[garygibby]

k well I'm having this problem of not wanting sex and I'm not cheating or anything else porn strippers etc my wife is ten years younger and really sexy but I don't want sex to the point it bothers her *** should I do ? What can I do I am a recovering addict and I used tons and tons of drugs heroin cocaine etc my x gfs were either escorts or strippers and I had tons of sex partners and a very un normal sex life during that period I could say I have sewn my outs at the least I don't usually feel jealous or insecure or if I am never show it and sex has never been allowed to run my show self control was nessasary for me to get what I wanted back in addiction being whipped wasn't either I want my wife happy but find I just have no interest in sex I work very hard mentally and physically have 3 kids and a very fu*&ed up past could it be the drugs I did ruined me ? I'm almost 5 years clean could it be I've had my fill ? Or what? She is so sad and stressed and blames herself and thinks I may be cheating I took my vows seriously and would never stray ever *** should I do?it doent matter to me but it bothers her she thinks if she was more tanned or had a tighter but etc I would want more but she could be cristina augulara for all I care I still isn't into it right now maybe later .oh by the way it does work just not thinking on using it. . Please someone real try to help.

[Cat1864]

Did you meet your wife before or after you got clean? If after, how much of your past does she know?

How old are you and have you been to the doctor to get a complete physical and discuss the long term effects that your addiction might have caused? Have you had your hormone levels checked?

Have you looked into why you became addicted in the first place. I ask because sometimes drug use can be a symptom of a problem such as Depression. You may have ditched the symptom but not dealt with the main cause.

How much stress is in your life and how tired are you? Two very big libido limiters. You say you have three children. Is part of your brain concerned about pregnancy or the children walking in?

Have you tried taking a vacation with your wife to spend time alone and see if getting away from the daily stress helps?

Do you get time together to relax and allow yourself to think about sex? Do the two of you spend any time talking about fantasy and turn ons getting your thoughts headed in that direction rather than just expecting the thoughts to be there?

On some level are you holding back those thoughts because you don't want to think about your past and what you did before? In your mind do sex and drugs go together?

[JudyKayTee]

Out of greenies but GREAT, comprehensive answer!

I was just going to say, "Speak to a Doctor and have a physical."

Excellent post!

[Helpful_guy]

I agree with CAT... try to relax. Don't think too much. GO on a vacation and see a doctor