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paxe · Aug 29, 2009, 02:14 PM

Originally Posted by jmjoseph

More guys nowadays like women with a nice body, but not THIN. Thin women don't have nice bottoms.

I never said that we don't like form, I love form with a thin body and most guy do. We don't especially like overweight women in general.

mudweiser · Aug 29, 2009, 04:21 PM

Originally Posted by paxe

I never said that we don't like form, I love form with a thin body and most guy do. We don't especially like overweight women in general.

Unfortunately, most heavy women forget that they indeed are heavy and decide to clothe themselves in a manner that is not flattering;

Here is an example of a woman who knows how to dress for her "size"

Dare I say...

No one likes to see a the muffin top or just too tight clothing.

The best route to go is to find clothes that fit you well! Even a size 2 person can choose the worst of outfits.

I believe that love does start with looks-- the guy/girl does have to be attracted to you to begin the whole process!

Why not increase your chances of finding love with just getting a better wardrobe-- besides you'll feel sexier and more confident with clothes that don't cut your circulation or you have to keep fixing every now and then.

Sarah

jmjoseph · Aug 29, 2009, 04:41 PM

Sarah, I had to spread the rep. but you are absolutely right about women wearing the right clothes for their size. And the plus sized model in those pictures is really my type( if I wasn't married, I only have eyes for my wife now). I don't like the bottom picture though, maybe it's the dress...

When my wife and I got married, she was a size 6. Now after two kids, and my cooking( I cook a lot and I use real ingredients... like butter) , she is a size 14. I love her the way she is regardless, and like her better with some more meat on her bones. I have particularly enjoyed the extra boob weight. She is losing weight now for health reasons and her self esteem. She knows I'll love her no matter how she looks. But will cook more cobbler, pies, and the like if she gets too thin.

GOD made women all sizes, and men to love them. Isn't it great how that works?

none12345 · Aug 29, 2009, 06:52 PM

Basically I think most guys would like a girl that is not skinny and not meaty. Just the right amount. I do believe that personality is more important than looks but at the same time there is more to attraction than just personality.

For me I have an image of the perfect girl but than again perfection is in the eyes of the beholder. I am sure there is at least one person or even tons more who will see you as the perfect person.

But then again I don't think being too shallow is a good thing because then you might not find the person you are looking for. Anyway I'm done blabbing LOL.

amicon · Aug 30, 2009, 01:51 PM

We re all individuals and attracted to different looks personalities etc etc.So what works for you works for you.:-) healthy s nice I think!

artlady · Aug 30, 2009, 02:32 PM

Originally Posted by jmjoseph

Sarah, I had to spread the rep., but you are absolutely right about women wearing the right clothes for their size. And the plus sized model in those pictures is really my type( if I wasn't married, I only have eyes for my wife now). I don't like the bottom picture though, maybe it's the dress....

When my wife and I got married, she was a size 6. Now after two kids, and my cooking( I cook a lot and I use real ingredients... like butter) , she is a size 14. I love her the way she is regardless, and like her better with some more meat on her bones. I have particularly enjoyed the extra boob weight. She is losing weight now for health reasons and her self esteem. She knows I'll love her no matter how she looks. But will cook more cobbler, pies, and the like if she gets too thin.

GOD made women all sizes, and men to love them. Isn't it great how that works?

Go light! Or as advertised "lite"!

This is a challenge that I have come to embrace.I am trying to eliminate the unnecessary fats and sugars and many things. It isn't easy to do at first but simply using applesauce instead of oil in a cake mix,is a good thing.

There are many substitutes these days that are better for you and don't have to impair the taste.

Heart disease,high cholesterol,all of those things you don't want in your life can be prevented to some degree.Heart disease in the number one killer of women,in the U.S.

If people have children it is vitally important to begin to keep their arteries clean now!

Diet has also been a factor in colon cancer.My brother lost his battle with it and ironically,he was a very renown chef and cooking teacher.

All of the food he cooked,he tasted while it was cooking.

Sorry for high jacking the thread :rolleyes: Really!

paxe · Aug 30, 2009, 03:27 PM

Starting a meal with a huge salad helps a lot. Lost 22 pound like that.

artlady · Aug 30, 2009, 03:35 PM

Originally Posted by paxe

Starting a meal with a huge salad helps a lot. Lost 22 pound like that.

Exactly! Every little bit counts and just filling up on salad instead of bread is a great choice.
If you simply cut out little things,it can have a huge impact!

