[ScottGem]

and you say i just admitted i didnt chose to have the child? I did choose to have the child...thats why im having it, and why we are talking about custody. I didnt ask if for you to judge me as an unfit parent, or whatever you would like to think, i asked in this forum if these things could be used against my ex boyfriend in a custody case. that is all.

Do you have a problem with the english language? You keep misreading what I am saying and attributing the wrong meaning to my words.

Again YOU said you didn't plan to have this child. That means you did not choose to have the child. However once you found yourself pregnant you chose to keep the child, which is to your credit and I applaud you for it.

And no where did I or anyone say you were unfit as a parent. We are talking about the father having custody which is the issue you raised.

[JudyKayTee]

I think the Court may very well see bad judgment on both parts.

And when you post on a public board you really shouldn't expect everyone to agree with you.

What is an "involuntary nature"?

[confoozed]

I think the Court may very well see bad judgment on both parts.

And when you post on a public board you really shouldn't expect everyone to agree with you.

What is an "involuntary nature"?

No one said they had to agree with me, but its nice to have answers and not be judged for something I did not ask about on this forum...

Involuntary nature... involuntary meaning done without conscious control. Concerned in bodily processes that are not under the control of the will...

[confoozed]

Do you have a problem with the english language? You keep misreading what I am saying and attributing the wrong meaning to my words.

Again YOU said you didn't plan to have this child. That means you did not choose to have the child. However once you found yourself pregnant you chose to keep the child, which is to your credit and I applaud you for it.

And no where did I or anyone say you were unfit as a parent. We are talking about the father having custody which is the issue you raised.

No where did I ask if the father could have custody, all I asked was if it could be used against him in the court of law. Id appreciate if you'd read the forum question correctly.

[JudyKayTee]

No one said they had to agree with me, but its nice to have answers and not be judged for something i did not ask about on this forum...

involuntary nature....involuntary meaning done without conscious control. Concerned in bodily processes that are not under the control of the will......

Involuntarily drinking and threatening to kill a Police Officer with a knife? Who told you that was a criminal charge?

The answers you received are based on what YOU posted. You are anonymous. "We" don't know you. We DO know you are pregnant by someone with a criminal record, a serious criminal record. Your concern is custody of your child - which is understandable.

You are the one who dated this guy.

And I'll share a story - I was divorced some years ago. I was telling a friend what a lousy rat he was and I was going on and she said, kindly and sweetly, her hand on my arm, "Remember. You have to live with it." And I sputtered at her and she said, "You chose him."

And, so, you got pregnant by this guy. Your judgment when you are criticizing him comes into play.

And it will come into play in Court.

Now - if you'd rather hear that the Court will believe every word you say, ban him from the child's life, refuse to give him any visitation, then believe that and go into Court totally unprepared and possibly be surprised by the outcome.

This is the Family Law forum. "We" tell it like it is.

[ScottGem]

No where did i ask if the father could have custody, all i asked was if it could be used against him in the court of law. id appreciate if you'd read the forum question correctly.

Maybe you need to read your own questions before you make a fool of yourself. This is what you said in the intitial post:

Can this be used against him during a child custody case

So yes you did ask about a custody case. Plus other threads you started make it clear what you were asking about. All we have done is try to help you, by making you aware of the legal realities. And you give us lip over it.

[confoozed]

Involuntarily drinking and threatening to kill a Police Officer with a knife? Who told you that was a criminal charge?

The answers you received are based on what YOU posted. You are anonymous. "We" don't know you. We DO know you are pregnant by someone with a criminal record, a serious criminal record. Your concern is custody of your child - which is understandable.

You are the one who dated this guy.

And I'll share a story - I was divorced some years ago. I was telling a friend what a lousy rat he was and I was going on and she said, kindly and sweetly, her hand on my arm, "Remember. You have to live with it." And I sputtered at her and she said, "You chose him."

And, so, you got pregnant by this guy. Your judgment when you are criticizing him comes into play.

And it will come into play in Court.

Now - if you'd rather hear that the Court will believe every word you say, ban him from the child's life, refuse to give him any visitation, then believe that and go into Court totally unprepared and possibly be surprised by the outcome.

This is the Family Law forum. "We" tell it like it is.

How do you "choose" someone after knowing them for 4 months? You don't. People have sex with people they don't CHOOSE for a father. That's just how it happens, not everyone who has sex thinks hey, this is who I'm going to have my child with. When you look back at his violent history by getting kicked out of his apartment and threatening the cops, I think its quite reasonable I'm questioning the type of person he is, knowing him for such a short amount of time, and not having a criminal record myself.

The chargers were underage drinking and weapon class A, I'm pretty sure weapon charge is cirminal, but who knows, I could be wrong.

[confoozed]

Maybe you need to read your own questions before you make a fool of yourself. this is what you said in the intitial post:



So yes you did ask about a custody case. Plus other threads you started make it clear what you were asking about. All we have done is try to help you, by making you aware of the legal realities. And you give us lip over it.

Yes it is about a custody case, but I never once said I wanted to take away his custody, maybe just supervised visits... in reality, I only asked if in a custody case, it could be used against him. That's all. I didn't ask if I would win, or if I could take away all of his parenting rights, that wasn't what I asked. But thank you for the added information.

