Originally Posted by
JudyKayTee
Steve, I know you research before you post so I'm sure you can answer this. A potential step parent can pretty much file any time. I guess Florida no longer has the "one year in a solid marriage rule?" I can't find it but I'm not doubting you.
But what about a release/Affidavit/permission/waiver (whatever it's called in your area) by the natural father? I realize the Court - under special circumstances - can waive the need for the release.
I won't give you my "would you do brain surgery on yourself" speech because I would be patronizing you - :D (You can also adopt without an Attorney in NY - and possibly every other State. The question is whether the average person has a clue and if all the "i's" are dotted and the "t's" are crossed if the natural parent shows up at some time in the future."
We still need the release signed and notorized by the bio-donor, but he as agreed to this already. We could get it forced since his contact was severed for over 2 years now, but that is not necessary in our case. He was just thrilled to find out he wasn't going to get dinged for back support. Of course what he doesn't realize is that we know where he is now... and as soon as our part with him is done, so will his other exwife, who has been searching for him for 2 years to collect HER back support. :)
I was unable to find anywhere that spoke of the 1 year rule but our lawyer, a family law specialist with 20 years experience in this county and a woman that has adopted 2 young ones herself, assures us that there is no wait. We could get married and adopt on the same day if we so chose. Apparently the court even does all the adoptions on one day and make it nice for the families.
I wouldn't try this without a lawyer, but it was she that told us that we really don't need her help on this. She would, of course, love the business, but she says that they have simplified the process to the point of making her obsolete. She is charging us 1 1/2 hours for the whole thing.
Personally I wouldn't do it without a lawyer either. You like the brain surgery analogy. I prefer something more realistic... wiring electrical equipment. Its not that hard... mostly. You can read about it anywhere. BUt if you do it wrong, there are possibly tragic consequences.
At the end of the day though, I am sure I *could* do it myself. But this is my son we're talking about... I don't care if it costs 10 grand... its my kid. It's a small price tag!