[odinn7]

You'll be OK... just follow what Wondergirl told you. No contact. Once you break that rule and do have contact with him, it will be harder to get over him. Keep reminding yourself of the garbage he has put you through.

Stay strong.

[Anisha N]

You'll be ok....just follow what Wondergirl told you. No contact. Once you break that rule and do have contact with him, it will be harder to get over him. Keep reminding yourself of the garbage he has put you through.

Stay strong.

Yes, now I know for certain that I must stay away from him and that it's the right thing to do. I hope I don't give in. I won't!! :) thank you odinn7. Will keep you posted :) god bless

[J_9]

What you seriously need to do is to block him from your phone, block him from FB and any other way you possibly can.

You need to get on with your life. Without him. He is holding you back in a serious way.

I'm just wondering, is the face to face meeting with him going to be of any use?

Use to you? Or him? It's no use to you. But it is to him as he will still be dragging you along in his drama.

I need some answers from him, about the past.

Answers to what? No, you don't need answers to anything.

Time to put on the big girl panties and sweep him out of your life. Totally and completely.

[Anisha N]

What you seriously need to do is to block him from your phone, block him from FB and any other way you possibly can.

You need to get on with your life. Without him. He is holding you back in a serious way.

Use to you? Or him? It's no use to you. But it is to him as he will still be dragging you along in his drama.

Answers to what? No, you don't need answers to anything.

Time to put on the big girl panties and sweep him out of your life. Totally and completely.

Thank you so much for your response J_9.
Yes when wondergirl and odinn7 suggested I keep no contact with him... I was wondering if I should block him from my phone..

The thing is, he broke up with me very randomly when we were doing long distance and didn't talk to me for months. Thank god I had college to keep me occupied..

Now that you've mentioned it, I will block him from my phone.the last thing I want.. is a text from him.. and me contemplating if I should reply or not.

I cannot wait to realize one day that he's no longer a part of my everyday thoughts and reason for anxiety I feel. No one should ever feel sad because another person is not being honest and open with them. Thanks to you guys, I'm going to seriously think of myself this time. Thank you for making me see that I don't 'need answers from him.

[Anisha N]

Hey guys, Im hoping you remember me and my story. Well, I have updates and I really need your advice...

My ex contacted me repeatedly an I finally gave in and met him. He somehow came home and had a two hour long conversation and his and my future about how he still cares for me and even showed her my passport size pictures in his wallet... and a lot of things he told her...
Anyway, my point is.. he hasn't spoken to me yet. About his feeligs, our past long distance relationship and why things fell apart.. he hasn't spoken to me about it yet.
So after that session with my mother, its been a week and a half.. I haven't heard from him at all.. I know he is working hard.. but sometimes I even see him online...

Why is he keeping this silence again? Please advice me on what I should do. I wish I didn't give in and meet him...

But who knew he would make such confessions to my mother about his feelings for me and then disappear..

Please, I hope I hear from you soon guys.

God bless

[odinn7]

My advice doesn't change... he keeps proving me right. I mean what kind of message is he sending? He tells your mother how much he cares but can't tell you... can't even acknowledge you... and you just keep eating it up. I am sorry, but you are just asking to get kicked and it's eventually going to happen.

[talaniman]

I would be very angry at someone trying to work my feelings through my family, and feel you should be too. It's like he can do whatever he wants and anyway he wants and come and go as he pleases without explanation. All of this I feel to get you to chase him on his terms.

Yes I would be furious, but instead of cussing him out properly like he deserves and having no more to do with him, I would surely tell my family of my wish to no longer consider him a part of your life and tell him to go to hell.

But you stick with No Contact whatsoever.

[Anisha N]

My advice doesn't change...he keeps proving me right. I mean what kind of message is he sending? He tells your mother how much he cares but can't tell you...can't even acknowledge you...and you just keep eating it up. I am sorry, but you are just asking to get kicked and it's eventually going to happen.

Hi Odinn7... you're right about how I keep eat up whatever he has to give me, be it bad or good. I just cannot understand what his intentions are... why can't he be normal? Like other humans.. and tell what's on his mind.
Its like a pattern, he always comes back to see if I care.. and once he's made sure of that, he leaves me to live my life... and knows that I'm there for him. Its like he wants me to be his... but he cannot say it because he cannot commit and he's concentrating on his career, and so am I.

