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Can you help me understand?
My ex broke up with me a year ago. We have a 9 year old daughter. I have never love anyone like I loved him. We were together for 9 years: the first 6 years were long distance. We never married nor lived together but he is not the one to blame. At first, I was too young and wasn't ready to let go of my single life style. I've always believe there is time for everything: men and women should enjoy their youth instead of marrying at a young age. Anyway, during our long distance he cheated on me once. Soon after, I cheated as payback. However, I was not able to forget his betrayal and wasn't able to trust him the same. Later due to him wanting us to get together I ended up moving close to him and buy me more time. I was away from family and felt lonely and ended up accepting to marry him; although new I was still not ready. I was afraid to lose him. But managed to buy more time. Eventually he comes and breaks up with me. Later I find out it was for someone else whom he started a relationship with several months prior to our break up. So yeah he cheated again and to be honest I had a one night stand during the last year. I still can't get over the betrayal and I guess what makes it worse is knowing they are planning to get married. I don't know if its love or obsession but I can't seem to let go. I wish he would want to come back. I also feel too much anger towards her. I feel depressed and want his attention. We still see each other because our daughter.
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I hope you focus on being good parents for your child, because its obvious as relationship partners you are lousy together. What gets me is that after 9 years, and with all the cheating, and selfish games you both played, you are angry at him? Put this folly to rest because you were stalling for your own motives, and he moved on, so its time you do to. In time you will get over yourself and realize this relationship never was going anywhere, and you both share the blame in its failure. Now take care of the only innocent in this drama, your 9 year old. |
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So sorry to hear about the break up, but if you two couldn't get it together in 9 years, it wasn't going to work out. Is it possible that he finally just gave up on the prospect of you two ever marrying? As Tal said, you need to concentrate on raising your daughter and let him go. |
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