[Clarke_105]

Well, I was with my ex girlfriend for almost two years. She left me, cause I wasn't really truthful to her. I never cheated on her. Well after all of this, I did everything I could do get my ex back. She made her choice and she met someone. When I did everything I could to get her back she was unchanged. I was very upset, and it took me a while to move on.

When I did and I was just doing me, 4 month's later, my ex got in contact with me saying she missed me and she wanted to make sure she wasn't making a mistake. We ended up talking again, things looked like there we're going good. I thought thing's we're going to be good. We we're meeting up a lot, we we're having sex, and I did everything for her. So it was basically like we were. I was sleeping at her crib. One day I left her house, she told me she needed to do her for a bit, and focus on her self. When I thought my ex was done with this guy for good, I drove by her house and see him walking into her house. I got out of my car, I beat the hell out of him. I felt bad the next day it wasn't his fault.

She texted me a couple hours later saying I ruined her life, and she will never speak to me again. All I did was do everything for her, and she was playing me. She changed her number. Should I just forget about her, or give it time? One of her friends told me she talks about me. I don't know what's up with her.

[Xene19]

Hmm, it sounds like the situation might be a very difficult one to rectify, however I'm sure it is possible, you just need to decide what you want, whether you want her back, or whether you just want to get on with your life. There is some more information here

[Clarke_105]

We'll my ex changed her number and told me I f**** up for hitting him. I told her that,even though I regret hitting him.its not fair that she plays games with me.I want her back,so it could us like old times.she changed her number,n its been almost a month.I wonder if she'll get bak to me,n no what she's been doing is wrong.I don't even no if she's still talks to him.I just don't no what to do,she made me feel like it was my faultthat whole situation upset me

[Cat1864]

You need to move on. You should feel lucky that your ex just let you go and changed her number and that you aren't in jail.

It doesn't sound like you even stopped long enough to find out what was going on. You just reacted in a very violent manner. You're right it wasn't his fault. It was all yours and if this is how you react because of her, then you should not be anywhere near her.

Get your life in order and let her go. Get out and enjoy your life. Get involved in things that make you feel good and where you can meet new people and make new friends. Get to the point where IF she contacts you again, you won't answer the phone, listen to the message, read the text or email, etc.

I don't know if she played you or you played yourself, but the result is the same, let go, heal, and move forward.

For future reference, once a break up has occurred, things will never be the same with that person as they were before. There is no such thing as getting back what you had. Rebuilding a relationship is essentially taking the salvageable pieces and building a brand new relationship from the foundation up.

Heal and let go so that you don't allow the issues from this past relationship to affect your next one. Good luck.

[Clarke_105]

Thanks for the advice.it wasn't my fault though,she had no reason coming back if she didn't want anything with me right?I was told things wer dne with this guy,I slept at her house we made love and I did everything for her.then one night I see this guy walking into her house,that's not fair for me.thanks for the help

[Cat1864]

Like I said, I don't know what happened with them. I do agree that if she was playing you it wasn't fair to you. However, not fair doesn't mean you get to react without thinking. I think when you are calm you understand. It's remembering when you aren't that may need some work. Better to walk away with your dignity and self-respect in tact than to end up in jail with your future in jeopardy because of jealousy. No woman or man is worth that.

Good luck.

[Clarke_105]

Yeah you're right.thanks for the advice,it helped a lot.

I apologized to this guy,so it made me feel better. Yeah I suppose I deserve better n thanks for the help,n advice.

Any more advice from anyone,the more advice the better to help me

[talaniman]

You tried, it didn't work. You tried again, it didn't work... again. By all means move on and never look back, but work on that temper, and impulsive behavior, before something bad happens and you end up in trouble.

You got lucky this time and didn't go to jail, OR continue to be her fool.

[Clarke_105]

I miss that girl though.I don't no what to do,I know she's not over me she upset for what I did.she's my ex and this girl is somethingfir feels so right. I don't no

[LuckyChucky13]

Clarke,

We all make mistakes. You reacted impulsively and you realised it was not the best decision you could have taken at the time. It's OK, you can't undo the past, but you can learn from it and make sure you apply those lessons in the future.

Getting to the ex part: She is not an honest person. Like I said before, we all make mistakes and she may be making a mistake and will be sincerely sorry for it later on, but that shouldn't come at your expense. After four months of her not contacting you, she asks to see you again, lets you sleep over, sleeps with you - all the while never telling you that the other guy was still in the picture. Sounds like she was enjoying the attention she was getting from the two of you. Someone like that seems insecure and needs constant attention and reassurance. She needs time to grow and mature and learn to be honest with the people who care about her. By any means both of you are not perfect, and are prone to make mistakes, but mistakes should not come at the expense of others emotions and feelings. The best thing for you to do is to accept that she has made the decision to be left alone and go out there and find the person who will bring out the best in you. This girl didn't.

By the way, I know you're curious whether she's still talking to the other guy. Although it shouldn't matter to you at this point, I'll tell you what I think: If a guy gets beaten up by another guy because of a girl, you can bet your a** he's not the happiest camper with her and will always wonder what other lies she's been telling him. If that other guy respects himself and values himself, he'd have walked away and told her to get help. She's playing games that will end up causing pain to all parties involved.

Good luck buddy.

[Clarke_105]

Thanks.I hope she gets hers one day,that wasn't fair for me n it hurt.I just miss her,n it bothers me.

Me trying to get in contact with her n tell her how I feel would be the wrong thing to do wouldn't it be.cuz I still miss her,I love this girl

[Cat1864]

Clarke, there is a method for letting go called No Contact. We have a sticky about it if you want the long version. Short version is that it is ending all contact with your ex. No communications of any type (even de-friending on Facebook so you aren't tempted to check up on her status and not allowing friends to give you the latest news, too.) The idea is to give yourself time and space to heal and let go without the confusion and false hope that contact with an ex can bring.

Understand that you are going to have feelings for her which are both positive and negative. You were together for long time and those feelings don't disappear over-night. What you need to do is give yourself ways to let those emotions fade. Believe it or not, they will.

Get involved in things that help you feel good about you. Do new things and create new memories that she isn't a part of. Make new friends who don't know her. Catch up with old friends. Live in the present instead of the past.