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    annsumm's Avatar
    annsumm Posts: 31, Reputation: 1
    Junior Member
    		  
    #1

    Nov 29, 2008, 04:40 AM
    Why should I wait to have sex?
    I'll try to keep this short and to the point. Ive been divorced about 12 months now, my sex life had been dead for years. I have dated several guys since I split from my husband, I have read relationship books, self help books - the lot. They all seem to say that I should wait a 'certain amount of time' before I engage in sexual activity.. but why? I enjoy sex, I feel I missed out on a healthy sex life for years and basically I find it hard to hold out when I meet someone new. Do men, in general, really disrespect a woman for not holding out? If they do , why? Or is it dependent upon the particular guy? I don't want a heavy, very serious relationship but just to date someone regularly and have a healthy sex life!
    Its all so confusing!
    KBC's Avatar
    KBC Posts: 2,550, Reputation: 487
    Ultra Member
    		  
    #2

    Nov 29, 2008, 07:48 AM

    After the 'rebound' time,sex is correct.

    Don't beat yourself up over this,go and be a human being.

    The idea behind abstinence is to grieve the loss(divorce) and not to take refuge in sexual relations,to soften the pain.

    You have done your penance,now go enjoy your freedom.
    450donn's Avatar
    450donn Posts: 1,821, Reputation: 239
    Ultra Member
    		  
    #3

    Nov 29, 2008, 08:49 AM

    Well, lets see now, risk of pregnancy, and STD's are a couple of really good reasons to not have sex with people you are dating.
    The reasons most often given for not dating for a specific period after ending a long relationship are based on emotional. You are probably not emotionally ready to get involved in another relationship. It takes time to heal.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
    		  
    #4

    Nov 29, 2008, 09:48 AM

    Sex complicates things between partners. It stirs feelings, and distracts you from the real issues staring you in the face.

    You want a healthy sex life, it takes two healthy partners.

    It takes time to get a healthy partner, and verify that they are indeed healthy, or your asking for trouble. When I say healthy, I mean in body and mind and habits, and that requires paying attention and not just zooming someone you think is healthy, or HOPE THEY ARE.

    Some people seem to be healthy, but they are not. Time will tell so be careful. Just my opinion.
    buggie_666's Avatar
    buggie_666 Posts: 11, Reputation: 0
    New Member
    		  
    #5

    Nov 29, 2008, 08:36 PM
    If you feel redy that's when you should have sex not because the bible said so go out there and have sex!!
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