[jleo3]

I met my boyfriend when I was 18 and he was 22. It took no time at all for me to recognize just how amazing of a person he is. It was even a little intimidating at first. I have struggled with weight for most of my life and never really developed the self-esteem required to pursue men. This one, in particular, I find very attractive, and I never would have though he would want to spend any time with me at all. Some may even say that he is "out of my league". Regardless, we hit it off right away and, four years later, our relationship has developed into something beautiful.
Despite the nice, flattering things he says to me, those insecure feelings I had at the beginning of the relationship still linger. I see him look at other women, and while I know that it's completely natural for him to do that, I compare myself to them and feel inadequate. When he talks to other women, even if I'm there and can hear just how innocent of a conversation it is, I feel nervous. For example, he was talking to his brother's fiancé about a TV show they both watch. I notice that they have something in common and fear that they will run off together, or that she will try to fix him up with one of her friends. I try not to express it, though, because I recognize how ridiculous that sounds.
At this point, insecurity has turned into jealousy causing frustration and fights. We really haven't had ANY problems up until now. I fear that it is all my fault and I am willing to do almost anything, as long as it saves my relationship. Any advice?

[N0help4u]

First stop with the insecurity, jealousy and fighting.
Realize that these things will break up a relationship faster than anything.
Most often jealousy and insecurity are only YOU and nothing to do with him and what he is up to. So realize that you are only your own worst enemy when you accuse him.

If you really want to know where he stands. Keep your mouth shut, change your outlook and watch and see what he actually is about. When you accuse a cheater they only hide it so best thing to do is keep your thoughts to yourself and watch for evidence. If there is none then you REALLY know it is your problem and he is innocent.

[I wish]

The problem is that you don't feel about yourself: personality and physical appearance. Why don't you work on those two aspects first. Be comfortable about yourself before worrying about your boyfriend. You should take priority over your boyfriend.

[jleo3]

Thank you very much for your timely responses.

I didn't mention in my original post that these fights have only been happening for a couple of days now. It just seems like a big problem, and I agree that I am the source. I'll just need to take a "chill pill" and work on my self-esteem. When I consider the good things I have going for me, it's easy to feel better about the situation. As I said before, he is amazing! We had a nice, long conversation tonight and everything seems to be okay. :)

[lilly701]

Thank you very much for your timely responses.

I didn't mention in my original post that these fights have only been happening for a couple of days now. It just seems like a big problem, and I agree that I am the source. I'll just need to take a "chill pill" and work on my self-esteem. When I consider the good things I have going for me, it's easy to feel better about the situation. As I said before, he is amazing! We had a nice, long conversation tonight and everything seems to be okay. :)

Good for you. I wish you well!

[VioletSkies]

Personally, I think that if he really loves you the way it sounds like he does, then it shouldn't matter to him. But if it really is bothering you and the two of you are serious about each other than you should have a conversation about it and see if he is willing to help you in any way that he can. Good luck sister!

-As long as you love yourself. The world will love you <3
----VioletSkies----