[jamesp]

I had been going out with my girlfriend for 10 months. I am 26 and she has just turned 22. She had been on a university placement in a nearby country for most of this time and we made a point of seeing each other every 2-3 weeks. In addition, we communicated at least once a day using an internet face-to-face webcam facility. The relationship has always been very close and the time we spent together was perfect in almost every way. Sure, we had little 'tiffs,' but these were resolved as quickly as they started. We frequently told each other of our love and enjoyed talking about the future together. I went out to see her for a fortnight a few weeks ago, and when we parted company we both knew that we had to concentrate on our exams, and that it would be a few weeks before we could see each other again. When we finally saw each other after the exams, I felt that something was different with her, and she explained that although she still loved me, the relationship was different. She has almost constantly been in some relationship or other since she was 14, and the lack of space may have been a contributing factor. I explained that the change of heart may have been caused by the stress of exams and the 4-5 weeks that we didn't get to see each other. I also maintained that what we had was surely worth fighting for, because we were so good together before. We have planned to go travelling together for 2 months this Summer, but at the moment she just wants to be friends. We are still going travelling together on this basis. She has reassured me sufficiently that there are no external factors involved, like meeting someone else for example. I have said a couple of times that if this was the case, I obviously wouldn't like it, but would move aside. I believe that if I give her some space now, she will probably figure out for herself what she is missing, and that the numerous walks on some tropical beach will undoubtedly sort the situation out to restore our relationship, so long as I just be myself and am not overly pushy. Am I right in thinking this based upon what I have said? Or am I just wasting my time?

[mckenzie134]

Spot ON!! GIVE SPACE

Do nothing probably been stressed and yourve been a bit clingy. Girls go like this after being in relationship they feel a bit crowded. Drop off don't answer all calls and cut talking everyday. Act a bit busier let her know you won't always be available. You said you talk ebery day STOP that if you want her don't worry sshe isn't going anywhere if you cut contact. Let her think about you Don't talk everyday that is noot helping you become a bit moremysterious she uisnt your whole life. She will love you more if she ant always get a holdof you give it a go for two weeks speak every 3 days. Don't care what you ssay but m,ake something up tell her anything working more doing something more just don't be there each night tewll her your too tired or anything think of something

[talaniman]

Long distance relationship are very hard on mature couples, and at your g/f's age, she wants to learn and explore herself and the new world with freedom. Make very sure the terms of this break are defined and agreed upon by you both. I think both of you should be able to enjoy your young lives, without the burden of promises you might not want to keep later.