a long distance relationship has to go through. Also after 9 months you are really on the verge of getting to know some one so slow down and start being about fun and save that serious stuff for much later. Act like a mature an and she will receive you as such.

[PatrickG]

I met a girl on the internet and went through something similar. But we are still together and I love her!do you know why? I never met her once for 6 months and got to know the real her without any sexual innuendo or anything. If you got to know the real her then you should have enough respect for her to realise that you are hurting her. Yes stay friends with her and maybe she will see that you have copped onto the fact that you are about to lose the most amazing thing you will probably ever get. And her peers embracing her only means that they are congradulating her on her success. So stop pushing her away, whatever emotional or commitment problems you have sort them out. You will regret it if you don't!

[DogLover62]

Well it seems you don't know what you want.You broke up with her 3 times so how can she trust you saying that you love her and want to spend the rest of your life with her. She's obviously fed up with the way you've been acting towards her and its not fair for her. You need to find how you feel before you you say you love her. Do not ignore her because that is going to make her even more mad and upset at you. Do not send her anymore nasty e-mails just talk about regular stuff do not bring up how much you love her until it's the right time. Maybe one day if she still is single and your still talking to her and she's saying stuff like how she's going to be free for a couple of days but she has no one to spend it with or something like that. Drive up to where she is and surprise her. Not with a gift because then its like your buying her love only give her maybe a rose or a boocay of flowers with a sweet little card and leave it at her door and ring the doorbell and run. Having the card say something like turn around and you be right behind her or call me and then the ring on your phone she will be able to hear and you step out infroont of her or something like that. Just surprise her but sweetly. It might show her how much you love her.

Im no expert so don't quote me on any of this

DogLover62