[Latincandie]

Fifteen years ago, I dated my present boyfriend but nothing serious happened during that time. It was a platonic relationship! After I separated from my husband, I saw him and it was a click right away. We starting going out and I fell in love really bad. He use to sing song to me, take me to nice places etc. Well, I felt great , but I start observed he was really jealous. I was working for a company as a Production Planner, which take me a lot of my time watching the production constantly. He get really mad if I didn't answer his call or I talk to him for the period he wish. In various occasion I explained him the importance for me to be in the production floor and in management meeting, but he always was upset and he didn't undestand. Well, I get fired for my job and one of the reason it was because of him... I get depressed and he "supposetly"support me, but deep of me I knew he was one of the reason because his constantly pushing caused me more stress in my work area. Also, he always was asking me if someone was hitting on me in the plant or if I was dating before someone... which not.

I can't deny he help me to paid some rent bills, because I didn't have the money for it after I was fired. Also, when it was a disagreenment, I felt he never let me express my point and I stayed quite to not make the situation worse, but in the end I felt frustrated because he couldn't understand my point and how I was feeling. He always used the quote "I am talking with examples and evidence..you dont" or didn't take seriously my feelings. Not only that, when I was trying to express myself he used to told me if I didn't like what he was telling me to hang out and never call him back, or just simple he hang out. Because I love him I called him over and over and cried loud for him.

Then one day I get so mad that I told him I am tired of his stuff and I leave him, but then few days I started missing him and I called him. He used that to make my life miserable, remind me that I left him... In this point, he told me that everything will change... he put me in the situation to accept or not his conditions, which was "no visit his family or friends, to take everything easy". I saw a point in this because he didn't want to keep saying that we came back and next day that we stop see each other. But in that point of our relationship I was ready to no allow anybody interfere with us, so I didn't take it this "condition"seriously until a weekend I stayed in his house. He didn't want me to go with him to see his mother (which I love her a lot), it shocked me but I stayed in his house until he return. Then , it was a boxer fight that night (PPV) and all his friend was planning to get together to watch this fight. I was expecting to go with him and he didn't want me to go with him. THEN, I was really hurt. I told him "why u dont want me to go with you...they are your friends!!??? How many couple fights and get together? Well, he went alone and I did stayed in his house. I felt really bad and when he came back he acted like nothing happened and he asked to have intimacy, but I wasnt in mood. He get mad with me becuase "he told me what was his conditions and I did accept them and now I was getting upset" I did cry that night ! Why he was doing it to me?. Next morning, while we intimated I started crying remember the day before and he knew why I was upset and he didn't asked me or tried to resolve the problem. During the week , I broke up with him , we stayed split for almost 2 months... but again I missed him and I want him be in my life. So I returned to him and he put a lot of conditions because he can't continue dealing with the broke up - return situation. His condicitions is simply like ÿou have to do what I want to and you can't give me crap of nothing, so that if I don't agree with him I must to keep quite. And I can't do that! I told him that in the same way he don't want his family knows about us been together I will NOT put my kids in the spot. He get mad and start fight. Is easy for him put conditions but when I did use the same conditions with my kids he didn't like it. So, when I told him how I am feeling he get angry and kept me for a 1 1/2 hrs telling me without give me change to talk, his point and why I am ungrateful after he take me back... like he is doing a favor to me! He keep saying that he is been humillated it by me, that I did a show each time I cried and told him that I love him, that he is giving me so much and I don't, blah blah, blah. I think I am been manipulated from him and he was using emotional sabotage to make me do wherever he wants to. I did love him but I must to love me more!

[rod79]

Kick his to the curb. There are enough men to meet a decent one.

[Latincandie]

kick his to the curb. there are enough men to meet a decent one.

That is exactly what other people is telling me, the Nun, his sister, my family and friends. Also his sister told me, I am too much for him because he is using emotional abuse with me and I don't deserve that. He kept ask me over and over if I slept with someone else or if someone is been hitting on me stuff like that. I get tired of it and I told him, but he doesn't understand he is doing something that is affecting the relationship.

We broke up on August of 2007, I thought that maybe he will look after me but he didn't. So, like a good stupid and in love one , I called him and he didn't answer so I left a message in his voice mail. When he decided to answer me back , it was with actitute and conditions. Also, he kind of mocking me with the voice mail I left because I was crying really bad. But or reconsiliation wasn't for to long... when he notices I am not agree with his argument or his thoughts he get angry and start to throw me stuff to make me feel bad. I get mad again... and he told me that why I was looking for him to do the same sh... and I won the Nobel Prize for the best act/show for the message I left in his voice mail. Well, in the end he hung up on me and sent me a text message telling me "next time go cry to maternity..." Very despicable comment, knowing that I was very sincere with him in my feelings.

Right now , I am working in forget about him because he only thinks about what he wants , likes and do without think in other side of the relationship.

[s_cianci]

You've got yourself a jealous, insecure control freak who just wants to keep you under ball and chain for his own convenience. Why you would ever miss him or want him back after you were free of him is beyond me. But as long as you keep tolerating and allowing this behavior it is never going to change. You really are better off without him. The next time you leave him, which'll be soon I hope, make it permanent. He's only making your life miserable and even caused you to lose a job!

[Latincandie]

You've got yourself a jealous, insecure control freak who just wants to keep you under ball and chain for his own convenience. Why you would ever miss him or want him back after you were free of him is beyond me. But as long as you keep tolerating and allowing this behavior it is never going to change. You really are better off without him. The next time you leave him, which'll be soon I hope, make it permanent. He's only making your life miserable and even caused you to lose a job!

That is what exactly did... I broke up with him!! I realize he really didn't even care about my feelings... because when someone love you NEVER will mocking you of the way you are crying or what are you saying with your heart...

I thought after the last broke up he will realize his behavior , but he consider himself like he is doing everything right and I am doing everything wrong. And that is the first mistake he is doing! Right now, I am trying to concentrate myself in forget about him and dealing to get over his manipulations.

Is increible how hard you can hit the bottom when you felt in love..!

[Latincandie]

Latincandie-That is what exactly did... I broke up with him!! I realize he really didn't even care about my feelings... because when someone love you NEVER will mocking you of the way you are crying or what are you saying with your heart...

Also, I did notices he was not that compromise with our relationship... he just want to continue have intercourse with me without a serious compromise. And I am not a game to play with it! Now, I know when he don't receive any calls or any kind of contact from me he will freak out... because I was always the one looking for him and he take advantage of it.. (my bad!) But, you learn everyday...

[talaniman]

Kicking the BUM to the curb, and KEEPING him out of your life, will solve your problems. That, and a good job, and a life you enjoy.