[Mike5462]

I am 20 years old. My ex is 19. We have been dating for 5 years. We have a lot of memories together. She broke up with me on Sunday. She said she needs space but still texts me and calls me. She said she loves me but doesn't know if she wants me. Whenever she sees me she kisses me and hugs me. I'm very confused. She keeps telling me when she is with me that she wants me. But when we are not hanging out she says she doesn't know if she wants me. She tells me she loves me and that there is no one else in her life. I broke all contact with her today. I told her to only contact me when she wants to be with me. She replied with "Woah..." what should I do! I don't want to move on because I'm not that type of guy. 5 years is a long time and I love her so much. Help?

[talaniman]

5 years is an awfully long time, especially since all your teen years, and young adult life has been with each other. I admire your courage, you did the right thing for yourself, as she was weaning herself from you, and keeping you in her life without responsibility, or commitment to you. Dumped but available.

You said what you meant, now you have to mean what you say, leaving her alone, and take this opportunity to explore your own world, and see where you fit without her. Be aware that it will take a long time to break free from the bonds and attachments you too have formed. Old habits die hard, memories haunt us, and we find ourselves lost, confused, and in shock!

But it also a time to figure yourself out. Sorry guy but that was the good news, and the bad is it's a difficult thing to get use to being on your own without her. Break ups suck for sure. And its going to be miserable for a while, but you will find other ways to be happy on your own, and be a bettor person for it.

These stickies may help. Relationships - Ask Me Help Desk

[Mike5462]

Thanks. But why does she still hug and kiss me? Ita killing me.

[talaniman]

She does it because she can, that's why you disappear after you get dumped. Be grateful for the times you enjoyed, but go explore your options, and opportunities for good clean adult fun with other young adults.

Be a while before you realize there are better things for you.

[Mike5462]

Thank you guys. This is very hard for me.

[Mike5462]

I have been broken up with me ex girlfriend since Sunday. We were dating for 5 years. We were texting today and she said she wants to be alone but misses how we used to be. I want to ask her to go to the beach tomorrow. But I am confused on how to ask. Any help?

I need help guys :(

[Enigma1999]

Five years is a while to be with someone... It will take time for you both to get used to the idea.

Just out of curiosity, why did you break up?

[Mike5462]

We have been broken up for about 2 weeks now. We dated for 5 years. I broke all contact with her for about 3 days now. She texted me today saying she misses me. I miss her too. How do I go about this? Thanks.

[talaniman]

If she doesn't miss you enough to work things out and resolve your issues then you ignore her. Your supposed to miss each other after 5 years of history, but does that mean you act on those feelings?

NO. Not without something more solid than I miss you!

[HAZZA1998]

She obviously loves you. She might just want to see of you can live without her and if she can live without you.
I say give her some time and she'll want to get back together.