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    TwinkletOes26's Avatar
    TwinkletOes26 Posts: 182, Reputation: 2
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    #21

    Jul 2, 2008, 12:06 PM
    Starfirefly so you think that if a woman has one drink while pregnant not because she can't go without it but because its her birthday or its christmas they should seek help?

    Everyone has their fav thing I know mine to have is a Guinness float (ice cream and Guinness it sounds weird but sooo good) I don't have one everyday but its an indulgence. Others fav thing mabe steak and sheak burgers or starbucks ice latte.

    Im just saying 9 months is a loooooong time not to have your fav thing and I can't say id necessarily be appaulled if I saw pegnant woman with a little half glass of red wine then again I can't say I wouldn't appaulled I'm still on the fence. I just know 9 months is a lonnnng time for me not to have at least one Guinness float ( a little glass of it mostly ice cream which is the way I make it anyway a 1/3 of the can then the rest is ice cream mmmmmm) which is why I don't have kids lol.
    NowWhat's Avatar
    NowWhat Posts: 1,634, Reputation: 264
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    #22

    Jul 3, 2008, 09:05 AM
    9 months is a short amount of time to sacrifice for your child. And it is just the beginning.

    For me personally, I quit smoking 3 months before I planned on being pregnant. Cut ALL caffenine out (which was hard because I like my coffee and Mt. dew) Had to cut sodium out, and no tuna. And of course, no alcohol.
    I didn't take any medication for headaches except for one time and I was having a severe migrain. And my doctor said I could take tylenol.

    I look at this way - the baby can not speak up and tell you they don't need this or that, it is up to YOU to make the right choices. I educated myself to know what was developing inside me and when. When her eyes were developing, I tried to eat more carrots, sounds crazy, but hey...

    I was not going to do anything to put my child in harms way. Period.

    I do get angry when I see a pregnant woman either smoking or drinking. In my mind, that person is not protecting her child. If she can't protect her child now - what is going to happen when that baby is born.
    Again, these are my opinions - right or wrong.

    If you can not sacrifice some of your favorite things for a little while for the sake of the health of your child - then you should not have one until you can.

    My sister nursed her 2nd child - my sister LOVES chocolate. Well, she could not have chocolate for the 15 months that she nursed because it did bad things to her child.
    Point - she did what she had to do to make sure her child got what was best.
    Was it easy? Not for my sister - it was one of the first things she had after she stopped nursing. But she got through it and my niece is healthier for it.
    TwinkletOes26's Avatar
    TwinkletOes26 Posts: 182, Reputation: 2
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    #23

    Jul 3, 2008, 09:58 AM
    [QUOTE]
    Quote Originally Posted by NowWhat
    9 months is a short amount of time to sacrifice for your child. And it is just the beginning.
    9 months is a long time for me to cut out on sushi Guinness floats and wine... I haven't had any Guinness in about a month(bc my mama says no alcohol in her house because it's a "sin" to drink anything alcoholic so I respect her house:rolleyes:) and I'm bummed lol

    I didn't take any medication for headaches except for one time and I was having a severe migrain. And my doctor said I could take tylenol.
    I have acid reflux meds and sinus meds I HAVE to take or I get sick would I have to give those up? Is there a nurse here who would know the answer to this?


    I do get angry when I see a pregnant woman either smoking or drinking. In my mind, that person is not protecting her child. If she can't protect her child now - what is going to happen when that baby is born.
    But I'm sure you don't walk up to her and reprimand her. Ive heard of people reprimanding a pregnant woman about her drinking a cup of coffee. I look at it this way its not me not my baby so I don't care. Its selfish I know but what's me reprimanding her going to do? Nothing but make her angry but she's not going to stop.

    If
    you can not sacrifice some of your favorite things for a little while for the sake of the health of your child - then you should not have one until you can.
    You are right ,but what if the woman's doctor says its OK for her to have whatever it is she wants for example rare steak.


    My sister nursed her 2nd child - my sister LOVES chocolate. Well, she could not have chocolate for the 15 months that she nursed because it did bad things to her child.
    You can't have chocolate while nursing... wow learn something new every day

    All these posting have taught me one thing NO KIDS FOR A LONNNNNNNG TIME for me lol they cost too much and from day one you can't have anymore fun.
    smokedetector's Avatar
    smokedetector Posts: 368, Reputation: 56
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    #24

    Jul 3, 2008, 10:32 AM
    Twinklet,

    I have never heard of not being able to eat chocolate while nursing either. I think it is something that happens to her child, not every child, so because of that SHE can't eat it while breast feeding, not as a general rule.

    Of course I would never repremand a mother for drinking coffee or anything like that. It's not that I would be disgusted if I saw a pregnant woman with a glass of wine, I would maybe just think to myself that I would not choose to do it. It's kind of like people being gay, though I don't mean to delve into another topic here, but I don't mind gay people, it's just not something I would do myself.
    NowWhat's Avatar
    NowWhat Posts: 1,634, Reputation: 264
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    #25

    Jul 3, 2008, 02:48 PM
    Not everyone's child reacts the way my sister's did to chocolate. So that is not a rule or anything. The point of me telling that story was just to say that while my sister LOVES chocolate, she would not eat it because it had a bad effect on the baby. She made a sacrifice.

    And no, I would not actually go up to an expecting mother and say anything - I wish sometimes to find the nerve - but I would not do it. She would, however, get a look.