[JudyKayTee]

how do you "choose" someone after knowing them for 4 months? you dont. people have sex with people they dont CHOOSE for a father. thats just how it happens, not everyone who has sex thinks hey, this is who im going to have my child with. when you look back at his violent history by getting kicked out of his apartment and threatening the cops, i think its quite reasonable i'm questioning the type of person he is, knowing him for such a short amount of time, and not having a criminal record myself.

the chargers were underage drinking and weapon class A, i'm pretty sure weapon charge is cirminal, but who knows, i could be wrong.

Sorry, but, no, not all people have sex with people they've known for 4 months. You are lucky that all you "caught" was pregnant.

And, yes, you know, I DO look at every man I'm considering being intimate with as a possible father for my possible child and I DO ask questions and decide if a person is truthful or not - or at least I try.

If you DON'T, you are, quite frankly, a fool.

Everyone makes mistakes. Stop putting "everyone" in the same category of having recreational sex at some point in a 4-month relationship. Speak for yourself - not for me.

This man is problematical, to say the least - and you are having a child with him.

And I'll repeat - keep wearing blinders, get into Court, have the Judge ask you about your relationship and look like more of a fool.

[ScottGem]

how do you "choose" someone after knowing them for 4 months? you dont. people have sex with people they dont CHOOSE for a father. thats just how it happens, not everyone who has sex thinks hey, this is who im going to have my child with.

And this is what I object to. Sex is NOT a recreational sport. It is something to be shared between two people in a long term committed relationship. Whenever one engages in sexual intercourse, they are risking a pregnancy so they SHOULD be thinking 'is this person someone I want as the parent of my child?' Maybe if more people thought this way there would be less problems in this world.

But your posts clearly implied that you were trying to block or limit his custody. And we have given you answers to help with that. So stop arguing with us.

[JudyKayTee]

But your posts clearly implied that you were trying to block or limit his custody. And we have given you answers to help with that. So stop arguing with us.

And if this attitude carries into the Courtroom OP is going to lose. Sad, but true.

I see NOTHING in his past that keeps him from visiting with his child - nothing. Supervised, perhaps. No visitation? No.

And, as we "regulars" know, the Court will decide who is BEST suited to parent.

[confoozed]

And this is what I object to. Sex is NOT a recreational sport. It is something to be shared between two people in a long term committed relationship. Whenever one engages in sexual intercourse, they are risking a pregnancy so they SHOULD be thinking 'is this person someone I want as the parent of my child?' Maybe if more people thought this way there would be less problems in this world.

But your posts clearly implied that you were trying to block or limit his custody. And we have given you answers to help with that. So stop arguing with us.

Yeah and supervisiion wouldn't have been implied at all... im sorry.
And you are right, I'm not saying I did it right, or he did it right, we both messed up, and that's that. Pepole have sex like that okay... why do you think there are girls who are 16 and pregnant? It happens.

[confoozed]

And if this attitude carries into the Courtroom OP is going to lose. Sad, but true.

I see NOTHING in his past that keeps him from visiting with his child - nothing. Supervised, perhaps. No visitation? No.

And, as we "regulars" know, the Court will decide who is BEST suited to parent.

I'm obviously not going to be arguing to a judge like I am with you two, I'm not an idiot. Thanks though.

[confoozed]

Sorry, but, no, not all people have sex with people they've known for 4 months. You are lucky that all you "caught" was pregnant.

And, yes, you know, I DO look at every man I'm considering being intimate with as a possible father for my possible child and I DO ask questions and decide if a person is truthful or not - or at least I try.

If you DON'T, you are, quite frankly, a fool.

Everyone makes mistakes. Stop putting "everyone" in the same category of having recreational sex at some point in a 4-month relationship. Speak for yourself - not for me.

This man is problematical, to say the least - and you are having a child with him.

And I'll repeat - keep wearing blinders, get into Court, have the Judge ask you about your relationship and look like more of a fool.

And you've never misjudged anyone in your life right? That's why all your relationships worked out... haha. Okay.

[ScottGem]

pepole have sex like that okay...why do you think there are girls who are 16 and pregnant? it happens.

Getting off topic, but yes I am painfully aware if that, but I will continue to carry on my fight against it as best I can.

[confoozed]

Getting off topic, but yes I am painfully aware if that, but I will continue to carry on my fight against it as best I can.

Everyone's agreeing with you that its wrong, so really there's no need to fight.

[JudyKayTee]

and you've never misjudged anyone in your life right? thats why all your relationships worked out...haha. okay.

We're not talking about me. We're talking about YOU and your baby and the father with a criminal history. And, no, I don't have any children with people with criminal records.

If I want your advice, I'll open at thread.

"Haha." How old are you?

[JudyKayTee]

im obviously not going to be arguing to a judge like i am with you two, i'm not an idiot. thanks though.

"Obviously" you aren't going to argue. How does "obviously" come into this? I see you fighting tooth and nail to prove you are right. I don't think attitude changes when you walk into the Courtroom.

No one ever said you're an idiot. That's for you to prove or disprove (which, actually, is a word).