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debhuth2011 · Feb 20, 2011, 06:00 PM

My boyfriend has STDs and we are worried if it would be safe if he received head or if we decided to make love. Will that hurt either of us?

JudyKayTee · Feb 20, 2011, 06:17 PM

In one word, yes - STDs can be transmitted by oral sex as well as intercourse.

ISneezeFunny · Feb 20, 2011, 06:41 PM

... how old are you? I won't say, "Don't have sex until you're married," or anything of the sort, but I don't think you should be having sex at all until you know the risks involved, such as the question above.

debhuth2011 · Feb 20, 2011, 07:15 PM

My boyfriend and I r going to get engaged in feb. I am 24 going to be 25 in August. We want to start a family before we get married.

debhuth2011 · Feb 20, 2011, 07:16 PM

However... his case of stds isn't that bad.

ISneezeFunny · Feb 20, 2011, 07:20 PM

... what?

Since when is an std "not so bad?"

If it's chlamydia or gonorrhea, it's curable. If it's herpes, it's really not one of those things you take lightly.

Fr_Chuck · Feb 20, 2011, 07:36 PM

Yes, what type of STD, some will kill you, some can't be cured, and others can be cured.

But yes any sex act brings a risk that you will get it, less risk as long as you use protection, but condoms are not 100 percent.

ISneezeFunny · Feb 20, 2011, 08:14 PM

Just kind of shocks me because I've never heard of an std being described as, "not that bad."

Cat1864 · Feb 20, 2011, 08:49 PM

Debhuth, who told you that his case 'isn't that bad'? I highly doubt it was a doctor if you are here asking us about whether it would be safe for you to have sex (oral or vaginal) with him.

I get the impression that he might not know what he has or how bad the infection is. Either that or he is trying to convince himself and/or deceive you.

The ones that could even come close to being called 'not bad' are treatable. However, left untreated they can have major complications including sterility.

Herpes Simplex 2 can be dormant. It can also be still be transmitted when there are no symptoms. STD Facts - Genital Herpes

It is important to know that even if a person does not have any symptoms he or she can still infect sex partners.

HIV and Hepatitis are always dangerous.

If you get infected, any child you have could be at risk from several complications.

Talk to his doctor with him or your doctor and get the full story before you make a grave mistake.

JudyKayTee · Feb 21, 2011, 07:19 AM

Just for the record I am questioning the OP's original question about STDs. STD stands for SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED disease.

Wonder if SHE'S been tested?

Another thread on the effects of Chlamydia - woman having difficulty getting pregnant as well as other problems.

Chlamydial infection also greatly increases the risk of AIDS.

Question the wisdom of "going to get engaged" and getting pregnant first.

martinizing2 · Feb 21, 2011, 11:16 AM

You both need to be checked and treated.

I doubt either one of you has been checked, or
The doctor would have already answered your questions.

Speigal · Feb 21, 2011, 01:28 PM

All STD's are bad and if you have had sex then you are also probably infected - you may pass this infection on to any children you may - get treatment - I cannot that you do not know this at your age - If you are going to act like an adult (having sex) then you also need to be responsible.

smoothy · Feb 21, 2011, 05:10 PM

Sounds like a girl trying to latch onto a guy by getting knocked up rather than doing the smart thing and getting engaged and married FIRST... like he might move on if she doesn't. If he's worth having ababy with, he's worth marrying first. If he won't hang aroung long enough... the kids not going to stop him from leaving either.

I'm sorry, I know you say you're 24, but this sounds so much like its coming from a 14 year old trying to get out of their parents home its scary.

Anyone who treats STD's like something minor does so at their own peril.

Aurora_Bell · Feb 21, 2011, 06:45 PM

Why, would this be a case of a girl latching onto a guy? That doesn't really make sense. But I agree with the others, STD's are serious. Some worse then others, but why even risk it? Why isn't he getting treated for his STD?

smoothy · Feb 21, 2011, 07:18 PM

Originally Posted by Aurora_Bell

Why, would this be a case of a girl latching onto a guy? That doesn't really make sense. But I agree with the others, STD's are serious. Some worse then others, but why even risk it? Why isn't he getting treated for his STD?

The rush to get pregnant (just got to have that kid right now... can't wait)... before they can get married.

Harder for the guy to walk out with a baby to support. VS Getting married and THEN having a kid when they can afford it.

Because of a COMMENT the OP made... it will be #4 of page one.

JudyKayTee · Feb 21, 2011, 07:51 PM

I believe I addressed this on #10 - he has an STD and she either doesn't care or doesn't understand it or something. She is (for whatever reason) in a BIG hurry to get pregnant - even she is risking her health.

Of course, OP hasn't come back to fill in the blanks.

There are also LOTS of STD's out there. We don't even know which one she's talking about... and I don't know if she does, either. Whatever it is, she's certainly not getting treated and she either is or was his sexual partner.

Foolish all around, including the "going to get engaged" and "starting a family" part.

Aurora_Bell · Feb 21, 2011, 08:12 PM

I guess I just read it as the engagement --and the family idea-- was a mutual thing.

But your right, foolish idea to play with one's health and well being like that.

Too bad the OP probably won't be back to answer any of these questions.

JudyKayTee · Feb 22, 2011, 06:49 AM

Originally Posted by Aurora_Bell

I guess I just read it as the engagement --and the family idea-- was a mutual thing.

But your right, foolish idea to play with one's health and well being like that.

Too bad the OP probably won't be back to answer any of these questions.

I don't think it matters much if the engagement/family planning are mutual or not. Sounds like neither the poster nor the boyfriend is operating based on facts.

Of course, we'll probably never know.