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    missinher's Avatar
    missinher Posts: 8, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #21

    Sep 1, 2010, 02:03 PM

    I am trying so hard to move on but it doesn't make sense if this is hurting us both. She is almost completed her final year (4weeks left) and it's the most stressful part. Yeh he is her age and is friends with her friends, we spoke Monday and she told me she doesn't want to date anyone ATM, she wants to focus on exams, which I guess as her final exams I understand the stress. Wat I don't get is if she is over this then why does it hurt her? If this is what she wants then why does it hurt her?
    vanheart's Avatar
    vanheart Posts: 2,806, Reputation: 708
    Ultra Member
     
    #22

    Sep 1, 2010, 02:27 PM

    I think you should leave her alone.
    Let her focus on what she needs to do.

    And you focus on yourself, not her or trying to figure her out. Especially a 17 year old.

    She already said that she doesn't want to date anyone right now. That includes you.

    I don't blame her, she's young. Sounds like you are the one that's not acting mature here. Don't force the situation any further.

    Man up & move on. You will thank yourself later.
    Just Looking's Avatar
    Just Looking Posts: 1,610, Reputation: 480
    Ultra Member
     
    #23

    Sep 1, 2010, 02:28 PM

    You were a big part of her life for a year and she cared about you. It's natural she's hurting. Even the person who breaks up a relationship feels a loss, but sometimes you just know it's the right thing to do. It also makes sense that she feels she needs to explore life some more before settling down. This is so typical of teenagers, and rightfully so.

    Is she a good student? Does she want to go to college? That could also be weighing on her mind. Even though her parents don't know about you, they are probably having an influence on her thinking. They are most likely talking to her about her future and causing her to think long and hard about what she wants. That's the way it should be. She needs to grow up. Nothing wrong with that - she's 17.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #24

    Sep 1, 2010, 02:31 PM

    Harshness warning

    Your not supposed to get what a 17 year old GIRL is going through. And its pretty unhealthy to try, so stop the contact so you WILL be able to get it!

    You are way to available for your own good to this teeny bopper, who lives in ignorant bliss as to what life is really about.

    No wonder she seems so mature to you because your NOT!!
    Kitkat22's Avatar
    Kitkat22 Posts: 6,302, Reputation: 1191
    Uber Member
     
    #25

    Sep 1, 2010, 02:44 PM

    Grow up! Leave her alone! You're too old for her and you should have never, ever been involved in the first place.

    Stop whining and feeling sorry for yourself. Find someone your own age.
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
    Dating & Teen Expert
     
    #26

    Sep 1, 2010, 02:46 PM

    You need to leave this girl alone. You had no business messing with her in the first place but that's water under the bridge.
    Use your head (the upper one) man.
    She is teenager in her last year of high school and college ahead of her and you're wanting to deprive her of that.
    Let your thing for this minor go and date someone your own age. Let this girl have a life.
    silverlining's Avatar
    silverlining Posts: 52, Reputation: 30
    Junior Member
     
    #27

    Sep 1, 2010, 03:00 PM

    I know how hard it can be to let someone you love go.. But she needs time to experience life and grow.. Getting married at 21? You wouldn't want her to get caught up in the fantasy of it then wake up one day resenting you because she never had a chance to see what's out there..

    You got to let her live her life and if it's meant to be between the two of you she will come back to you when she's ready..
    Kitkat22's Avatar
    Kitkat22 Posts: 6,302, Reputation: 1191
    Uber Member
     
    #28

    Sep 1, 2010, 03:04 PM

    She's with kids her own age. Let her go and stop trying to lay a guilt trip on her.
    vanheart's Avatar
    vanheart Posts: 2,806, Reputation: 708
    Ultra Member
     
    #29

    Sep 1, 2010, 03:46 PM

    You both have your lives ahead of you.
    Don't screw either one up with selfishness.

    There's a big, unexplored world out there.

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