[nellyjoanna]

Hi friends,
I am 23 years old girl from sc caste. I am in a relationship with a guy of 26 from nadar caste. We are in love for the past 9 months. We are Christians and our parents are spiritual leaders. He is working in foreign. I am living in my home town. I am waiting for my studies to get over. His parents are seeing bride for him . He has a younger sister so they are searching for her first from the same caste. We want to marry but from my home there is no objection for inter caste marriage. My father is sc my mom is nadar. My brother is married to a pilamar. (arranged marriage) but the matter is the guys parents are very stubborn in same caste. We want to make them convince. He love me so much but he often tells me that only if parents accept I can marry you . It hurts me a lot .but at the same time I know that he cannot live without me and we had a very close relationship . He respect his parents and he tells that we need their blessings. Of course we need their blessings but how to make them accept ? Please give me suggestions . How can I make him to be strong

[JudyKayTee]

hi friends,
I am 23 years old girl from sc caste. I am in a relationship with a guy of 26 from nadar caste. we are in love for the past 9 months. we are Christians and our parents are spiritual leaders. he is working in foreign. i am living in my home town. i am waiting for my studies to get over. his parents are seeing bride for him . he has a younger sister so they are searching for her first fromthe same caste. we want to marry but from my home there is no objection for inter caste marriage. my father is sc my mom is nadar. my brother is married to a pilamar. (arranged marriage) but the matter is the guys parents are very stubborn in same caste. we want to make them convince. He love me so much but he often tells me that only if parents accept i can marry you . it hurts me a lot .but at the same time i know that he cannot live without me and we had a very close relationship . he respect his parents and he tells that we need their blessings. ofcourse we need their blessings but how to make them accept ? please give me suggestions . how can i make him to be strong

The cruel fact is that you cannot make any do or be anything - he may have two choices: defy his parents and marry you OR stay close to his parents and marry someone else.

I don't understand your culture. I truly mean no insult, but if everyone is Christian how do they justify picking and chosing between castes?

[nellyjoanna]

JudyKayTee
Thank you so much for your suggestions. They never consider their children happiness . They consider their relatives and their opinions . This is the reason for not accepting inter caste.

[shweta123]

I think u should think of marryiing such boy. Can't he think about all this before.

[JudyKayTee]

i think u should think of marryiing such boy. can't he think about all this before.

Did you read the question? She is thinking of marrying him. He is the one who has second thoughts because of his parents.

[Jerric]

Forget the Guy, Nadar's will never accept inter-caste Marriage with Parayar they Over react, will surely threaten that the whole family will commit suicide, They may marry with other Castes of the same Genre but not with SC, Recently My friend married a Mudaliar Girl(Love Marriage but accepted by both Parents after lotof struggle), Nadar boys will Never ditch their Parents Reputation for their own Pleasures, that's how they are been brought up, Most Nadar Guys know this and never get into a Relationship before their Marriage, My Community Elders could be some more open minded and linient at least accept Love Marriage between Own Community Pupils, Its totally true they will never care for the Child's likes an Passion, All they care is only about their Prestige and Reputation, Teachers and Religious Leaders are Even More Worse... lol... Funny fact is both my Parents are Teachers and also Religious Preachers.