[karrera911]

My fiancé has found himself in a sticky situation with a girl that has come forward claiming to be pregnant with his child. He says that there is a decent chance that the child IS his, but the timeline is just close enough that it may not be.

However, the girl is planning on giving the baby up to a family member through an independent adoption. This has been the plan for the last several months, but now she is saying that the family can't afford the cost of the adoption right now and that he needs to sign a form relinquishing paternal rights after the baby is born. He would rather see the baby placed into the adoptive home (it is a significantly better situation than either he or the mother would be able to offer), but he is hesitant to acknowledge paternal rights for a child that may not be his when there is no promise of an adoption going though. The family assures us that it is only for legal purposes so that the adoptive family can assume guardianship and take the baby to doctor appts, etc and NOT so that they can collect child support.

We don't want to deny paternity altogether. We understand that there are benefits to knowing genetic parentage, especially should medical issues arise in the future. On the flip side, the adoptive parents (understandably) don't want to risk him having a flash of remorse in five years and pursuing custody of the child if it is his. We are looking for a form or proceeding of some sort that would both relinquish any paternal rights he may have on the baby WITHOUT acknowledging paternity, while the adoptive parents and mother of the child waive their right to pursue paternal responsibilities/child support. Is there such a form/set of forms, or do we need to consult a lawyer to have one drawn up? Could it be considered legally binding if we did have one drawn up and signed by all parties?

The baby is being born in Washington State.

Any insight you can offer is appreciated!

[stevetcg]

None of what you speak of can happen.

First, he is not allowed to relinquish parental rights unless there is an adoption. Second, he cannot relinquish parental rights until paternity has been established. This will happen in court. Third, the "adoptive parents" cannot adopt the child from JUST your fiancée. They would have to adopt him or her from both parents. Guardianship does not change anyone's legal rights.

Bottom line is that in order for anything to happen, first paternity will have to be legally established. Then, when the adoption is being processed, he can THEN relinquish his rights in order to clear the way for the adoption. Not until then.

[ScottGem]

When the child is born he should refuse to acknowledge paternity pending a paternity test.

The people planning on adopting will have to get a court to order the test. Until the baby is born and a paternity test done, nothing more can happen.

[karrera911]

Thanks, this is a very good starting point for us to go from! I appreciate the help!