    If my doctor told me that standing on my head while pregnant was good for the baby and studies have shown it makes them smarter - I have to admit, I would give it a try.

    If the doctor told me that doing this or that could potential harm my child - then I would avoid it all together.

    And there are some medications that have adverse affects and should not be taken while pregnant. So, if you were on one of those - then if I were you, yes I would stop taking it.

    I also look at things like this - just because you CAN do something doesn't always mean you SHOULD.

    And in the span of your life, is 9 months really that long? I have been on this planet for over 30 years - 9 months is a drop in the bucket.


    I have to say this to you, TWINKLET, you KNOW you aren't ready. You know that you are "selfish" when it comes to what you are ready to give up. I commend that. A lot of people don't or won't say that.
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #26

    Jul 3, 2008, 02:54 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by smokedetector
    Twinklet,

    I have never heard of not being able to eat chocolate while nursing either. I think it is something that happens to her child, not every child, so because of that SHE can't eat it while breast feeding, not as a general rule.

    Of course I would never repremand a mother for drinking coffee or anything like that. It's not that I would be disgusted if I saw a pregnant woman with a glass of wine, I would maybe just think to myself that I would not choose to do it. It's kinda like people being gay, though I don't mean to delve into another topic here, but I don't mind gay people, it's just not something I would do myself.

    I think twinkle was just using that as an example. Chocolate can cause problems in SOME children, hyperactivity is one.
    TwinkletOes26's Avatar
    TwinkletOes26 Posts: 182, Reputation: 2
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    #27

    Jul 3, 2008, 07:53 PM
    Chocolate can cause problems in SOME children, hyperactivity is one.
    [/QUOTE]

    Ohhhh so that's why they say you shouldn't eat too much... no problem for me I prefer caramel anyway... what about ice cream? That's another favorite of mine.

    I suppose I ask these questions trying to weigh out if I want a kid or not (later way later down the line). I find myself asking what's the point of having kids they cost a lot of money... money I could use for other things(like a trip to england) and they take up ALL of your time. Studies show (learned this in psych class as well) that marriage satisfaction decreases after having a child and doesn't go up until that child is gone. That makes me wonder again what's the point?
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #28

    Jul 3, 2008, 08:07 PM
    Studies show (learned this in psych class as well) that marriage satisfaction decreases after having a child and doesn't go up until that child is gone. That makes me wonder again what's the point?[/QUOTE]

    Please show me that study. I find that for most couples it is different.
    TwinkletOes26's Avatar
    TwinkletOes26 Posts: 182, Reputation: 2
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    #29

    Jul 3, 2008, 08:45 PM
    J_9 I don't have my psych book that has an official psycholgical study but I have an article I've found :
    Marital satisfaction higher without children? |

    Coaching for more clarity about your goals, values and vision for your life!


    KIDS CAN RUIN MARRIAGE: Top 5 Things You Need to Know by Dr. Joshua Coleman — appreciation, family, money | Gather

    http://pandagon.net/index.php/site/c...eople_happier/

    Hope these help


    I remember hearing this in class and wondering : if it causes low marital satisfaction why do people even bother with kids?
    NowWhat's Avatar
    NowWhat Posts: 1,634, Reputation: 264
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    #30

    Jul 4, 2008, 05:19 AM
    Obviously, kids aren't for everyone. IF you aren't emotionally and mentally ready for them, sure a lot of stress can come with them. Maybe more than the norm.
    Kids are stressful. Why? I think that it is because it is unchartered territory. You are now solely responsible for the well being of someone else. They don't come with rule books, you just have to figure it out. The fear of the unknown is a strong one.

    For me, I knew from a young age that I wanted to be a mother. So when I finally got pregnant, I enjoyed every moment. I can say that I LOVED being pregnant. Having that life growing inside me. I was not going to do anything to harm the child that I had waited so long for.
    When she was born, I focused (maybe to much) on doing everything perfectly. Perfection is hard to find in anything you do. So, I brought a lot of stress on myself. But all I knew/know is that I am responsible for raising this person - I only get one shot at it and I am going to do what is best for her. When I am done, I am sending this adult into the world and I hope that she is all the things I have taught her to be.

    Anyway, did it put stress on my marriage? YES! I would be lying if I said no. When she was first born, I couldn't watch her father feed her. In my mind he wasn't doing it right. He could not do anything as good as me. Call it postpartum, whatever, I was crazy.

    My husband and I are completely different and we bring different things to the table. Both valuable when it comes to teaching and caring for our daughter. No one way is right or wrong, just different. It took me a LONG time to figure that out. Our road was bumpy for a while.

    Is it my child's fault? Absolutely NOT. She didn't ask to be brought into the world with parents that are opposite. Our relationship went through another trial/tribulation.
    We have made it through and we are a stronger parenting team.

    That child has brought more joy and fulfilment into our lives than we could have ever imagined.

    I could go on and on, but I will stop at that... for now. :)
    TwinkletOes26's Avatar
    TwinkletOes26 Posts: 182, Reputation: 2
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    #31

    Jul 4, 2008, 10:01 AM
    As for me now the only kids I want are my two cabbage patch kids lol
    TwinkletOes26's Avatar
    TwinkletOes26 Posts: 182, Reputation: 2
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    #32

    Jul 9, 2008, 03:28 PM
    Miller that is what its called a fetus the scientific term used to refer to what's growing in a woman's body whilst pregnant why is that "rude"

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