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    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
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    #121

    Sep 8, 2009, 11:00 AM
    What next indeed?you ve tried two ways of communicating with her and neither got a response.she s moved on is my take on this.sorry.
    harriejansen's Avatar
    harriejansen Posts: 126, Reputation: 16
    Junior Member
     
    #122

    Sep 8, 2009, 02:19 PM

    She answered my mail: Hi, thanks for the info, regards, F

    Now that is a short answer! Tomorrow I'll try to call again.
    twomommyshell's Avatar
    twomommyshell Posts: 8, Reputation: 2
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    #123

    Sep 8, 2009, 02:30 PM

    There must be a reason there is trust issues. You must consider your partner when being in a relationship. Trust is everything. Giving up to easy is not good ether relationships take allot of work.
    harriejansen's Avatar
    harriejansen Posts: 126, Reputation: 16
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    #124

    Sep 10, 2009, 11:55 AM

    So far attempts to contact have been futile... I feel OK anyway, doing a lot of sports etc.

    Just sent her a sms: Hi I am in town these days maybe we can have a drink, would like to meet again

    And she silent... I drove past her house, she is in town, but what can I do?
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
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    #125

    Sep 10, 2009, 12:41 PM

    Not a lot the ball s in her court and either she gets in touch or she doesn't.its that simple.
    harriejansen's Avatar
    harriejansen Posts: 126, Reputation: 16
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    #126

    Sep 11, 2009, 03:35 AM

    Well, I have my answers! I tried to call her today, she didn't answer, so I called again and then sent her a message, please answer, she then sent me a message: what part of me not wanting to see you or talk to you do you not understand! And don't dare to come here because I will take measures.

    ?? Well, I needed this to be able to move on. I am flabbergasted really by so much agressiveness. Thanks guys!
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
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    #127

    Sep 11, 2009, 04:55 AM

    There s your answer and now you can get your life back for real.all the best.
    harriejansen's Avatar
    harriejansen Posts: 126, Reputation: 16
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    #128

    Sep 12, 2009, 06:12 AM

    Wauw today I am having a really bad day... it is true that contact sets you back...

    I can still not grasp why she is so aggressive, guess I shouldn't think about it and get myself back on my feet again, really hard today.
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
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    #129

    Sep 12, 2009, 06:29 AM
    Yes feeling the way you are today is understandable-thats why no contact is the best thing.I don't think dwelling upon how she feels is a good for you-hard as this sounds you should move on now.
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #130

    Sep 12, 2009, 06:29 AM

    Yeah that is why it is bad to contact it is merely a set back and accomplished nothing.
    She may have felt she needed the aggressiveness to be assertive to make sure you got the message without question.
    harriejansen's Avatar
    harriejansen Posts: 126, Reputation: 16
    Junior Member
     
    #131

    Sep 13, 2009, 12:29 PM

    Hi friends, have had a bad weekend but I feel I am getting better. Maybe it wasn't that bad to try the contact, at least I have a clear answer.

    I still can't understand her need to be so incredibly rude. I know I am delusional probably, but to be that rude means she must be hurt? It is not like I have been bombarding her with messages or something like that.
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
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    #132

    Sep 13, 2009, 01:13 PM

    Yes you have an answer-and whether she s hurt is no longer important.time to move on now.look after you and heal.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #133

    Sep 13, 2009, 06:12 PM

    I don't think she is hurt, or was rude.

    I thought you could handle rejection because you had nothing to lose?
    harriejansen's Avatar
    harriejansen Posts: 126, Reputation: 16
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    #134

    Sep 13, 2009, 07:16 PM

    Haha yes Tal, I thought I could handle it. I think I can but I felt the blow!

    And I do think it is not necessary to be rude and threatening. Anyway, I have difficulty with this, have to get it out of my mind.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #135

    Sep 13, 2009, 07:59 PM

    That's what happens when you push and don't take the hints a female gives to be nice, and let you down easy. You kept pushing and she got harsh, no biggie. Now you know.
    harriejansen's Avatar
    harriejansen Posts: 126, Reputation: 16
    Junior Member
     
    #136

    Sep 14, 2009, 02:00 AM

    Well, I am very likely to bump into her sooner or later, what then? All my other exes I always talk to?
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
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    #137

    Sep 14, 2009, 03:17 AM
    Should you bump into her say hello and walk away.thats all it takes.
    harriejansen's Avatar
    harriejansen Posts: 126, Reputation: 16
    Junior Member
     
    #138

    Sep 16, 2009, 12:53 AM

    Just venting a little bit. I am still waking up with her in my mind, several times a night. It is hard to move on without knowing what exactly went wrong. I am sitting here 300 metres from her house, I must admit I have drove by, even have seen her sitting in her balcony, alone, the weekend. In a couple of days I will leave again to see my kids for 2 weeks. I do not feel that bad actually, just frustrated about what could have been and the way it ended, and specially here nasty way of refusing to even talk about it, even if I have not at all flooded her with calls, mails, etc. I hope maybe some day to be able to understand what happened. I Thanks for being here friends, this board has helped me a lot.
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
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    #139

    Sep 16, 2009, 01:02 AM
    I think you re going to have to come to terms with the fact that you ll probably never get answers to your questions.In the long run it doesn't really matter what the answers might or might not be.We can only come up with our own answers to our own questions and try to learn from our o mistakes and hopefully have better relationships in the future.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #140

    Sep 16, 2009, 08:04 AM

    Her being so close will make no contact harder, as those old feelings will be stirred up again every time you see her house, or car, or a glimpse of her, but its about you being able to give yourself time, and a lot of it.

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