I would be very angry at someone trying to work my feelings thru my family, and feel you should be too. It's like he can do whatever he wants and anyway he wants and come and go as he pleases without explanation. All of this I feel to get you to chase him on his terms.

Yes I would be furious, but instead of cussing him out properly like he deserves and having no more to do with him, I would surely tell my family of my wish to no longer consider him a part of your life and tell him to go to hell.

But you stick with No Contact whatsoever.

Hi talaniman for taking the time to read my question. I haven't contacted him.. and I won't either. Though I did text him once and he replied after 24 hours or more. I just keep breaking the no contact rule, because I want to know what he's up to... I just don't understand him. I want to figure this out I guess...

But I am very furious. If I show him how furious I am... he will run right back into his shell and I will have no have to find my answers.

I am not contacting him in any way whatsoever. I will continue to keep it this way until he has something to say to me, something worth my while. I will continue to concentrate on myself and my work.

I hope you have a nice day :)

[talaniman]

It takes a life time to know and understand another human and that's only when there is a willingness to commit to that learning process by committing to share it. He has not, he shares NOTHING, and his actions are a signal he will not. So don't waste your time because of curiosity and false hope and keep this emotional attachment alive in your own mind.

For whatever reason he is stringing you along, its just not healthy on an emotional, and spiritual level, nor fair, so forget the notion he can fulfill any of your wishes. Protect yourself by making a clean cut of his disruptive nature as its but a preview of life with him, as no one can change another and his ways, as some humans are healthier than others, and more compatible than others to you.

You can find happiness without him and do better than him. Do it, and be able to see a better future for yourself than he offers, which is NOTHING.

His words and actions just don't match. That's a BIG RED FLAG you shouldn't ignore.

[Anisha N]

It takes a life time to know and understand another human and that's only when there is a willingness to commit to that learning process by committing to share it. He has not, he shares NOTHING, and his actions are a signal he will not. So don't waste your time because of curiosity and false hope and keep this emotional attachment alive in your own mind.

For whatever reason he is stringing you along, its just not healthy on an emotional, and spiritual level, nor fair, so forget the notion he can fulfill any of your wishes. Protect yourself by making a clean cut of his disruptive nature as its but a preview of life with him, as no one can change another and his ways, as some humans are healthier than others, and more compatible than others to you.

You can find happiness without him and do better than him. Do it, and be able to see a better future for yourself than he offers, which is NOTHING.

His words and actions just don't match. That's a BIG RED FLAG you shouldn't ignore.

Thank you for your thoughtful reply : )
Yes, he hasn't really offered much.. whereas I know for a fact that I've always been there for him.
And you're right.. he is just stringing me along.. oh, and once he does that.. he leaves me hanging by that string.. not for days but for months, even a year.
I feel so upset.. and I hope one day, I will know how he actually felt during this time, I really hope. But I'm not going to make an effort to find out now... I'm not over him, I'm still very vulnerable, but I am staying strong, if that makes sense.
I will try to keep the big red flag in mind.
Btw, I still haven't heard from him. I need to channel y energy somewhere else.. maybe exercise or yoga or something... I must!!

[Anisha N]

Hey you guys... I hope you remember my story, my sad sob story.
After all the great advice you guys gave me... I fell for 'his crap.. and spoke to him after he contacted me. After all the crap he put me through... I gave it a second chance.
Its been a month that we've sort of 'been together now'-,. and I'm back to square one now. He doesn't care. He hasn't contacted me in over a week... and I just have not heard from him.
I think I will lose my mind if I have to lose him again. I'm in a really bad place right now... he made it seem like we've gotten back together.. and we even had 'talks'...

Well, I know now that he doesn't care. And maybe he doesn't want this. I need help. I need to know of things I can do.. to get over him, and to let him go... for the last time.
I've realised that talking to him only gives me false hope... he has no good to offer me.. and he doesn't want this relationship and does not respect it.

I feel so foolish and stupid. I know I should have never returned his calls in the first place... he hasn't called me now... and I'm dying.

I need to get over this. I need to pull myself together for the last time. I so stupid how I can't get myself to move on and leave him... I don't know what is wrong with me... I don't know why I'm still depending on him to tell me things. Why I'm depending on all the things he's promised me and told me in the very recent past...