CFZD · Aug 30, 2009, 06:43 PM

OP,

It doesn't matter! Being a woman, you always need to take care of yourself. Eat healthy, work out regular and maintain a good circle of friends. You can go to the gym with your friends forming a routin (e.g 4 times a week). But you don't do this for the men, you do it for yourself!

kctiger · Aug 31, 2009, 08:50 AM

I know everyone on here has done a wonderful job of answering the OP's question so I will not pretend that I have anything profound to add.

For me a women who is confident and above all good hearted can make up for any potential flaw she may have physically. No one is perfect and we are all attracted to what we consider beauty. The good thing about beauty is that if you pick the right kind, it lasts forever. There are tons of guys who love all sorts of gals, and vice versa. I am always amazed to find a girl that can actually put up with me... that is a girl that I want to get to know!

To the OP, just be happy with yourself and know that ALL women are beautiful so long as that beauty starts with their heart!

I wish · Aug 31, 2009, 09:02 AM

Bottom line is it depends on the person's tastes; however, you can't control the person tastes.

But you can control your feelings and your appearanc. The important part is that you are comfortable with your personality and your physical appearance. Once you are comfortable with yourself, you are in a better position to look for someone who will accept you for you.

crisluvsu731 · Aug 31, 2009, 09:53 AM

Well, I am a big girl, but I am told that I'm "pretty for a big girl" what is that suppose to mean? And if a guy hollers at me and I ignore him, I am a "fat bi**h. It just got me thinking why guys go more for the skinny ones.

kctiger · Aug 31, 2009, 09:57 AM

Some guys will go for anything that means a quick lay... not all of us are like that.

Stay true to yourself and if someone can't accept that then they don't deserve you. If a guy can't accept you on your worst day he sure as hell doesn't deserve you on your best.

crisluvsu731 · Aug 31, 2009, 10:13 AM

Thank you for that kctiger.

Jake2008 · Aug 31, 2009, 10:14 AM

Cris,

Don't judge all men by the boorish few. I've dated all sorts of men, fat, skinny, all kinds of interests and occupations, and the one I ended up with for 33 years and counting now, is sort of a combination of all of them.

There was a time in his life he would have dated a tall leggy blond with no butt and big knockers, and little between the ears, and was oblivious to me, the tree climbing, bike riding no makeup gal down the street. Then he grew up and realized there was more to a long term relationship than physical characteristics, started dating me, who's been up and down 30 pounds overnight, and all the really important things saw us through all these years.

Don't make time for people who judge people. For any reason, but particularly the shape you happen to be. And don't think that you aren't noticed either. If you come across as being less than worthy, or without confidence, men will pass you buy.

Negative people I avoid at all cost. I pick up on that easily, and there was a time where I thought it was directed to me, but it wasn't. It's just the way some people are, so don't let them penetrate that confidence, and tear down your self-worth. Let them go tear somebody else up, you stay strong. Pick people that are good for you, love you, enjoy your company, and that have a good sense of humour, and you them.

It is a waste of time to give of yourself to those that do not appreciate you for who you are. That may sound corny, but that really is the truth.

rosebud135 · Aug 31, 2009, 10:28 AM

I think that your just talking about the jerks. The "oh i need a skinny perfect chick" When really, Phat is the new fad. (:
Im curvy and have had the same man for a year now. And I've also had lots of others and they liked my body the way it was. Just don't only talk about your body because they don't want to hear it.

crisluvsu731 · Aug 31, 2009, 10:31 AM

Thank you. I appreciate that. I definitely agree with that.

crisluvsu731 · Aug 31, 2009, 10:32 AM

Well, I am getting the gastric bypass surgery done in the next few months, I want to be healthy, but I don't want to be a tooth pick. I am excited.

Synnen · Aug 31, 2009, 10:41 AM

Cris,

I bet the guys you're dealing with are all under 25.

Sometime right around 25 they start getting brains and thinking with the BIG head instead of their LITTLE head.

Seriously--BOYS want the perfect thin girl. MEN want a woman with confidence.

So the next time someone tells you that you're "pretty, for a big girl", tell him:

"Thanks! You speak well, for an idiot!"

Jake2008 · Aug 31, 2009, 11:09 AM

A friend of mine had that surgery nearly two years ago now. I'll tell you, she is half the person she was, literally, and she's in shape, energetic, and feels really good about herself.

It is a very long haul though, I hope that you are well informed, it won't be easy to adjust yourself and keep to the rules.

Good luck to you, I hope you let us know how it all went.