[Gillianna]

My daughter and son-in-law have been married for five years, the last year of which my son-in-law was made redundant, obtained work 200 miles away and commuted back to the marital home each weekend. He contacted my daughter by phone twice daily, but on the one occasion that she tried to contact him he was not contactable all night. There was a further occasion when he angrily asked if she was checking up on him and the marriage was going nowhere. At this time she was seven months pregnant - my daughter conceived three months after the initial forced separation. This was planned by them both. During the pregnancy her husband's personality changed dramatically and when asked if he was excited about the pregnancy said 'I'd prefer it if we were having a dog', suggested the name Lucifer or Damian if it was to be a boy, said 'I thought I was firing blanks' and other worrying comments. My distraught daughter moved back to our home two months before the baby was born. The husband had said he might change his mind after the baby was born. When he was being born he said 'maybe it'll come out with horns' and on taking a photo 'he looks like a little devil'. He only took a week paternity leave which was at the hospital and then for a night plus two days (not nights) at our house. He visited for a few hours on the three or four Sundays leading up to Christmas and there has been no contact since except through his solicitors (my daughter has started divorce proceedings as she is trying to obtain maintenance for her child and herself). He has changed the locks on his property making her homeless and also making it impossible for her to return to her employment after her maternity leave expires. Exactly what access rights does he have? My daughter is worried out of her mind, thinks he could be back on drugs (he is back with his old friends who all used to smoke cannabis and some still do). He has abandoned her and his baby and says 'I want to have an active role in the baby's future'.

[JudyKayTee]

If you are asking about a divorce it appears your daughter has grounds.

If you are asking about severing the father's rights to the child it is ALMOST impossible. At this moment they have equal "rights" to the child although by virtue of having physical custody of the child she controls the child.

It's time for her to file for divorce and get visitation AND support spelled out by the Court. If he's dangerous she has to PROVE it.

[Fr_Chuck]

Also actually he can claim he deserted him, He is the one still living in the home, she is the one that moved out. So in court, he could really be the one to claim she deserted him.

Depending on if they own or rent the home, if both names on one deed or lease. But normally she has full right to return back to her home, and merely go in.

[JudyKayTee]

I totally misread the question - this MUST be in the UK because the reference is to a "solicitor."

Agree with FrChuck in the US - but don't know about the UK.

Also confused by "he has changed the locks on his property ..."

[yourfriendbill]

There is probably much more to this story than we could possibly know, yet, as far as the one sided hearsay words from Woman's Dad, they are He said She said stuff and He may not even Know what it is that is going on from her end, as from my experience,(in Canada) if a Woman says something- it does not have to be proved, the authorities just take it as Gospel and the man has NO say after that. So no matter what the woman says, I would hope that somehow they would be encouraged and or MADE to GET TOGETHER and talk with a 3rd party present in order to resolve whether or not this guy is as BIG as a JERK as He sounds.
My heart goes out to this young lady and Her Child, I pray you 2 (and Dad) will find a real Joy in the birth and life of the Child God is Giving you to raise.:)
God Bless You and your future.

[JudyKayTee]

There is probably much more to this story than we could possibly know, yet, as far as the one sided hearsay words from Womans Dad, they are He said She said stuff and He may not even Know what it is that is going on from her end, as from my experience,(in Canada) if a Woman says something- it does not have to be proved, the authorities just take it as Gospel and the man has NO say after that. So no matter what the woman says, I would hope that somehow they would be encouraged and or MADE to GET TOGETHER and talk with a 3rd party present in order to resolve wether or not this guy is as BIG as a JERK as He sounds.
My heart goes out to this young lady and Her Child, I pray you 2 (and Dad) will find a real Joy in the birth and life of the Child God is Giving you to raise.:)
God Bless You and your future.

What? I'd like to know your experience in the Court system - this is not my experience of that of my friends and, yes, I work in Canada on occasion - or work in the US and testify in Canada.

And not everyone here is Christian and/or believes in "your" God. Please keep your legal comments on the legal subject.

[JudyKayTee]

"Someone" doesn't like a single answer - amazing.

[ScottGem]

The only desertion I see is the wife leaving the marital home. And that is iffy.

But the solution here is the wife filing for divorce and support.

The father still has equal rights to the child until the divorce is settled.