[2408]

First off I can't believe I'm writing here, but I'm tearing my hair out. I'm 20 currently at university in England, I've been going out with my girlfriend for 10 months, but I've known her since I was about 3, we both went to the same uni and things sparked. However she has the most amazing summer job as a safari guide out on Kenya, meanwhile I'm in Amman doing work expriance with the UN, I've only been away from her for 17 days (we're apart for two months, July and August) and frankly I found it fine whilst in the UK, there was loads to do and every time I felt down I just went and partied with mates.
However Amman is awful, I've only been here for 4 days (got 16 left) and I'm completely on my own, there is not a lot to do around here and everyone in the office is at least 10 years older than me. The result is I'm missing her so much I feel absolutely gutted, last night I walked into the flat I'm staying in, I saw her picture on my laptop and just burst into tears, it shocked me as much as anything, but the worst thing is it hasn't gone away, every time I think about her I get this lump in my throat, it's horibble.
What seems to make it worse is that she is having the time of her life, partying all night with the guests and riding in amoongst the animals during the day, I know she's not missing me at all, every e-mail just says how much fun she's having and ends with "lots of love", no "i miss you" or "i love you" or anything!
Is there anything I can do to sort my act out? Also I'm now worring I'll be unable to keep going with the relationhip, were only 1/4 of the way through the 2 months and I'm feeling so down I'm not sure I can bear the emotional torture for much longer, let alone another month and a half!!
Any advice would be hugely appreciated, sorry for sounding like such a wet blanket, can't believe I've let myself get like this!

[JBeaucaire]

I can't believe it either. You are NOT 5 years old any more. Your immediate wants no longer rule your entire universe. You're a man. Self-restraint and patience are absolute requirements for adult relationships.

You've dated long enough you know if you can trust her or not. Sounds like you can. I am HORRIFIED that you believe you cannot entertain yourself for 8 weeks. Not only CAN you do it, you can do it WELL. You will not use age differences between you and coworkers stop you from interacting with them, or at least trying to. You WON'T.

You can find something productive (not entertaining) to do with your free time in the evenings. Something you've always wanted to do and never did... learn karate, origami, basket-weaving, wood-working. You volunteer down at the public assistance shelters, you find ways to help other people instead of sitting home feeling all pitiful.

Seriously, dude, snap out of it. There is absolutely nothing wrong here you can't EASILY fix with some productive side work/job/people.

And don't you DARE entertain a single thought about how stable your relationship is during this. You need to be developing some life of your own ANYWAY since a stable relationship is two confident, self-assured people sharing their productive lives together, not two needy people all wrapped up in each other's every moment. (yuck!)

It's not emotional torture, it's lack of maturity you're experiencing right now. Only you can shake that off and put things back in perspective. Man up and get busy. Make productive use of this time. When she comes back in 6 weeks you SURELY better have your own accomplishments to show for that same time.

Get to it.

[Lovelee]

You've been apart for only 17 days and you miss her like crazy is understandable. You'd be surprised how quickly time will go by. It's important that you keep yourself occupied in the meantime so things wouldn't feel so unbearable.

My boyfriend went away for 3 months and I went through so many different emotions; anger, fear, lonliness and frustrations but he is back and right now we are happy, so don't lose face she will be back before you know it.

[eastcoast1]

Read JBs post 15 times buddy

[Romefalls19]

And after those 15 times... Read it another 15... JB is always right on the money with the advice!

[2408]

Yup, cheers JB, just like the proverb "rocket up arse do much good to pathetic english "

[talaniman]

Had to spread it JB, again, but you saved me a lot of typing.