Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    ZoeMarie's Avatar
    ZoeMarie Posts: 2,049, Reputation: 468
    Ultra Member
     
    #21

    Dec 2, 2008, 07:15 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by DeleteAndBan View Post
    Didnt you notice this before he married you ?

    Or is Marriage now his safetyline since it makes it harder for you to leave and will make it easier for him to just do what he wants.

    I agree with enken about the paternalizing treatment you give him. Giving someone a reward is ok, but are your gonna give him rewards for every thing he does now? Forever?

    What if you stop giving rewards, will he stop doing the stuff ? (because unfortunately he is not REALLY a dog so he will not, after 1 reward, expect it to be given forever)
    Umm... no because we didn't live together. My family is old fashioned. Actually things are going A LOT better which is why I updated on here. When I'm at work he'll start laundry, vacuum, whatever. It was JBeaucaire's advice that got us to this point. And no, I don't reward him all the time, but when he really goes out of his way, like when he was shoveling, I didn't even know that he bought a shovel.
    JBeaucaire's Avatar
    JBeaucaire Posts: 5,426, Reputation: 997
    Software Expert
     
    #22

    Dec 2, 2008, 09:59 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by ZoeMarie View Post
    umm... no because we didn't live together. my family is old fashioned. actually things are going A LOT better which is why I updated on here. When I'm at work he'll start laundry, vacuum, whatever. It was JBeaucaire's advice that got us to this point. and no, I don't reward him all the time, but when he really goes out of his way, like when he was shoveling, I didn't even know that he bought a shovel.
    Awesome and more awesome. This stuff can really get fun when you start to have fun, huh?

    My wife and I are coming up on our 24th anniversary. We fight, don't get me wrong, we have some doozies... but usually within minutes of the argument we are laughing and playing about something else.

    We thank each other constantly, often insincerely, which is ALSO funny as hell. Cause at the core, even though we do this sincerely, insincerely, sarcastically, routinely and frequently, we also know we actually mean it, even the sarcastic times. We do.

    She called me from work last Tuesday just to say she was thinking about me in the middle of the day and to say "hi". Awesome stuff. That got her a pot of my famous chili by the time she got home.

    Fun and more fun, that's what I say. Arguments will come, then let them go...
    ZoeMarie's Avatar
    ZoeMarie Posts: 2,049, Reputation: 468
    Ultra Member
     
    #23

    Dec 2, 2008, 10:21 AM

    Thank you so much! We're learning.. it just takes time =)
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #24

    Dec 2, 2008, 11:21 AM

    A couple that can't argue, or disagree ain't going to last long for sure.

    Hehehe, wife just took the garbage out, didn't say a word either. Should I sleep with one eye opened for a week??

    Or should I press for sex?? Hmmmm!
    ZoeMarie's Avatar
    ZoeMarie Posts: 2,049, Reputation: 468
    Ultra Member
     
    #25

    Dec 2, 2008, 11:25 AM

    Lol! I totally agree with what you said about a couple that can't argue or disagree isn't going to last long. Pretty much means there's no communication if you think about it.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #26

    Dec 2, 2008, 11:57 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by ZoeMarie View Post
    lol! I totally agree with what you said about a couple that can't argue or disagree isn't going to last long. pretty much means there's no communication if you think about it.
    Is that a NO, for expecting sex, or YES, for sleeping with one eye opened?? :confused:
    ZoeMarie's Avatar
    ZoeMarie Posts: 2,049, Reputation: 468
    Ultra Member
     
    #27

    Dec 2, 2008, 12:09 PM

    Hmm... I don't know. Lol. Let me get this straight. Your wife took the garbage out and didn't say anything? You could try for sex as a "thank you for taking the garbage out." hahaha
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #28

    Dec 2, 2008, 12:50 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by ZoeMarie View Post
    hmm... I don't know. lol. let me get this straight. your wife took the garbage out and didn't say anything? you could try for sex as a "thank you for taking the garbage out." hahaha
    Geez, NO, sex isn't a thank you, it's a sleep inducer, and stress reliever. :rolleyes:, Now if I took out the garbage, then sex would be a welcome "thank you" :eek:, but that's never happened :mad:, so maybe we'll just sleep with our eyes open, :cool: just in case she is PO'd about taking the garbage out. :D

    I told you marriage is about adjustments.
    ZoeMarie's Avatar
    ZoeMarie Posts: 2,049, Reputation: 468
    Ultra Member
     
    #29

    Dec 2, 2008, 01:07 PM

    Yeah, I know. I was kidding about my last post. Go with your gut and sleep with one eye open and you might want to get goggles and fill them with visine so that it doesn't get too dried out.

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions

 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search


Check out some similar questions!

I want to understand - I truly do [ 22 Answers ]

Please help me understand why this should not upset me because it does. I was so close to having my mind made up in voting for Barack. So close to the point it felt good and right. And then this. And this is not that made up slop email stuff trying to hurt him, this is real. It is one thing...

Need to understand her [ 12 Answers ]

Hi guys/gals, I´m a 30 y/o male, European (if that matters) and this is my first time around. Anyway, to the point: I´ve been working in this same place for almost 5 years now. When I first got there, there was a young woman (she´s 28 now) that caught my attention. Soon, I discovered that she...

Does anyone understand [ 7 Answers ]

I understand that this question is pretty stupid and is probably a waste of everyone's time but I was wondering why there are such courses like 'how to choose a tv' I can sort of understand when people really don't know and refuse to be ripped off, but isn't it just a waste of a course that could...


View more questions Search