Check out some similar questions!

Koronue · Aug 5, 2010, 11:07 AM

My girlfriend and I have dated for about 6 months.

We broke up yesterday because of my girlfriends anxiety. She has problems with self loathing and low self esteem which is derived from her past.

The heart break steaming from all this is insane. I feel like I cannot deal with it at all.

She feels this is what she needs to get better and that if we were to stay together it would only bring me down. I know this is not simply a excuse to end things with me. I really believe she has a lot of issues she needs to work through..

I just do not get why we couldn't work through it together if I was willing to. She says she still loves me and I love her.. I just don't know what to do with the pain..

Cat1864 · Aug 5, 2010, 11:25 AM

If she is trying to work through her issues, she may want to make certain she isn't using you as a crutch to lean on instead of learning how to stand on her own two feet.

You love her and it would be human nature to want to take some of her pain and hurt away so she doesn't have to deal with it. Instead, you might end up adding to her issues if she feels the need to protect you from herself and piles guilt up on top of everything else.

It isn't easy, but try to live your life, heal and move on. Even if at some point in the future she comes back a stronger, happier, better adjusted person, you need to have healed your own wounds and unpacked the baggage before even entertaining any thoughts of being together again.

Hopefully, she is getting the help she needs to live her life to the fullest. Heal so that you can be a healthy partner for yourself and anyone else.

positiveparent · Aug 5, 2010, 01:03 PM

Leave her alone to sort herself out, she might get it together that way.
All you can do is try to move on.

lickemlolly · Aug 5, 2010, 01:40 PM

You may need to take a step back for a while and try to let her sort it out if that's what she wants... she may decide later that she wants you to help her but for right now she's trying to work things out by herself... respect that and let her do it... as for the pain... occupy yourself with other things... breakups are always worse when you sit around and do nothing but think about why you aren't together anymore... this may not be a permanent thing... patience is a virtue most lack.. give it some time give her some space.. and in the meantime get back to your life

talaniman · Aug 5, 2010, 08:25 PM

You may have been willing, but she isn't. Give her the respect of doing what she thinks is best for her. Right or wrong.

vanheart · Aug 5, 2010, 09:07 PM

Exactly, whatever the reasons. Anxiety or BS.

Let her be.

For you, rock on without the worry.

"She feels this is what she needs to get better and that if we were to stay together it would only bring me down"

Take heed in that.

Koronue · Aug 6, 2010, 07:52 AM

Thank you for all the advice people. I plan on giving her anything she needs. I won't say there is no hope for us in the future. If I love her the way I say I do, I will give her all the time and respect she deserves. She was a great girlfriend through and through. I will always have feelings for her.. she was there for me when I needed someone and now it is my turn to be there for her whenever she needs. As well as to give her the space she needs and not blare up her phone and email.