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    jolienoire's Avatar
    jolienoire Posts: 917, Reputation: 166
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    #41

    Jun 25, 2009, 07:42 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by l8onjones View Post
    This scenario has developed even further where it happens she says she doesnt know what she wants then she wants me, she said she doesnt want to settle down then she asked could we move in together.

    She says to leave her alone but she always gets back in contact with me I just dont understand it, My friend had a go at her and told her a few home truths and she said she wanted to be with me but now shes playing games again by ignoring me etc

    what am i meant to do?

    If you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always gotten and deserve! Leave her the hell alone, she is toying with you.
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #42

    Jun 25, 2009, 07:49 AM

    Yes she is toying with you. You need to take it to a different level and set a different tone to get different results. The trick is trying to figure out a plan that will catch her emotional blackmail off guard.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #43

    Jun 25, 2009, 07:55 AM

    I like the busy, but unavailable approach. You can politely distance yourself from her BS, no matter what her motives are.
    l8onjones's Avatar
    l8onjones Posts: 45, Reputation: 1
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    #44

    Jun 25, 2009, 10:24 AM

    That's exactly what happens she'll ring and ill say I'm out and she'll take it as I don't care, so she goes out and plays the mind games too, like when I went to tescos with my friend she'd rung to have a chat before bed but once she knew I was out she said I was just ringing to tell you I was going to bed night, now she has ignored me all day
    jolienoire's Avatar
    jolienoire Posts: 917, Reputation: 166
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    #45

    Jun 25, 2009, 10:29 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by l8onjones View Post
    thats exactly what happens she'll ring and ill say im out and she'll take it as I dont care, so she goes out and plays the mind games too, like when i went to tescos with my friend she'd rung to have a chat before bed but once she knew i was out she said i was just ringing to tell you i was going to bed night, now she has ignored me all day

    Do you not understand what leave her be mean? When someone ignores you it doesn't mean you annoy them.
    Forget about her.

    She is unsure about what she wants so you are just going to get hurt repeatedly,
    and I repeat.

    If you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always gotten and deserve! leave her ALONE, she is toying with you
    l8onjones's Avatar
    l8onjones Posts: 45, Reputation: 1
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    #46

    Jun 25, 2009, 10:39 AM

    Yeah but my point is I do leave her alone but she ends up texting me or ringing me or bugging my friends until I answer or sitting outside my house so what am I meant to do?
    jolienoire's Avatar
    jolienoire Posts: 917, Reputation: 166
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    #47

    Jun 25, 2009, 10:42 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by l8onjones View Post
    Yeah but my point is I do leave her alone but she ends up texting me or ringing me or bugging my friends until I answer or sitting outside my house so what am I meant to do?

    Block her text or change your number, tell her do not ask anyone about you, Tell your friends to ignore her and tell her to stop coming to your house without you inviting her. No matter how many times she call, text ask about you IGNORE HER, don't keep falling into her trap.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #48

    Jun 25, 2009, 01:03 PM

    Does this sound like a friendly rational person to you? Sounds like a psycho stalker to me.

    Tell her to leave you alone, and watch your back.
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #49

    Jun 25, 2009, 02:02 PM

    I agree with Joli and Talaniman
    You are reading too much into things if you think she would be a good girlfriend for you.
    l8onjones's Avatar
    l8onjones Posts: 45, Reputation: 1
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    #50

    Jun 25, 2009, 02:09 PM

    Im reading too much into things if I think she's a good girlfriend for me, meaning she's not?
    Or if I didn't read so much into things she would be?
    jolienoire's Avatar
    jolienoire Posts: 917, Reputation: 166
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    #51

    Jun 25, 2009, 02:11 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by l8onjones View Post
    Im reading too much into things if i think shes a good gf for me, meaning shes not?
    or if i didnt read so much into things she would be?


