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    Lovely33's Avatar
    Lovely33 Posts: 76, Reputation: 12
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    #1

    May 28, 2011, 01:03 AM
    Why do I only attract creeps?
    Hey guys, I have been wondering for a long time now, why I seem to only attract the creepy boys wherever I go-the gym, class, etc. I'm only 18 (almost 19) and it continues to be a pattern in my life. I am attractive, and down to earth. I am pretty much nice to anybody, but that's no excuse for only the creepy guys to like me. I am a funny girl, and love to make others laugh. Is it true guys don't like girls for funniness or something? Are they intimidated by me? I am a little independent, but seriously. Why me? What did I do to make these creepy guys think I want them hitting on me? Help Thanks!
    I wish's Avatar
    I wish Posts: 5,296, Reputation: 2030
    Family & People Expert
     
    #2

    May 28, 2011, 09:24 AM
    You can't control the guys who are attracted to you, but it's not too difficult to reject the creepy guys. Be nice and keep walking. However, the nice guys might be too shy to talk to you, especially at your age.

    Why not turn the tables and go up to guys whom you might be attracted to?
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #3

    May 28, 2011, 10:51 AM

    Just curious as to why you think all the guys that hit on you are creeps? The reasons for your thinking may be the heart of the problem.

    Regardless just say no. I imagine attractive girls say NO a lot.
    yaseera001's Avatar
    yaseera001 Posts: 7, Reputation: 4
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    #4

    May 28, 2011, 12:28 PM
    Aww honey perhaps you have a negative block about guys, maybe due to your past experience with a "creep" believe me there are great guys out there don't judge them by their covers, give them a chance- goodluck!
    Lovely33's Avatar
    Lovely33 Posts: 76, Reputation: 12
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    #5

    May 29, 2011, 03:35 PM
    Comment on I wish's post
    To be honest, I'm too shy.
    Lovely33's Avatar
    Lovely33 Posts: 76, Reputation: 12
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    #6

    May 29, 2011, 03:36 PM
    Comment on yaseera001's post
    No, just negative about the creepy ones. Haha. There has never been a good experience with one. If Im not attracted I won't pretend to be though
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #7

    May 29, 2011, 06:25 PM

    Why not start as friends and have fun to see if they are creepy or not? I mean, do you have to be attracted to someone for friendly conversation? Do you have to see them as dates to just be friendly Miss Shy?
    Lovely33's Avatar
    Lovely33 Posts: 76, Reputation: 12
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    #8

    May 31, 2011, 03:58 PM
    Well because most of the time you can just tell we won't be friends. Like once a guys opening line was "you got a boyfriend?" Yea, that's real charming. Haha. All I'm saying is I am friendly but the creeps always take it the wrong way. Why are attractive guys so timid?
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #9

    May 31, 2011, 04:31 PM

    We aren't!! :D
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
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    #10

    May 31, 2011, 04:50 PM

    Just because a guy has a corny opening line it does not make him a creep.
    Perhaps if you got to know on of those guys on a friendship level you may find one to be pretty nice.
    Maybe you are sending out "untouchable" vibes and only the creeps ignore them.
    I wish's Avatar
    I wish Posts: 5,296, Reputation: 2030
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    #11

    May 31, 2011, 07:47 PM

    Asking you whether you have a boyfriend is actually very direct and honest, not necessarily creepy. Here's a possibility: He just wants to know if he should keep some distance and respect your current relationship. But if you were single, it's fair game.
    Lovely33's Avatar
    Lovely33 Posts: 76, Reputation: 12
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    #12

    Jun 1, 2011, 11:18 PM
    Well, in that one instance, it was extremely creepy. He was watching me work out for about 25 minutes, and I tried to ignore it, but he then came up to me-had no manners, and just trust me it was incredibly rude and creepy. I completely understand being nice to these guys, but their vibes just give me goosebumps. If I give out the untouchable vibe, I don't mean to.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #13

    Jun 2, 2011, 08:02 AM

    Don't judge all creeps on the basis of just him. We are all different, trust me. Some of us are quite lovable once you get to know us, even though we may lack social graces.
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
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    #14

    Jun 2, 2011, 08:03 AM

    Some people are or appear to be a bit creepy but the world is full of different people. You learn to deal with it.
    What you think is creepy may not be so to someone one else.
    Maybe you don't notice guys you deem not creepy because you're too in-tuned to the "creepy" ones.
    Lovely33's Avatar
    Lovely33 Posts: 76, Reputation: 12
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    #15

    Jun 3, 2011, 01:22 AM
    No, I notice the uncreepy guys, the problem is, they aren't the guys trying. I don't know why not. I know some horrible girls who get the guys they want-but then again their morals aren't exactly the best. I just want a nice, cute guy. Is that so much to ask for. A guy that I like, who likes me.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #16

    Jun 3, 2011, 05:55 AM

    Be patient, and just do your own thing that you enjoy and have fun with people, family, and activities that you love.

    Talaniman Rule - When you stop looking for love, and build a life that makes you happy, you will attract people who want to share your happiness.

    Talaniman Rule - Date them all, short, fat, skinny, or tall. 18-80, blind, cripple, or crazy.

    The whole point is have fun getting to KNOW people. If you are open, the right guy will pick up on it. I mean you don't have to date a creep, but he may have some cool, fun friends.
    NeedKarma's Avatar
    NeedKarma Posts: 10,635, Reputation: 1706
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    #17

    Jun 3, 2011, 06:07 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by talaniman View Post
    Talaniman Rule - Date them all, short, fat, skinny, or tall. 18-80, blind, cripple, or crazy.
    I don't think I'll be imparting that advice to my daughter. I'd rather she use her judgement to selectively date good people who match her interests versus dating anyone who shows any interest.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #18

    Jun 3, 2011, 06:21 AM

    I told my daughter that dating was for fun, and getting to know people. 6 months of having fun you have a good idea about the romance part, and whether exclusive is a good idea. But then again she wasn't allowed to date until she was 18, but her mom over ruled me. But that's different with young adults over 18, and the creepy young nerds have a way of becoming solid partners as they mature.

    But I get your point.
    NeedKarma's Avatar
    NeedKarma Posts: 10,635, Reputation: 1706
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    #19

    Jun 3, 2011, 06:37 AM
    I guess that's where we differ, to me dating was always one person at a time.
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
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    #20

    Jun 3, 2011, 07:23 AM

    What is it you want the "decent" guys to do? What if a decent one approaches you and says Hello and says it the wrong way?
    May be they don't know how to approach you.
    Get to know guys on a friendship basis and enjoy yourself. The right one could be there and you don't even know it.

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