I need to I need to I need to move on. My friends have given up on me...

[talaniman]

Don't wait any longer for words, his actions have spoken even louder. Okay so you learned the hard way, but I bet the lesson is well learned. Better late than NEVER! Disappear!!

[N0help4u]

You are in love with the memories, people tend to romance the good memories while pushing the bad ones to the back of their mind. Of course you are going to still have feelings for him, he was a big part of your life.

[Anisha N]

Don't wait any longer for words, his actions have spoken even louder. Okay so you learned the hard way, but I bet the lesson is well learned. Better late than NEVER! Disappear!!!!

I can guarantee you that I have seen the lesson... but I hope I apply it.. and 'learn. I am generally a sensible person... but with regard to him... I have lost control of my thoughts and I've lost control. I keep waiting for him to contact me... I keep wondering why he suddenly stopped contacting me... I know I must not contact him.. and I will not.
I hate how I've made him such a big big big big part of my life.
I hate how he can control my emotions and thouhts.
I hate how I think of him all the time even now...

I hope I never ever talk to him. I hope I muster up enough courage in my life..

You are in love with the memories, people tend to romance the good memories while pushing the bad ones to the back of their mind. Of course you are going to still have feelings for him, he was a big part of your life.

I hope I stop thinking so much about him. I really really hope. I hope I think less of him at least.. I can't stand how he's always on my mind. I can't stop wondering if he's going to contact me...
I feel so stupid and needy and dumb... ugh

[Anisha N]

Hi friends :) hope you guys are doing well.. I have something I need to discuss with you guys..

[Cat1864]

Hi friends :) hope you guys are doing well.. I have something I need to discuss with you guys..

If it is about this person/situation all you have to do is post the question/information in this thread. If it is about your new question (Congratulations on the trainee position.) then those who can help you will read and answer it there.

[Anisha N]

Thank you Cat :) thanks for keeping an eye out.

I'm so glad I have a job.. it keeps me so busy and keeps me in control. Well, my ex^^ had last contacted me over a month ago.. the last time we spoke he promised me that I was the only one for him. And that he was going to marry only me. And, guess what.. I don't hear from him again.

Anyway, I hope I get over him soon. My best friend has been telling me for two years how much he is in love with me. But he's a bad boy. He is not my type. I really do love him.

If I do decide to move on, I'm afraid my ex will come back. After all, the last Tim we spoke.. he did say a lot of things. What do you think?

[N0help4u]

Sounds like you are 'the type' of girl he is looking for IF he ever decides to settle down.
He is possibly trying to get your hopes up where you figure you can wait because he wants you... someday. Get on with your life. There is no point in waiting, and waiting, and waiting for something to someday maybe happen. You have no control over making a relationship happen with him so why waste your time on maybe's

[Anisha N]

Sounds like you are 'the type' of girl he is looking for IF he ever decides to settle down.
He is possibly trying to get your hopes up where you figure you can wait because he wants you.....someday. Get on with your life. There is no point in waiting, and waiting, and waiting for something to someday maybe happen. You have no control over making a relationship happen with him so why waste your time on maybe's

Yes, precisely. I know he thinks we will be perfect together and he truly thinks I'm his type. And I know it's a BIG BIG maybe... I haven't heard from him in ages.. I hope this passes soon...

Do you think I can be in another relationship? Or just not? I haven't been with anyone else, in a relationship, since he left the country. Two years ago.

[Anisha N]

Threads merged

Hi friends,

Its about me again. I haven't heard from my ex in over two months now... the last time we spoke, he told me we were meant to be forever...

Its not that I want to move on.. I keep wishing he comes back.. will he?
Only because he said so.. will he? I'm not are anymore.. as in, for some reason, I have a feeling that he will come back.. only difference is.. he is taking longer than usual..

I love... him! Or the idea of what we had in the past? I'm not sure. I hope he comes back, or at least contacts me.. so I'll know what his deal is..

If we're together or not. If he is going to be mine forever or not.. or if he wats me or not..

I've blocked him from Facebook, don't have his contact numbers, don't have him on bbm.. so there is no way to contact him, unless I email him.

Should I let him go? But how...