    She is not a good girlfriend for you obviously, if so you wouldn't be posting on this site about her indecisiveness.
    l8onjones's Avatar
    l8onjones Posts: 45, Reputation: 1
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    #52

    Jun 26, 2009, 07:42 AM

    Ah well I indirectly found out last night that she was texting and sending picture messages to the guy she kissed, serves me right as you all said I let her walk all over me so what could I expect
    kctiger's Avatar
    kctiger Posts: 3,653, Reputation: 1319
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    #53

    Jun 26, 2009, 07:43 AM

    So, I guess this means you have learned your lesson and will cut her out of your life right? I am not sure how much more you can take.
    jolienoire's Avatar
    jolienoire Posts: 917, Reputation: 166
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    #54

    Jun 26, 2009, 07:45 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by l8onjones View Post
    Ah well i indirectly found out last night that she was texting and sending picture messages to the guy she kissed, serves me right as you all said i let her walk all over me so what could i expect
    So, I hope you are going to leave her alone for good now.
    l8onjones's Avatar
    l8onjones Posts: 45, Reputation: 1
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    #55

    Jun 26, 2009, 08:05 AM

    Yeah she tried telling me it was her friends number, but as soon as I mentioned it she said it was you ringing him then was it, so makes it plain as day and she said where did you get the number from my phone bill? So his number must have been on there

    I don't want to give up, but I've been given no other choice :(
    jolienoire's Avatar
    jolienoire Posts: 917, Reputation: 166
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    #56

    Jun 26, 2009, 08:08 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by l8onjones View Post
    Yeah she tried telling me it was her friends number, but as soon as i mentioned it she said it was you ringing him then was it, so makes it plain as day and she said where did you get the number from my phone bill? so his number must have been on there

    I dont want to give up, but ive been given no other choice :(

    Stop snooping already it's over. Turn the volume up on your intuition and let it go bro.
    It's finito. Done.

    This is the time you should be trying to get yourself together emotionally, stop looking for things in which you already knew the answer to. You need to start healing.
    l8onjones's Avatar
    l8onjones Posts: 45, Reputation: 1
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    #57

    Jun 26, 2009, 08:15 AM

    I wasn't snooping at her phone bill we both looked at it to sort out the best phone plan for her, I can't believe she can be like this after calling me pathetic the other day because I said I was going to bed and ended up going to tesco for a drive with my mate because he had broken up with his long term girlfriend
    And this morning I received this text

    I have never cheated and if you hadn't rung at that time on that day I wouldn't have been on the phone to him. I think its pathetic that you did all that, shows you weren't accusing me because you were secretly checking up on me like you said? I'm a cheap worthless slut so leave me alone
    jolienoire's Avatar
    jolienoire Posts: 917, Reputation: 166
    Senior Member
     
    #58

    Jun 26, 2009, 08:18 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by l8onjones View Post
    I wasnt snooping at her phone bill we both looked at it to sort out the best phone plan for her, i can't believe she can be like this after calling me pathetic the other day because i said i was going to bed and ended up going to tesco for a drive with my mate because he had broken up with his long term girlfriend
    and this morning i recieved this text

    I have never cheated and if you hadnt rung at that time on that day i wouldnt have been on the phone to him. I think its pathetic that you did all that, shows you werent accusing me because you were secretly checking up on me like you said? im a cheap worthless slut so leave me alone


    She is doing the guilt trip, trying to make you feel bad. She called her ownself those things not you. Change your phone number, let her wonder what you are up to, don't even respond trust me. The more you do the more you are pissing her off.
    l8onjones's Avatar
    l8onjones Posts: 45, Reputation: 1
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    #59

    Jul 2, 2009, 03:01 AM
    Since all this there has been so much arguing and can not stand it one bit
    We now do not speak, she has been telling people I have cheated on her
    That I have set girls onto her, that I have given her number and email address out
    That I was meeting another person throughout the relationship

    I have asked her to talk about this but she won't, and its killing me
    I keep thinking of her with someone else and it tears me apart
    I think I'm fine and over it when I'm obviously not, I never did cheat or anything
    That she says how can I make her see that, and even after all this I still love her
    Why?
    l8onjones's Avatar
    l8onjones Posts: 45, Reputation: 1
    Junior Member
     
    #60

    Jul 3, 2009, 07:34 PM

    Tonight I got a phone call from the guy I was suspicious of
    Turns out she is going back to his tonight, so all you guys are right
    I've never felt so low ill be honest
    Shows I meant nothing and the words were hollow

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