[Cat1864]

i think the reason might be because of all the stickies which say after 90 days you may send one text, and as i had a goal to focus on for all these months i could just tick off each day. we need a new goal maybe 365 days lol

You set the wrong goal to begin with if you were waiting for the day you could send a text.

The goal should be to not want to send the next text. To not care if you receive one. To move on and let the past go. You should be too busy living your life and meeting people to even remember what the date is.

Ticking off each day keeps it new in your mind each day. It builds up the anticipation and makes it stronger. In effect, you have been keeping in touch with her each day that you plan for that little bit of contact.

Let the past go. Live and enjoy your life.

[fireguy40]

Hi elwwodb sorry I couldn't remember your name when I posted earlier and couldn't find your thread,

Glad your doing OK mate, the time occupying has being mostly spend in the gym, getting in touch with people I haven't spoken to in ages, and saying yes to any invite I get, regardless of if it sounds like a poo idea at the time.

I have made a reel effort to get back in touch with mates again and try to organize going for a pint, (being in oz you might agree with this more than our friends in the states lol) your lucky with summer coming we are coming to what was the best part of the year for me, autumn with bonfires but long dark cold nights lol


Hi cat,
I didn't think I was mentally counting down to sending a text, just that I would have reached a major marker in sorting my head out.

How ever when you point it out maybe subconsciously I was.
God knows you think your all fixed then bang ! Lol

[fireguy40]

Hi Folks Ive been away from here for a while keeping busy with work and whatnot, just thought id give an update for anyone who reads this thing,

Things are pretty good, back on the dating scene full time now, reconnecting with my mates and rediscovering who I used to be with a new 2.0 version of improvements lol,

The other big news is after nearly 4 months I had contact with my ex, and it was pretty positive and I'm kind of happy with how I dealt with it.
A couple of weeks ago and I came home a little tipsy from a good night out with the lads, I logged in to msn to check my emails and saw my ex was listed as online but away she hasn't been online in ages.
After thinking about it for over an hour and with the false bravado of booze I just fired of a quick email, nice and light just saying I hope she had a good summer, her daughter was OK and that things were good in her life and logged off.

I forgot all about when I woke up till the horrible hangover moment of drinking my first coffee and having a smoke, doh did I feel daft ;-)
About an hour later I logged back online and before it had even booted up properly my ex had fired me a message saying good morning,

We chatted for about 5 minutes, once again I was happy and light said I'm fantastic and just talked about some new stuff going on, it seems like she's OK but not brilliant (but I'm not here as the strong shoulder I was for 10 years), The main thing is she's OK, her daughter is good so it put my mind at rest, I ended the chat by saying had to go as I was going for a day out she wished me well and said she was glad I was happy in life.

All in all it was pretty good, I guess I had the questions answered that I wanted to know, we didn't talk about new partners or anything deep ( I'm not sure if I want to know just yet, I'm good but not ready for that yet) kept it happy and almost feel like I got a bit of closure in my mind so all in all a result,

The spooky thing is she hasn't been back on line since so I guess we both got what we needed from one chat, that NC thing worked a dream thanks everyone

[Homegirl 50]

I'm glad things are going well for you.
Thanks for the update.

[mystific]

Its always nice to read from time to time the 'light at the end of the tunnel' tributes.

Good for you! :)