[Wondergirl]

Unrequited love can actually be a very beautiful and inspiring thing.

And inspire thoughts of suicide or cutting or other self abuse. It is also a topic for heartrending poetic ululations.

Unrequited love is a ridiculous state, and it makes those in it behave ridiculously. ~ Cassandra Clare

[garboozle]

Why would you wish someone be as twisted as you are? Oh thats right, you don't believe you are twisted.

I'm not. I'm not hurting somebody or even myself for that matter. How is what I'm doing twisted? I'm not trying to be combative, I'm just encouraging someone to save themselves for someone that they LOVE.

[Wondergirl]

I'm not. I'm not hurting somebody or even myself for that matter. How is what I'm doing twisted? I'm not trying to be combative, I'm just encouraging someone to save themselves for someone that they LOVE.

But the love is not returned, so why waste her life pining for something that will never be? NO, it will never be!

[garboozle]

But the love is not returned, so why waste her life pining for something that will never be? NO, it will never be!

Well if she is her best friend they obviously have some sort of relationship and if the attention/slash way he treats her makes her feel so great, then I don't recommend her abandoning her hopes. Besides some people have such an intense longing for one person other people don't even appeal to them. And there is ALWAYS hope that it will be I mean, people change all the time. Somewhere down the line this guy may think to himself, "This girl really likes me and seems awfully nice, maybe I should try being in a relationship with her.

[Wondergirl]

Somewhere down the line this guy may think to himself, "This girl really likes me and seems awfully nice, maybe I should try being in a relationship with her.

He's already thought that and has discarded the idea. She is wasting her life thinking it will happen again. She is an incurable romantic, by the way, whose main concern is herself, not him

[garboozle]

I don't know, she seems to care about him pretty deeply by what she says.

[Wondergirl]

I don't know, she seems to care about him pretty deeply by what she says.

So? He doesn't care about her in the way she wants him to. Even being friends is not a good idea right now.

I care deeply about Johnny Depp, but it isn't getting me anywhere.

[talaniman]

How long does a person hold false hope that the object of your affection changes the way they feel and fall in love as you so desperately want? Its not healthy for anyone to NOT accept reality.

You may be willing to compromise YOUR dignity and self respect for the crumb and illusion of a one way love, but don't suggest it to others especially when it causes them pain, and misery and harm to themselves.

[JudyKayTee]

Don't worry, WG, Brad Pitt hasn't returned my calls, but I am still hodling out hope.

Garboozle, if you read through your questions and answers you seem unhappy and uncertain in your personal life. Why would you wish that on anyone else (as "Tal" said so eloquently)?

You are all over the place with your emotions - you question your employment, your future, and then you make comments like this one: "Well she IS the top priority, leaving the country was an exaggeration If I were with her I wouldn't care less about the state of the economy. ."

You are giving up your beliefs, feelings, thoughts in order to pursue your "undying love" for a person who very obviously does not love or even like you in return.

[Wondergirl]

Don't worry, WG, Brad Pitt hasn't returned my calls, but I am still hodling out hope.

Do you think we should switch to Sean Connery?

[Homegirl 50]

To continually pine after someone who does not feel the same way about you is just dysfunctional. Why would a stable person do that. Yo know this guy does not love you. You need to get some counseling. The function and happiness of your life should not depend on another person. You are coping out of life and using this guy as an excuse and it is not attractive in the least. It is pitiful desperation.

[garboozle]

Garboozle, if you read through your questions and answers you seem unhappy and uncertain in your personal life. Why would you wish that on anyone else (as "Tal" said so eloquently)?

You are all over the place with your emotions - you question your employment, your future, and then you make comments like this one: "Well she IS the top priority, leaving the country was an exaggeration If I were with her I wouldn't care less about the state of the economy. ."

You are giving up your beliefs, feelings, thoughts in order to pursue your "undying love" for a person who very obviously does not love or even like you in return.

I'm not wishing it on someone I'm simply telling her to follow her heart, as Lao Tzu says "At the center of your being you have the answer; you know who you are and you know what you want."

Aren't we all a little uncertain in our lives? You can't blame someone for trying to better their career and achieve higher education or for worrying about the US economy given it's current state, I mean come on.

Not sure about the OP but in my case this "unrequited" love has positives. I have two arduous twelve hour shifts ahead of me, but I know I'll get to see her Friday night and I greatly look forward to it. It gives me inspiration, motivation and hope because I know how happy seeing her will make me.

[Homegirl 50]

I'm not wishing it on someone I'm simply telling her to follow her heart, as Lao Tzu says "At the center of your being you have the answer; you know who you are and you know what you want."

Aren't we all a little uncertain in our lives? You can't blame someone for trying to better their career and achieve higher education or for worrying about the US economy given it's current state, I mean come on.

Not sure about the OP but in my case this "unrequited" love has positives. I have two arduous twelve hour shifts ahead of me, but I know I'll get to see her Friday night and I greatly look forward to it. It gives me inspiration, motivation and hope because I know how happy seeing her will make me.

Seeking to better your career or get a higher education is way different from wasting your time drooling after a person for whom the feelings will not be returned. That is a waste. What if there was a person out there just waiting for you to notice them and you could be happy? Or are you afraid to have a real honest to goodness relationship? I think you are coping out too. You are afraid and insecure so you are doing the easy and in my opinion pitiful thing.

[garboozle]

Deep down inside I feel like I can do this, I can get this person to like me. I'm good looking, charismatic (despite how I come across in the forum), and I spend a lot of money on her, which shows I'm caring and loyal. I don't know if there is someone waiting for me to notice them or not but what I do know is that I'm not really attracted to anyone else at this point. I'm not afraid of an honest relationship as I have been trying to start one with this person for over a month now! It is not easy, there are times this whole thing drives me to tears or gives me a headache.

[Wondergirl]

I spend a lot of money on her, which shows I'm caring and loyal.

No, it doesn't. It shows you are trying to buy her affection.

[Homegirl 50]

Deep down inside I feel like I can do this, I can get this person to like me. I'm good looking, charismatic (despite how I come across in the forum), and I spend a lot of money on her, which shows I'm caring and loyal. I don't know if there is someone waiting for me to notice them or not but what I do know is that I'm not really attracted to anyone else at this point. I'm not afraid of an honest relationship as I have been trying to start one with this person for over a month now! It is not easy, there are times this whole thing drives me to tears or gives me a headache.

You need to wake up. You are looking like a desperate man and that is not attractive, I don't care how much money you spend. Why put yourself through that agony? Get some counseling.

[garboozle]

Again, despite how I come across here, I'm pretty good at masking my desperation. I guess I may come across as a little desperate to her, with how much money I give her and for the periods I spend just waiting for her to talk to me. Some people see it as desperation I see it as dedication. I think counseling would be a little extreme.

[talaniman]

Give it a rest and keep in mind this is someone else's thread.

[Zea]

Again, despite how I come across here, I'm pretty good at masking my desperation. I guess I may come across as a little desperate to her, with how much money I give her and for the periods of time I spend just waiting for her to talk to me. Some people see it as desperation I see it as dedication. I think counseling would be a little extreme.

If you love her because of her beauty than "Fair is foul, and foul is fair."

[JudyKayTee]

My College major was English - I was taught that this means the fact that something is morally wrong does not make it legally wrong. The fact that something is well deserved does not make it right.

What is your understanding of the phrase?