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Alty · Mar 20, 2008, 04:35 PM

Hi all, sorry, I took a little nap with my daughter this afternoon, I haven't been sleeping well for the last few days.

Oh Allheart, you sweetheart, I don't know why those silly thoughts popped into my head. I'm usually such a confident person, but the last few days have left me wanting.

Is it okay for me to say this? I love you guys, you are true friends, I wish so much that we could meet at Starbucks every morning and talk in person, but the fact that you are all in my life is enough. I'm so grateful to all of you and for all your words of comfort and wisdom, you are all wonderful people, the cream of the crop, and I am proud to call you my friends.

starbuck8 · Mar 27, 2008, 12:14 AM

Dear Altenweg,

I don't think I can say much more than everyone else that has given their support has said. Your story made my heart ache for you, and I'm so sorry that you had to live with your pain for so many years.

I think by telling us your story, you just may have convinced some 'other' stubborn people to not be ashamed or embarrassed to go talk to someone about the things that haunt them.

I have my own story too, and just maybe it will give me the nerve and the push I need to talk to someone about it, so it doesn't have to be a part of my daily thoughts.

Allheart convinced me to go out and buy a journal too. I might need a case lot, but oh well ;)

My heart is with you, and I support you, as all the others do.

God Speed!

Alty · Mar 27, 2008, 07:04 AM

Starbuck - Thank you so much. If and when you are ready to tell us your story, we'll all be here to listen.

Like I said so many times already, writing this was really hard, probably the hardest thing I've done, but boy does it feel good to get it off my chest. A weight has been lifted, the burden really isn't as heavy as it once was. It's still there, but lighter.

Thanks again, and take care.

starbuck8 · Mar 27, 2008, 09:08 AM

Alt, I can only imagine how hard that would have been to write the letter. Something told you it was time. I'm so happy that the weight on you chest has lifted a bit, and that there are so many people here to give you a shoulder when you need one.

One of these days I might get up the nerve to tell my story. I just closed another chapter of my life, so one of these days it might be time to share the book, so to speak.

I wish you all the luck in the world to be able to put this in a place where it doesn't weigh you down anymore.

No thanks necessary, but you are welcome. Take care of yourself!

Allheart · Mar 27, 2008, 10:05 AM

And if I may pipe in... just getting to know the two of you Alt and Star... the huge good hearts the both of you have, be darn proud of the people you are today.

You both truly touch my heart... You both are special... and nothing, not yesterday, today or tomorrow, could ever take that away from either of you.

Hugs and kisses.

starbuck8 · Mar 27, 2008, 10:13 AM

Originally Posted by Allheart

And if I may pipe in....just getting to know the two of you Alt and Star...the huge good hearts the both of you have, be darn proud of the people you are today.

You both truly touch my heart....You both are special....and nothing, not yesterday, today or tomorrow, could ever take that away from either of you.

hugs and kisses.

Thank you sweet girl. You helped me a lot to get through this week and I'm forever grateful to you for that. :) Your words gave me the guts to walk in and kick some A$$, and get a little justice for myself, even though it wasn't the best outcome I had hoped for.

Hugs and Kisses back at you!

talaniman · Mar 27, 2008, 11:02 AM

Just found this post, and am amazed at the strength and courage, you have to overcome what you have, and be the person you are. Simply freakin' amazing, and a testament to what people can do with their lives, and my compliments on your choice, to be here for others.

Alty · Mar 27, 2008, 03:32 PM

Thanks Tal - That means allot.

It's weird, I still get weepy when I re-read my post, but the tears aren't gushing out anymore, it's more like a steady drip. That's progress.

News, I am going to see a therapist next week, I'll let you all know how that goes. I'm nervous about it. I don't know how well I'm going to do looking into someone's face and telling my story. Maybe I can just print my post and hand it to him. That would be easier.

Allheart, Star, Tal and everyone else - You are all so sweet. This site is amazing, filled with amazing people. I'm so glad that I found all of you and that you all accepted me. It means allot to me to be a part of this community, it really does. Thanks again for your kind words, they give comfort that is sorely needed.

startover22 · Mar 27, 2008, 03:41 PM

Ohh Alty that is great! And you know, this has been an eye opener for me, a good one!
Great idea to pring this off, only you will want to add anything you didn't here to it...
You made progress the first day you posted, and will still... You go ALty! Great job!

Alty · Mar 27, 2008, 03:47 PM

Thanks Starty. And thank you so much for being here for me. You truly are a remarkable person, you really, really are, I can't tell you that enough.

If I'm going to print this off and give it to the therapist, I'd better re-check it for spelling errors, don't want to look silly.:)

starlite1 · Jun 4, 2008, 05:47 AM

Hi Alty,

I am so very sorry for what happened to you. I wish I could reach through the monitor and give you a tremendous hug. You are so wonderful, and just know how proud I am to know you, and how proud I am of you that you are able to confront these things. I am so happy that you have a wonderful husband, and a sweet little girl. God Bless YOU and may have happiness always!

Love, Starlite (Karen) XOXO

Alty · Jun 4, 2008, 07:48 AM

Oh Starlite aka Karen, thank you so much for the heart felt post, it means allot. This thread was very cathartic for me, and I've made allot of progress since I wrote it, largely because of the people on this site, they're all such wonderful people.

I have a wonderful family, two wonderful kids, many wonderful pets (which keep me busy) and allot of wonderful friends, it helps tremendously.

I love your quote, and it is so true. I guess I'm able to handle it, although some days I don't think so, but so far so good, one step at a time, sometimes a step backwards, but most days I'm moving ahead.

Thanks again.

Alty aka Andrea :)

missunloved · Mar 25, 2009, 11:18 AM

I want to thank you so much for sending me this link I never thought anyone would understand
Or now how I feel

starlite1 · Mar 25, 2009, 11:21 AM

Hi Missunloved,

Welcome to AMHD! Everyone here is so great, as you will find. What's going on in your life that brought you to us?

missunloved · Mar 25, 2009, 11:24 AM

Growing up I was abused mentally and physically also sexualy and I'm just so confused about life and everythin I just need someone to talk to

starlite1 · Mar 25, 2009, 11:28 AM

I'm so sorry that all of these things happened to you. Nobody deserves to ever be treated like that, especially by people whom we should be able to trust. How old are you now?

missunloved · Mar 25, 2009, 11:31 AM

I'm 17

starlite1 · Mar 25, 2009, 11:35 AM

Are you still being abused? If so, honey, by who, and do you live where you are being abused?

missunloved · Mar 25, 2009, 11:38 AM

I am not anymore only mentally now they stopped that when I was 14 and got old enough to know it was wrong
I was abused by my dad, 2 older guy cuzins, my sister, and 2 younger but bigger guy cuzins
They all hit me and sexually did stuff to me to
Well my dad didn't do anything sexuall he just liked to hit me and shove me around and think it was OK but the rest all abused me sexually or raped me

starlite1 · Mar 25, 2009, 11:42 AM

Originally Posted by missunloved

i am not anymore only mentally now they stoped that when i was 14 and got old enough to know it was wrong
i was abused by my dad, 2 older guy cuzins, my sister, and 2 younger but bigger guy cuzins
they all hit me and sexually did stuff to me to
well my dad didnt do anythin sexuall he jsut liked to hit me and shove me around and think it was ok but the rest all abused me sexually or raped me

Honey, I am so sorry. Well as you know, this wasn't okay at all for any of them to do. NO WAY! Is there a way you can move out of where you are to get away from them? Also, have you even been to counseling?