[itsamor]

And thanks rick, I need to stop trying to please people

[spoilsport]

I think its time for you to move on. Keep you eyes and ears open. Know more people. First of all be comfortable and be who you are.. don't try and do what you don't like...
Maybe you should stay away from him and get yourself a hobby to keep yourself busy

[itsamor]

We have the perfect chemistry and have the most amazing sex I have ever had in my life. We both agree, but there's something about him that stirs me the wrong way. I guess I think he's pretty selfish. And he thinks I'm a b****. I'm just very blunt, and sarcastic. He's the leader in a band and I don't know seems like he needs to be the commander and chief 24/7. Unlike when I first started dating him.. I pretty much had all control. We both have emotional/mental disorders and have been through a lot. He keeps telling me he's going to marry me one day. And he wants me to be his baby's momma. Yet we aren't "together" right now. I even went as far as to stop talking to him period. I blocked him on the internet and wouldn't pick up his calls.. He got on his bands AIM Sn and started saying how much he misses/loves me and even saw one of my friends and kept asking everyone if they've seen me and to tell them to tell me to talk to him. I gave in... and un blocked him and even hung out with him yesterday. I'm trying to figure out what about him pisses me off so much. He's very snappy and short tempered. As am I at times. Maybe we both are so much alike we clash =/
And get mad at something that we do our own selves. I just can't figure out why he NEEDS me to talk to him and be in his life so bad but not be his girlfriend? I know he's busy but it makes me feel not good enough. Plus he doesn't sleep around with other girls or even interested in any.. which is weird and he's everything I want.. despite a few character flaws. But I've been randomly hooking up with people (I mean I AM single!) But he begs me not to talk about other guys and always says he hopes he's the only guy I sleep with. Which starts making me feel guilty un-like when I stop talking to him altogether. Idk what he wants out of me. :(

[BlackVY]

Hmm this does seem confusing... and this guy doesn't seem to know what he really wants, which is bad, because its confusing you and making you feel bad for doing what you want, while you are single, which shouldn't make you feel bad at all...

I guess you need to sit down and talk with him, if possible, and tell him he can't keep playing you like this and stringing you along, and if he wants to be with you, make it official, be his girlfriend, but if he doesn't know, or isn't sure, or can't do it right now, then tell him he doesn't have the right to tell you what to do, or make you feel bad when the 2 of you aren't in a relationship.

My guess is you are both very strong and dominant personalities and that always causes conflict. Its hard to accept, but for this to work, one of you might have to step down a little and let the other lead, to some extent.

This is not something you hear everyday, and now with women's rights now, but yeah, you can't have 2 leaders in a relationship, just like you can't have 2 drivers with 2 steer wheels in one car. One needs to be the driver, and the other the passenger... but the passenger still has a say where they go, so its not all bad...

I hope you get what I'm trying to say... and I hope it works out..

[chicky42]

I am in the same position! Only me n my guy have been together for almost 2 years and then he just broke it of, said he's not ready for a relationship but still wants to sleep with me and spend some time with me but only on his terms and makes me feel bad when I go out with my friends without him

[BlackVY]

I am in the exact same position! Only me n my guy have been together for almost 2 years and then he just broke it of, said he's not ready for a relationship but still wants to sleep with me and spend some time with me but only on his terms and makes me feel bad when i go out with my friends without him

Wow! Now that's just not good... its really not cool... right there, he is playing you, using you and just keeping you around as a back up... you shouldn't let him do this. Stand up for yourself and be strong..

[chicky42]

Wow! Now thats just not good... its really not cool... right there, he is playing you, using you and just keeping you around as a back up... you shouldn't let him do this. Stand up for yourself and be strong..

Its so hard though, I still love him I thought we were happy and then next thing its over. I miss him and still want to be with him which is why I keep running to him when he calls. HELP!

[BlackVY]

See? He knows this... he knows you are there at his beck and call... so why date you exclusively? He has got the best of both worlds...

He can use you when he wants, and if he has something better to do, then cya...

Seriously, you may love him, but what he is showing you is definitely not love... if you don't believe me, start a new thread of your own and see what everyone else has to say...

Sorry for the temporary hijack itsamor... back on track now... :)

[chicky42]

See? He knows this... he knows you are there at his beck and call... so why date you exclusively? He has got the best of both worlds...

He can use you when he wants, and if he has something better to do, then cya...

Seriously, you may love him, but what he is showing you is definitely not love... if you don't believe me, start a new thread of your own and see what everyone else has to say...

Sorry for the temporary hijack itsamor... back on track now... :)

Sorry itsamor :)

[itsamor]

It okay, I'm the one who broke up with him after we were dating for like 2 years... then he always comes running back to me.. and we got back together and he broke up with me but that was after he found out I slept with his best friend and he couldn't handle it. Idk we keep switching on and off and it is very confusing. Something tells me no matter what we'll end up together though.

[talaniman]

This isn't confusing, you're using each other for amusement, but you both play games, that are not so amusing. Neither of you have boundaries, just lust that you act on, and enjoy.

Have fun playing your games. That's all they are.

[itsamor]

Thread over/i solved my problem.

[Wondergirl]

thread over/i solved my problem.

And after all the experience and effort and writing we've poured into your question, you're not going to share how you solved your problem? We're going to go to bed tonight totally oblivious? We will never know?