[lisawood]

Hi,

I'm 33 and work full time in administration and study part time at university for a degree in Media Arts (web design/graphic design/photography).

Trouble is I have no idea what I want to do with my life.

I am recently separated, after a 10 year relationship, so everything seems uncertain right now, to the point I'm moving back in with my parents for a while. Not ideal, but necessary to pay off some debt.

I just don't know what I want to do. I have been in administration for a long time, and it's boring. I thought starting a degree in something I have had a small amount of experience in through work (design) would be the way to go, but I just don't know. I'm not thriving at my study. I get good grades, but that's it. I am looking forward to the photography component of the degree. I do like photography. It is perhaps a career I would like to enter, I just don't know. I'm 33 and feel like a failure and that life is a mess!

Any advice on how to find your path in life?

Lisa

[Wondergirl]

Well, I've been a grocery clerk, a physical therapy aide, a bookstore clerk, a soda jerk, a drugstore clerk, a State Farm bodily injury secretary, a teacher, a wife, a mother, a library clerk, a circulation (front desk) clerk, a reference librarian, a library cataloger, a resume and cover letter creator, a counselor, and a published writer. All my earlier work experiences honed my abilities with customer service or attending to detail or organization or typing or creation and design or childcare, and fed into and made me better at the later jobs I had.

And I still don't know what I want to do when I grow up.

The trick is to find joy in everything you do and to pull out of it everything possible to help you do well at the next job.

Your local community college or the college you are attending has a career office that offers interest and personality tests. Take them; they're free to you as a student. You would find them of value and get more information about who you are and your likes and dislikes.

[lisawood]

Well, I've been a grocery clerk, a physical therapy aide, a bookstore clerk, a soda jerk, a drugstore clerk, a State Farm bodily injury secretary, a teacher, a wife, a mother, a library clerk, a circulation (front desk) clerk, a reference librarian, a library cataloger, a resume and cover letter creator, a counselor, and a published writer. All my earlier work experiences honed my abilities with customer service or attending to detail or organization or typing or creation and design or childcare, and fed into and made me better at the later jobs I had.

And I still don't know what I want to do when I grow up.

The trick is to find joy in everything you do and to pull out of it everything possible to help you do well at the next job.

Your local community college or the college you are attending has a career office that offers interest and personality tests. Take them; they're free to you as a student. You would find them of value and get more information about who you are and your likes and dislikes.

Thanks wondergirl. I also know people who have done many different things. Most of my friends all know what they want to do in life, which I guess is why I feel so out of place. They are all in their 30's, have a career, partner, husband, wife, etc.

Here I am at 33, recently separated (not by choice), have an OK job but it's nothing special and I don't jump out of bed to get to it in the mornings, a degree which is OK, but I don't know if it will lead anywhere when I finish it, etc.

I guess everything is so up in the air. I don't know how to get clarity or certainty on anything. Probably because I thought I'd be a mother by now and that is what would be providing me the greatest joy in my 30's.

I want my ex partner and home back, our life back, only better. But he's already seeing someone else. I know we both have to grow. I can see where things went wrong. I don't even know if we could ever be together again. All I know is I do love him. I don't want anyone else. But I do want us both to be happy.

[Wondergirl]

I want my ex partner and home back, our life back, only better. But he's already seeing someone else. I know we both have to grow. I can see where things went wrong. I don't even know if we could ever be together again. All I know is I do love him. I don't want anyone else. But I do want us both to be happy.

That information puts a slightly different spin on your question. Since you were hoping for motherhood by now, perhaps working with children somehow as a volunteer (park district, library, homeless shelter, hospital) would give you an outlet for some of your feelings. Or volunteer and meet other people (guys?) at an animal shelter, hospital, library, etc. The more you are out and about, the more opportunities you will have to find that guy who is right for you. And I strongly urge you to take the interest and personality tests at the college career office.

[lisawood]

Thanks wondergirl. I am just not ready to get out there yet and don't know when I will be. Its been over 4 months since he left, but I have no interest in being with anyone other than him.