[KarmaAt20]

I started college 3 and a half years ago and I immediately started dating this girl. We had so much chemistry right off the bat. Everything was fine for the first two years, at least I think it was. I know looking back on things can make a person think they are better than they really were. Anyway, last summer we started having a lot of problems. We fought a lot, we slowly stopped having sex, and than we just stopped all together, and we just weren't as happy as we used to be. When school started up this year, we decided to take a break and see how things went. Nothing really got solved, and I actually broke my hand hitting a wall because she made me so upset. So at the beginning of this semester, we told each other it was over and we needed to be alone for a while. Here's the hard part though, we have every class together throughout the week. We spend at least 3-6 hours a day together in class, groups, etc. This girl has the power to frustrate me with only a few words, and its really hard for me to be around her daily. She tries to talk to me and pretends all is well between us. I know everyone says time heals all, but how can something heal if it is constantly getting injured still? I know everyone is just going to tell me to block her out and ignore her in class, but its really hard to do. She always sits by me, makes small talk, things like that. Sorry if I'm ranting, its just a really confusing time for me. Don't know how to get over this girl.

[ihatewestseneca]

I think you should sit down and have a talk with her, let her know that there's no way tou can get over her if she doesn't give you the space you need... if she cares about you at all (which she does because she keeps talking to you) then she'll respect you and give you space. Or you could change your classes around, but I think it may be too late. (at my school it is anyway)

Anyway, bottom line: tell her what you're telling us

[talaniman]

I so agree, that her being so close will make this very hard for you to get over her, and a nice long talk, for her to get the message you need time, and space is sorely needed. Be aware though her reaction may make things worse, but my philosiphy in this situation, was always "never let them see you sweat", not easy a path to follow either. See the links in my signature, for some good insights. School, like the workplace is a bad idea, for romantic interludes, for just this reason. It means you have to be MORE proactive in your healing process. Changing seats, and ending conversation, is only a start.