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SadMomto4 · Aug 29, 2011, 08:26 PM

I need answers to many questions. I'm have to rep. Myself. I do not want a divorce and want to work it out with my husband. I am researching on how to do everything to prolong the entire process and cause his retainer to run out quickly. I just don't know about do I need to have him served with my counter-affidavits and if so, do I have to pay for all of this? I have more questions but one at a time. I desperately need help. I am a wreck and will do what it takes to at least try to work this out. I just can't dissolve my marriage without knowing I tried. My kids deserve that.

smoothy · Aug 30, 2011, 06:19 AM

You can try but it won't do any good... because either party has the right to a divorce if they want out of the marriage. The man OR the woman equally. This isn't the Middle east. Nobody HAS to work it out if they have no desire to, or stay in a marriage they don't want to. And from what you say... he has no desire to work it out.

Where you really WILL need the legal advice... and legal help will be the division of assets, Alimony, Child support and child custody.

RavenWolf1 · Sep 2, 2011, 05:03 AM

Do yourself a favor... if you have children, hire an attorney. At least if you want to see the kids and have your spouse pay their fair share. For $200 or less you can hire an attorney. If you lose, you will have to pay court costs and attorneys fees. However, if you win, your spouse will have to pay this money.
Yes, you may have to go through mediation, but... keep in mind... the kids love your spouse. Regardless of the reason for the divorce, your children love both parents equally. Don't bad mouth or be disrespectful to your spouse in front of your children. If your friends or other family members start to say things about it, ask them to please refrain. Your kids don't want or need to hear this. This is between two people and ONLY two people. Don't involve others. Your kids are already scared (though they will never admit it.) Let's not freak them out any more than they are already. Be kinds to each other. Respect that perhaps you need to go separate ways. And put the children and their emotional health first. The more respect you give, the better it is for the kids. If you must fight, make sure that the kids are not within 1 mile of earshot. (That means, don't go to another room... go to a field across town, or keep your mouth shut.) The best thing you can accomplish is future happiness. If you're bickering... the kids will know it. They have eyes... and ears.

excon · Sep 2, 2011, 05:10 AM

Originally Posted by SadMomto4

I want to know how to do everything to prolong the entire process and cause his retainer to run out quickly.

Hello Sad:

I understand what you're trying to do... But, you'll NEVER accomplish it the way you're going about it... In the first place, you're a rookie going up against a professional... You CAN'T win. I don't care HOW much help you get, YOU CAN'T WIN!! It's like trying to hit a 98 MPH fastball. It AIN'T going to happen...

So, if you want to save your marriage, DO SOMETHING ELSE! What, I couldn't say.. My expertise is LAW - not marriage.

excon