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    Vickjames17's Avatar
    Vickjames17 Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Aug 2, 2009, 08:21 PM
    Need guidance girlfriend or me that has the issues?
    Me and my girl have fallen in love with each other and have been good intill I came back from the beach and her ex and his friend that was down at the beach said I cheated on her down there, so the night they td her that I was getting drunk with my friends and she called me freaking out when she was at a party those guys were at and they told her I cheated on her, so I went to where she was staying to tell her it wasn't true and she ended up scratching me and cutting me with her nails when she was slapping me everywhere, and I was holding her hands to keep her from beating my and she said she's afraid and never felt like that before in her life, I didn't hit her or anything and she's freaking out, and is now with her ex saying he was there for her when all this happened, and all she says now is she just wants to be happy, I try and work it out with her and it seems like she doesn't want to. She still tells me she loves ne she just wants to be happy, and I can clearly see she's not in love or happy with this other guy. It's been two weeks now, what do I do? She still loves me but what do I say to fix all of this?
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
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    #2

    Aug 2, 2009, 08:28 PM
    Hi.how old are you?violence is never acceptable in any form. Please take a step back and try to understand what your true relationship needs are.
    Vickjames17's Avatar
    Vickjames17 Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Aug 2, 2009, 08:35 PM

    Im 18 and I know violence isn't right that's why I just held her hands from keeping her from doing that, it ddnt hurt I'm big enough to take it, but we are truly in love I just don't know why she's being afraid if being with me when she still told me she loves me andnits just hard for her
    inertia's Avatar
    inertia Posts: 308, Reputation: 60
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    #4

    Aug 2, 2009, 08:42 PM

    Hello drama. If (and why would you) you really want her to come back, stop trying. Stop feeding her soap opera with dialogue. If she makes any attempt to reconcile, tell her you don't have time to play a role in her romance novel. Don't waste any more precious oxygen trying to convince her of anything. If she had half a brain, she wouldn't believe her EX. Either that, or it's an excuse to dump you without being the bad guy. Walk the hell away. Trust me, this is a game.
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #5

    Aug 2, 2009, 08:42 PM

    You have to accept that she choose her ex over you. She choose to believe him over you. She went crazy at you instead of giving you a chance to tell your side.

    Sounds like you are better off without her.
    If she can be like this you saw her true colors and that could be just a piece of what she is capable of.

    I wouldn't put any stock in her saying she loves you if she can't even back it up with explaining herself and her motives.
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
    Jobs & Parenting Expert
     
    #6

    Aug 2, 2009, 08:50 PM

    You will do more to get her back if you have absolutely no contact with her and if you totally ignore her for a couple more weeks (at least). That will give both you and her time to think this through. If she's that gullible and has so little faith in you... do you really want her back? What about next time?
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
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    #7

    Aug 2, 2009, 08:54 PM
    That's good advice the previous have given you. Take care.
    Vickjames17's Avatar
    Vickjames17 Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #8

    Aug 3, 2009, 08:52 AM
    K all of yall's advice sound really good,what should I do if she tries to txt or call me though?
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #9

    Aug 3, 2009, 09:16 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Vickjames17 View Post
    K all of yall's advice sound really good,what should I do if she tries to txt or call me though?
    Block her for now. Don't respond.
    Romefalls19's Avatar
    Romefalls19 Posts: 4,739, Reputation: 1130
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    #10

    Aug 3, 2009, 09:23 AM

    Some girlfriend you have to take the word of her EX boyfriend, over the word of her own boyfriend. If she is dumb enough to fall for this scheme, which I like to call "Opportunistic scum masked as knight in shining armor" then I'd let her walk.
    Torrid13's Avatar
    Torrid13 Posts: 637, Reputation: 149
    Senior Member
     
    #11

    Aug 3, 2009, 09:26 AM

    Wow, the description of her clawing at you made me think of a cat with rabies.

    If she REALLY loved you, don't you think she would let you tell your side before trying to claw your eyes out?

    Go find a girl that actually has you on her priority list.
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
    Uber Member
     
    #12

    Aug 3, 2009, 09:26 AM
    Do the N C honey it works. Lol
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #13

    Aug 4, 2009, 02:06 PM
    Get away from that nut case. It's a big red flag that she believes a lying ex over you, and an even bigger red flag that she gets violent before she gets the facts, and the biggest red flag is she is violent. I run for the hills.

    Talaniman rule- Don't ever fool with a fool, who resorts to violence. Just ain't that much love in the world.

    Violence = Abuse.

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