[paulette123]

I'm a 62 yrs old and a female. I was born in Oakland Ca. I want to find my real mother,but I know nothing about here or where to start. How can I find her with out costing me an arm and leg?

[Synnen]

That's really going to depend on how computer savvy your biological mother is, and whether she ever told anyone else about you (so that her other children might search.

I detest the word "real" when associated with a parent. Any parent that loved you enough to try to make decisions that would be in your best interest is a "real" parent--whether that's the parent that chose adoption so that you would have a happy stable home or whether it's the mother who held you through nightmares and kissed your boo-boos, or whether it's the aunt or grandmother that you could run to when things at home weren't that good (and what child hasn't wanted gramma more than mom at some point?). My point is that there's no such thing as an "imaginary" parent, so there can't be any such thing as a "real" parent. They're ALL real.

Anyway, unless you have a medical reason, the courts aren't going to open your adoption file.

I always suggest that people try reunion websites. Probably the best place to start is with ISRR, followed by adoption.com and adoption.org. It's free to list your information, and if there is a match, you are informed of it.