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amy 132 · Jun 22, 2012, 12:59 PM

Hi
I got back from seeing him I told him and all he said was that we needed time to think about things and then we can talk in a few weeks
He said to me not to tell anyone about the baby just yet and let us talk about it and then see about things
I guess everyone was right about him in someways it made me mad that he was like this and other OK about it
I think I might keep the baby without him as he wanted to just get away from me the min I told him about it
Thank you for the help
Amy

smoothy · Jun 22, 2012, 01:06 PM

You are a fool if you don't make him pay for raising the kid... he OWES you that much... under the law. You will be legally ENTITLED to that money. Especially for him being such an a s s with you about it. He's probibly done this to other girls before... and is likely to do it with others in the future. As long as he gets away without having to pay for it. And no you don't even have to see him to make him pay for it.

And because your life is going to forever change... you will no longer be the average 16 year old girl... you will be a mother... you will not be able to do the things your friends do... and in fact many of your friends won't be your friends much longer...

You should go to whatever authority in the UK collects or forces child support payments to be made.. that's a LOT of money that you will need because its very expensive to raise a child. And you will need every bit of money you can get.

amy 132 · Jun 22, 2012, 01:15 PM

I will have a look about that tomorrow
Thanks smoothy

smoothy · Jun 22, 2012, 01:17 PM

Originally Posted by amy 132

i will have a look about that tomorrow
thanks smoothy

You won't get child support until after the child is born.. but you will have many doctor visits before then... talk to your parents... you are going to need their help and support.

Yes they will be upset... but the longer you wait the more upset they will be for not telling them.

amy 132 · Jun 22, 2012, 01:20 PM

I guess
Will tell them soon

ScottGem · Jun 22, 2012, 01:21 PM

Originally Posted by amy 132

that we needed time to think about things and then we can talk in a few weeks
he said to me not to tell anyone about the baby just yet and let us talk about it and

Yes, you need to talk about it, but you can't wait a " few weeks". At your age, your body may not be fully developed for child birth. So you need to be under a doctor's care ASAP if you plan on having the child. So you need to make some decisions now.

amy 132 · Jun 22, 2012, 01:29 PM

He asked me not to so he cound think about everything and I get what you mean

ScottGem · Jun 22, 2012, 01:38 PM

I understand and I don't dispute he needs time to digest this. But you can't afford to give him a lot of time. You need to tell him that you have to see a doctor next week. So you both have to make some decisions.

amy 132 · Jun 22, 2012, 01:44 PM

Next week that's soon he wanted weeks (well till he called)
Thanks scottgem

ScottGem · Jun 22, 2012, 01:52 PM

Originally Posted by amy 132

next week thats soon he wanted weeks (well till he called)
thanks scottgem

You are not listening. You don't have weeks. I don't know how far along you are, but the fetus needs to be checked, you need to start on pre-natal vitamins and more. If you decide on an abortion it has to be done before a certain point. So you can't wait weeks for him to call!

Also, I wonder about your relationship if you go weeks without contact. If you are as in love as you indicated, you would be talking to him almost daily.

amy 132 · Jun 22, 2012, 02:05 PM

OK I will text him and see what he says about it as I want him to be OK with it when I do go

We talk most days but sometimes not . It all really on if he wants to talk or not and if he is in a good mood

smoothy · Jun 22, 2012, 03:51 PM

Originally Posted by amy 132

he asked me not to so he cound think about everything and i get what you mean

Does he need time to get out of the country? Move to another city? Why even consider what he wants... you saw how he reacted.

Is HE supporting you? No... your parents are... so what he wants or doesn't want has absolutely no bearing on anything at this point.

JudyKayTee · Jun 22, 2012, 03:53 PM

Originally Posted by ScottGem

I understand and I don't dispute he needs time to digest this. But you can't afford to give him a lot of time. You need to tell him that you have to see a doctor next week. So you both have to make some decisions.

And while he's thinking your baby is growing inside you.

Did ANYONE answer who is paying for the abortion?

JudyKayTee · Jun 22, 2012, 03:53 PM

Originally Posted by amy 132

ok i will text him and see what he says about it as i want him to be ok with it when i do go

we talk most days but sometimes not . it all really on if he wants to talk or not and if he is in a good mood

I hope the baby never gets on his nerves - or he's not in a good mood and the baby needs/wants something.

amy 132 · Jun 23, 2012, 02:06 AM

He did not text back last night
I am going to tell my mum and dad sometime today and see what they are like but I no that they will not for happy about as they did not want to me stay with him
And paying for the abortion if I do have one he said that he put toward if he makes up his mind that I am having one

J_9 · Jun 23, 2012, 03:39 AM

You need to see a doctor Monday. Your baby doesn't have a couple of weeks. You need to be checked and on vitamins to prevent birth defects.

Are you capable of taking care of a handicapped child? If you don't start vitamins NOW, you might just have a child with birth defects.

amy 132 · Jun 23, 2012, 03:52 AM

I don't want that on the baby but he asked me to wait so that he had time to think what he wanted to do about it and then tell me what to do then when he made his mind up
I am telling my mum and dad today sometime and see what they say about it what I know will not be anything good

J_9 · Jun 23, 2012, 03:57 AM

This is YOUR body and the health of YOUR baby! You do not have to do anything he wants you to do because I promise you he will not be a father to this child, but you will be a mother.

Telling your parents is going to be hard, I understand that. They will be angry and disappointed in the beginning, but you need them there for support because I can promise you that he won't be there to support you.

You truly don't have time to waste here. Do you even know how far along you are?

amy 132 · Jun 23, 2012, 04:03 AM

I think about 5 weeks but not very sure
I know but it like up to him really like he said last night that it his baby as well and that he wants me to do what he says to do as he know's best
I think he might be a good dad but he does get mad a lot of the time what is not OK really but it just the way he is

J_9 · Jun 23, 2012, 04:07 AM

I'm sorry, but he does NOT know what is best. You know how I know that? Because I'm a nurse, a labor and delivery nurse to be specific. Birth defects can happen during the very early stages of pregnancy and some of them cannot be reversed or cured.

Speaking from a professional standpoint, this guy is an idiot and doesn't know anything about early pregnancy. Also, it's not up to him, it's not HIS body, it's YOURS!

I get angrier and angrier at this abusive idiot the more I read this.