[marycherry]

My mother and father are completley different people, my dad is very considering but does not let me hang out with friends, and tells me I need to spend more "family time" he reall does not trust me and does not let me hang out with guys AT ALL. My mom is hateful, and is very unconsiderate, all she cares about is herself and tries her hardest to make me hate everyone she tries to get me not to hang out with friends and tries to make me antisocial, she wouldn't even let me go to my best friends birthday party because she said "gas was too high" she lies about everything she makes my family do things she would never do and has an excuse for EVERYTHING she is really mean? Im considering moving out and living with my best friend so I can be away from both of them! What should I do?

[Sonador101]

Well you need to talk with your dad say "dad can we make a deal. on sundays and wendays (for example) i'll stay home and do family time, and on these other days i'll hang with my friends" you can also say that you will always be home for dinner or something. As for yoiur mom ask your dad to have a serious talk with here, if that doesn't work confront her, say "mom i like people, and i want friends, i don't care what you say!" be firm and say what you mean, don't run away.
Your dad doesn't sound as bad and tough as your mom, you got to mend some fences, and try to make it work. It may be that your mom willnever change, but running away just makes things worse.

[JBeaucaire]

Do not ever say to your mother "I don't care what you say." Don't do it, not ever.

Your parents are your protectors, not your friends. They can't afford it. You are young and at the age when what you think / feel IS YOUR WHOLE WORLD.

This is a very dangerous time for teens, and teens are the ones who have no idea what could happen, not the parents. The parents know full well, they were teenagers a VERY short few years ago, they know full well.

But every teen who has ever posted a question here on the forum inevitably believes "no one understands me, I'm different, I'm more mature than others my age." Even if any of that were true, inexperience is still your worst enemy.

Your parents are your backstop. If you screw up REALLY bad at your age, right now, the entire world will look at your parents and ask, "why didn't you do more to protect her?"

They know what their job is, your well-being, not your comfort or convenience. Definitely not your way.

If you want to get your way, you negotiate for it, like everyone else. It's a skill you have to develop. You won't do very well at first, but you keep trying. Keep learning. Eventually you will learn how to get small concessions from your parents in exchange for specific things you ACTUALLY DO for them to earn that concession.

I bet if you thought about it, you could come up with some ideas already.

[Nestorian]

Ah, yes, your parents are your protectors, that is true, keep it in mind when considering what you are asking them. Also be mindful of what they maybe feeling, no not as in, oh they feel I'm stupid, that is not a feeling. It's a statement, that is fauls as far as I can tell. Try to understand your father's conserns for your safety, and his feelings of fear, confusion (usually a mix of many feelings that people can't really interpret.), and Love.

As for your mother, I agree with the idea Sonador has, to a point. It is not helpful to argue with parents, because then much is said, usually not very true or important. Try to talk to them one at a time, I sugest your father first, then your mother.

But I suggest you yuse your feelings, and understanding, and compation when talking too them, that will help you, and may help your father (more than your mother.) see that you are a maturing women. Mind you a young one, but that is just how we grow due-et.

Peace.

[maliceluvsyou]

You need to ask your dad if they can compromise with you because at this age you need social time with your friends. Your mom sounded like my mom when I was in my teens. She always kept me in my room to stare at my walls. I never did anything wrong. True parents try their best to protect their children but they can't protect you from everything. Kids make their own mistakes, they make tons of mistakes! But kids will learn from them and that's how they get experience in life. I say parents should always talk to their kids even about the hard subjects like sex, and drugs. This will help teens understand what parents are trying to protect them from. Tho I know its more than just those two subjects. I hated it when my mom wouldn't listen or even trust me. All I wanted to do was hang out with my friends, she wouldn't even let them come over so she could see what we were doing. Parents who act like your mom are making the mistake by isolating you from the world. But you should not leave because yes it will make things worse. First try talking to your father and maybe he can talk to your mom.

[N0help4u]

How old are you? If you are under 18 you can not simply move in with your best friend or your parents can get them in legal trouble for harboring a minor.
Your parents probably don't hate you but are over protective.
They probably do trust you. They more than likely do not trust others.
You see it as hate because you feel it is cruel.