[benice12]

Hello, I do not have words to put down here. I am married (2 yrs) and had got emotionally attached to a outside person (Guy).Even he liked me .We both liked each other. But since I felt its incorrect I ended my relation 6 months ago.

Till now he didn't remove me from FB, Gmail. But recently I found that I have been deleted from FB and gmail as well. I am so hurt and wounded inside. I felt like rejected and left alone and made me feel that I am worst person on this earth.

I know what I did has hurt in past but even I have gone through bad phase right? And what I did was was inevitable (even though it would hurt me) as I was completely attached to him. I am feeling like I am insane.

Please advise. Thanks.

[teacherjenn4]

You should be happy he moved on with his life. You are married and unavailable to him. You ended your relationship six months ago. Did you think he would wait on you forever?

[benice12]

You should be happy he moved on with his life. You are married and unavailable to him. You ended your relationship six months ago. Did you think he would wait on you forever?

Thanks for your reply jenn.
Yes I know all that I should be happy .But if that was the case the why he didn't remoive me from FB and gmail after day when relation ended... or say 1 month after.
Why now?. whats the reason.. I feel as if I am left out..
Also what should I do come out of this?. I am feeling I am very bad person and insane! Hating myself to the core..

Also besides that I feel I am have become a bad person in his eyes.. :(

[teacherjenn4]

Also besides that i feel i am have become a bad person in his eyes..:(

Why do you care if he deleted you or feels you are a bad person? You are supposed to be committed to your marriage, not worrying about what this guy thinks about you. Are you more worried about the guy or your husband?

[JaeBeam]

You need to block this other person, and then unfriend them. Then unsubscribe from any and all feeds of mutual friends.

Perhaps even delete your FB page, and make a new page for your husband and yourself. I'm assuming you want to remain married.

FB is the devil when you are having relationship issues.

[benice12]

Yes you are right.. I am not supposed to care.
But I am caring because all that happened because of me.. just me.
It was me who made him attached to me by speaking more and spending more time.So I when I ended I explained saying that we can't be friends also..
I told politely but may be I ended suddenly hence it has hurted a lot.
Believe me after I ended till date I also have suffered mentally for being hurting some one so badly.
I am such a person who always believes in helping others and today I look like a devil..

You need to block this other person, and then unfriend them. Then unsubscribe from any and all feeds of mutual friends.

Perhaps even delete your FB page, and make a new page for your husband and yourself. I'm assuming you want to remain married.

FB is the devil when you are having relationship issues.

Thanks Jae for your reply.
You are very correct regarding FB.
I am also feeling now that its just waste of time.
All things portrayed are just an illusion... no ones life is free of problems but FB shows just the hapy part of it.

Why I felt bad was he could have deleted before also.. I would that thought he hates me anyway.. but recently after I messaged him.. he didn't respond and then deleted suddenly.. I was shocked and then felt now I am treated no less than a stranger.

[Homegirl 50]

You need to stop worrying about this guy. He probably removed you because he is over you and has found someone else.
You need to work on your marriage and forget about him.

[benice12]

As of now I am feeling very bad for hurting him so much.
He is very good person and I behaved like untrust worthy and insane.
Guilt is killing me like anything...
I feel like I lost someone close and I got a curse from him since I hurted a naïve person..

I have bcome wicked in my own eyes.. now

[teacherjenn4]

I don't know why you are worrying about him. Fix your marriage and yourself. I bet he isn't thinking about or worrying about you.

[Homegirl 50]

Your sin was adultery. He's a grown man and made his own decision.
He has moved on now you need to work on your marriage.

[benice12]

I never had sex with him.It was a pure emotional attachment.
Hence cannot be called as adultery(as it involves sex.. as per dictionary meaning).
So I have one question.According to you by cutting off completely with him was not a mistake I did(hurting him by ending).Was it a right thing to do?
I had told that we can't be friends since we were more than that.

Please comment

[Homegirl 50]

Yes cutting it with him was the right thing to do. Do you worry this much about your marriage?
This guy has moved on and so should you.

[benice12]

Thanks for your prompt response.
Yes I don't know why I am not thinking much about my marriage.Rather I am finding guilty for making him hurt so much that probably he removed me from all contacts,my snaps and what not.
I also donot know why I am this way..
But I would really thank all of you people who have been replying me on this issure of mine due to which I am feeling that I am cared about.I am really thankful.

I have been suffering mentally for past 6 months now.I have got health issues as well.I prayed GOD to forgive me as well But I am getting better no where.

[Homegirl 50]

This guy has moved on. Why don't you do some counseling to help you get through this. You should me concerned about your marriage. Are you happy in it?

[benice12]

I am not sure whether I am happy or not.(My answer is nt 100% yes)
But I know that my husband is good person.
My marriage was an arranged marriage.. and happened so quickly.Later I didn't like his family at all as my brought up was very diifferent(I am well educated and girsls are given equal importance).It is way too different.
I was angry with my parents since they didn't even think about how would I live there.
Initial 1 year I never shared my feelings with him.After 1 year I sharted speaing out.. But till then I had got some one who showed more care and for my entire life I was waiting for a person(anyone) who gives me lots of love and care..
I know this seems too bookish :)
So in first 1 year.. I started to interact with this guy and I was very comfortable in spending time.. Now also I am in middle of no where.

Thanks for your patience in reading this awful story of mine.

[Homegirl 50]

It sounds like your husband is a nice guy but you are not happy or in love. This is why you are thinking about this guy so much.
I don't know how you feel about divorce but if you don't do some counseling with your husband to try and fix things, why are you staying married to a man you don't love?

[benice12]

You know.. he didn't delete me in FB till now.. but on his special day I wished him through FB message(Not posted on wall but a message).Then over next day I wasn't there in his list... :(

[Homegirl 50]

He does not want to hear from you anymore. He is moving on. You should do the same.

Why are you still with your husband?